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Your MIND is your ENEMY
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Author:  Black Phantom [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 9:08 am ]
Post subject:  Your MIND is your ENEMY
Your MIND is your ENEMY

So what is the biggest enemy of confidence?

What is the thing that messes with your head when you're trying
to approach or talk to a girl?

What's the thing that get's you doubting of your worth, yourself
and your abilities?

Confidence as I defined it is about feeling good about yourself,
but also feeling sure and certain about yourself.

> Certain about what you're doing.

> Certain about what you're talking.

> Certain about where you're going.

But there is one thing, one enemy that is going to try to BREAK
that certainty more than any other thing.

That enemy...

Is your MIND.

Your mind works in weird ways.

It has the capacity to imagine all of the wonderful possibilities, but also to imagine all
of the horrible, exagarated things that will probably never happen...

So as you're talking with a girl, you might be confident untill
at one point your minds starts talking and says, "Do you know what
she's thinking of you?"

"You aren't cool enough...and you will mess it up soon".

Or you're trying to do something, and right before you do, your mind
starts talking "It's not going to work..."

Your mind is like a naughty kid in the playground, jumping on other
kids sandboxes and stepping on their sand castles.

It's not there to help you. It's there to try to make it harder for you.

So the question is, HOW do you stop your mind from playing tricks on you?

Do you even have any power over your mind?

The answer is YES, you do.

You see, the power that your mind has over you is in your taking it seriously.

Your mind is a spoiled kid who is running around and coming up with ways
to mess things up...and you're treating it like a grown up, responsible person.

The way you get power over your mind is by learning to NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY.

And instead of being WITH your mind, and listening to what it's saying, become
a detached OBSERVER of your mind who doesn't take it seriously but is entertained
by it.

So for example, when you want to approach a girl, you hear your mind say

"She's going to take a blow torch and burn your eye!"

...You become an observer, and you laugh at the imagination that your
mind has.

You don't take it seriously.

If you're talking with a girl and you hear your mind say:

"She thinks you're a poor guy who doesn't have anything to offer to her...and you're
going to mess it up..."

...again, become the observer of your mind and be entertained by the wild
imagination that your mind has.

If you're thinking of asking the girl out, and your mind says, "She's going
to laugh at you for thinking you can date her"

...observe your mind, detach yourself from it and say, "Thank you for
sharing Mind, your imagination is really creative. I'll ask this
girl out now, and you just sit tight"

Your mind is the enemy of Confidence.

It doesn't want to make you happy.

It wants to mess with you and play tricks.

It's a naughty kid, not a serious adult.

Don't take it seriously.

Observe it and be entertained by it.

And then ignore it and do what you want to do.

By the way, if you want to learn more stuff about how to
be confident with women, link's in the signature.

Phantom
Author:  The Mellow [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 11:41 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Your MIND is your ENEMY
Thank you for taking the time to write this. I am not hijacking your thread, but instead want to thank and share what you and others (shoutout to The Mack) in this forum have taught me within the past 3 months that helped my inner game IMMENSELY and will for the rest of my life.

What Black Phantom wrote about is exactly what helped me and has the potential to help many others here.

I recently read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle which made me more present and taught me how to "watch the thinker" and live inside the moment (not in the future or past, but the present moment with which you are in). By listening directly to the voice in your head without passing judgement on your thoughts you become aware of you emotions and observe your mind which is a fantastic thing to do because the emotions lose power over your state.

Since finishing that book and internalizing those ideas in the field, my life has changed completely.

You REALLY have to train your mind to do this sort of thing. I've found that breathing techniques help in disconnecting your mind and allow you to focus in on your body. Everyone will learn this or internalize these ideas in a different way, but you can't just read about it, you have to do it and start doing it a lot. I have even heard of some people who used relaxation breathing techniques so much that the habit became permanent and now they constantly breath in a 4 second in and out pattern only through their diaphragm without letting their chest raise. If it helps make it a habbit.

These are wise words here. Simple things like this used everyday have the power to change your life forever and I fucking mean that.

Thanks for sharing Phantom. Love the positivity and good vibes.
Author:  Playboi_ [ Fri Jun 20, 2014 1:18 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Your MIND is your ENEMY
Awesome post phantom. Listen in kids, dude is the truth! For any new-age guys that want a book they can relate to more than Power of Now, I always recommend the book 'Fuck It' by John Parkin.
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