PUA Forum :: what to do with your arms?

And one important thing... dont put your arms in pockets even if you think its cool... It's not "open" body lang, its disinterest etc...

Keep them low, dont hold drink in front of your chest keep it low also.

While walking, walk slow dont rush. Same about talking - talk slow and loud enough, dont lean in if she wanna tell you something, if you dont hear her she will lean to you or if she dont hear you she will also lean to you if she is interested. (some exceptions for loud clubs)

Be straight but relaxed always and smiled (but not like a dummy, learn to smile with "eyes"...

Those are most important things about body language

Hi

Pretty simple question really..

What do you do with your arms, when walking, standing still, sitting to convey confidence etc?

I have no idea!

Is there any theory on what it means to an arm or both on your hips? If so, what message does it communicate?

I was thinking about this before. To me it seems like you are serious about something, which is not necessarily bad but usually not very good for attracting girls. What do you guys think about this?

ike any body language the arm position alone doesn't paint the picture. You could make the arms-on-hip position look like a joke, a serious telling off, or a semi-metro model pose (or many other things) based on foot position and (most importantly) facial expression. Facial impression is the single most important thing in body language it provides such a great insight into how we are feeling, make sure you enter the club in a good present state and it will work in your favour without you even realising it.

Well there is also the psychological concept of mentally associating a mental state with something you do - so if you always do some physical action when you feel alpha, like hook your thumbs in your back pockets, then doing that can help you reach that mental state.

Point being it's your mental state that will actually give off the alpha vibe (in subtle phyisical cues that you CANNOT control consiously)

Author:	samdell [ Wed Feb 03, 2010 5:30 pm ]
Post subject:	what to do with your arms?
Hi Pretty simple question really.. What do you do with your arms, when walking, standing still, sitting to convey confidence etc? I have no idea!

Author:	magnum45 [ Thu Feb 04, 2010 9:56 am ]
Post subject:
your shoulders should be straight back and not slouched. When you talk you should use your hands a little. When you listen keep your hands down and relaxed by your sides. When you don't want something cross your arms over your chest.

Author:	CroPua [ Thu Feb 04, 2010 11:39 am ]
Post subject:
And one important thing... dont put your arms in pockets even if you think its cool... It's not "open" body lang, its disinterest etc... Keep them low, dont hold drink in front of your chest keep it low also. While walking, walk slow dont rush. Same about talking - talk slow and loud enough, dont lean in if she wanna tell you something, if you dont hear her she will lean to you or if she dont hear you she will also lean to you if she is interested. (some exceptions for loud clubs) Be straight but relaxed always and smiled (but not like a dummy, learn to smile with "eyes"... Those are most important things about body language .

Author:	magnum45 [ Tue Feb 09, 2010 12:52 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: And one important thing... dont put your arms in pockets even if you think its cool... It's not "open" body lang, its disinterest etc... Keep them low, dont hold drink in front of your chest keep it low also. While walking, walk slow dont rush. Same about talking - talk slow and loud enough, dont lean in if she wanna tell you something, if you dont hear her she will lean to you or if she dont hear you she will also lean to you if she is interested. (some exceptions for loud clubs) Be straight but relaxed always and smiled (but not like a dummy, learn to smile with "eyes"... Those are most important things about body language . talk slow and loud More important than body languange in my opinion. I can't stand people who talk fast.

Author:	Conker [ Wed Feb 10, 2010 3:35 am ]
Post subject:
It doesn't matter what you do, it's how you feel inside. If you conciously control your movements and inside you feel insecure, it's going to look exactly like what it is.

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Author:	The_Enforcer [ Mon Feb 15, 2010 7:34 am ]
Post subject:	Re: what to do with your arms?
Quote: Hi Pretty simple question really.. What do you do with your arms, when walking, standing still, sitting to convey confidence etc? I have no idea! Bicep curls and tricep extensions . But seriously when sitting I would relax them across the top of the chair (if the back is low enough), when leaning on a bar I would rest them on the bar, or of course, the most alpha thing of all: sit there with you arm around a HB. Hope that help.

Author:	GoldenWolf [ Thu Feb 18, 2010 11:10 am ]
Post subject:
Is there any theory on what it means to an arm or both on your hips? If so, what message does it communicate? I was thinking about this before. To me it seems like you are serious about something, which is not necessarily bad but usually not very good for attracting girls. What do you guys think about this?

Author:	The_Enforcer [ Thu Feb 18, 2010 11:50 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Is there any theory on what it means to an arm or both on your hips? If so, what message does it communicate? I was thinking about this before. To me it seems like you are serious about something, which is not necessarily bad but usually not very good for attracting girls. What do you guys think about this? Like any body language the arm position alone doesn't paint the picture. You could make the arms-on-hip position look like a joke, a serious telling off, or a semi-metro model pose (or many other things) based on foot position and (most importantly) facial expression. Facial impression is the single most important thing in body language it provides such a great insight into how we are feeling, make sure you enter the club in a good present state and it will work in your favour without you even realising it.

Author:	GoldenWolf [ Sat Feb 20, 2010 11:08 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: ike any body language the arm position alone doesn't paint the picture. You could make the arms-on-hip position look like a joke, a serious telling off, or a semi-metro model pose (or many other things) based on foot position and (most importantly) facial expression. Facial impression is the single most important thing in body language it provides such a great insight into how we are feeling, make sure you enter the club in a good present state and it will work in your favour without you even realising it. Good answer The_Enforcer, thanks. It all makes perfect sense .

Author:	The_Enforcer [ Sat Feb 20, 2010 11:02 pm ]
Post subject:
The reality of body language is this: There are many things you can do to improve it and control it - but excellent body language will come from being in a good present state. If you aren't confident/aren't feeling good in your own skin a whole lot of unusual and unpleasant things will manifest from no where. Things like talking fast, bouncing you leg, darting your eyes around, pecking and everything else.... You learn good body language to control this in the early days, but you will find as you develop genuine confidence you will notice that your body language improves without you even noticing it. This is a good reason to open warm-up sets on any night in the club, a little bit of momenteum goes a long way.

Author:	ballerjackson [ Tue Feb 23, 2010 8:50 pm ]
Post subject:
I forget where I heard it, but a good way to establish an alpha presence is to hook your thumbs in your back pockets when you're standing (eg at the bar, in line at the bathroom, etc). I still consciously do this, and immediately notice betas moving out of the way of you. Baller_J

Author:	Conker [ Tue Feb 23, 2010 9:24 pm ]
Post subject:
Well there is also the psychological concept of mentally associating a mental state with something you do - so if you always do some physical action when you feel alpha, like hook your thumbs in your back pockets, then doing that can help you reach that mental state. Point being it's your mental state that will actually give off the alpha vibe (in subtle phyisical cues that you CANNOT control consiously)

Author:	ballerjackson [ Tue Feb 23, 2010 9:54 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Well there is also the psychological concept of mentally associating a mental state with something you do - so if you always do some physical action when you feel alpha, like hook your thumbs in your back pockets, then doing that can help you reach that mental state. Point being it's your mental state that will actually give off the alpha vibe (in subtle phyisical cues that you CANNOT control consiously) Well said, Conker.

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