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| How to improve my lifestyle ? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=136&t=65876 |
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| Author: | E-sens [ Fri Apr 16, 2010 7:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | How to improve my lifestyle ? |
Alright Im kind of stuck here. Many people know me but they don't call me out to chill or have fun etc. With certain people Im really chatty but with others Im kind of quiet. Im mostly quiet among people when they know each other beforehand and Im kind of this stranger breaking into the group. Really uncomfortable in a sense and the roots of the problem could stretch way back when I was young. In the past, I was full of bullshit, talking crap and stuff like that. Always asking people questions and always getting left out in the process. So I kind of assumed that I was talking/asking too much so from then on I shut up. Recently, I tried asking people what their impression of me was(those who knew me when I was a kid) but they kept telling me to drop the subject. So Im basically known almost everywhere in school, I was the host(emcee) for school events, an actor in my school club, group leader for school camps and stuff like that. But PEOPLE NEVER call me out to chill or have fun and I don't understand why. I think I portray a cool, fun loving image but still I don't get invites to their activities. What's wrong ? And sorry for having you guys read thru this, just kinda thought I need to give some background info |
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| Author: | Delusion [ Fri Apr 16, 2010 9:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How to improve my lifestyle ? |
Quote: Alright Im kind of stuck here. Many people know me but they don't call me out to chill or have fun etc. With certain people Im really chatty but with others Im kind of quiet.
Be energetic and chatty to every person you meet. People will notice you as a very friendly person on the whole. What's the worst thing that can happen? Also, do you call people to hang out?Quote:
Im mostly quiet among people when they know each other beforehand and Im kind of this stranger breaking into the group. Really uncomfortable in a sense and the roots of the problem could stretch way back when I was young.
I don't understand this paragraph too well. If you mean you have absolutely no close friends, then make some just in class. Joining a club/sports team that people you are interested in becoming friends with can be extremely helpful.Quote: In the past, I was full of bullshit, talking crap and stuff like that. Always asking people questions and always getting left out in the process. So I kind of assumed that I was talking/asking too much so from then on I shut up. Recently, I tried asking people what their impression of me was(those who knew me when I was a kid) but they kept telling me to drop the subject.
I hate to say this, but you really do not want to ask those type of questions to people as I imagine you have few close friends (your thread makes this sound like the case). This includes asking peoples' impression of you. Also, don't talk about yourself like that, it's demeaning even if it was from the past. You make friends soooo much easier if you like yourself.Quote:
So Im basically known almost everywhere in school, I was the host(emcee) for school events, an actor in my school club, group leader for school camps and stuff like that. But PEOPLE NEVER call me out to chill or have fun and I don't understand why. I think I portray a cool, fun loving image but still I don't get invites to their activities.
Maybe you aren't being friendly enough. Also, you usually need to make the first move if you want to make your social life more active. People will want to hang out with their close friends more then a kid they talk with a little bit at school if they are free for the evening. It seems like you have a good start, and you can probably make some friends easily |
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| Author: | E-sens [ Sun Apr 18, 2010 12:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How to improve my lifestyle ? |
Quote: Quote: Alright Im kind of stuck here. Many people know me but they don't call me out to chill or have fun etc. With certain people Im really chatty but with others Im kind of quiet.
Be energetic and chatty to every person you meet. People will notice you as a very friendly person on the whole. What's the worst thing that can happen? Also, do you call people to hang out?Quote:
Im mostly quiet among people when they know each other beforehand and Im kind of this stranger breaking into the group. Really uncomfortable in a sense and the roots of the problem could stretch way back when I was young.
I don't understand this paragraph too well. If you mean you have absolutely no close friends, then make some just in class. Joining a club/sports team that people you are interested in becoming friends with can be extremely helpful.Quote: In the past, I was full of bullshit, talking crap and stuff like that. Always asking people questions and always getting left out in the process. So I kind of assumed that I was talking/asking too much so from then on I shut up. Recently, I tried asking people what their impression of me was(those who knew me when I was a kid) but they kept telling me to drop the subject.
I hate to say this, but you really do not want to ask those type of questions to people as I imagine you have few close friends (your thread makes this sound like the case). This includes asking peoples' impression of you. Also, don't talk about yourself like that, it's demeaning even if it was from the past. You make friends soooo much easier if you like yourself.Quote:
So Im basically known almost everywhere in school, I was the host(emcee) for school events, an actor in my school club, group leader for school camps and stuff like that. But PEOPLE NEVER call me out to chill or have fun and I don't understand why. I think I portray a cool, fun loving image but still I don't get invites to their activities.
Maybe you aren't being friendly enough. Also, you usually need to make the first move if you want to make your social life more active. People will want to hang out with their close friends more then a kid they talk with a little bit at school if they are free for the evening. It seems like you have a good start, and you can probably make some friends easily |
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| Author: | Delusion [ Sun Apr 18, 2010 6:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How to improve my lifestyle ? |
Quote:
Hmm kind of like. Let's say there's this club and I recently joined. So everyone knows each other for like a year or so. I tend to get uncomfortable when having to break into their group. Yet Im comfortable with approaching strangers individually.
Have you tried this? Honestly, it's much easier then it sounds. Also, people aren't always grouped, and most clubs mix in people (for example, track).
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