A library or Amazon dude, come on, we're online you can find books
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| The End Of Being A Loser - Read Please Advice Needed https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=136&t=133502 |
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| Author: | Playa93 [ Sun Apr 15, 2012 2:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | The End Of Being A Loser - Read Please Advice Needed |
Hey guys, I just want to tell you my story, and hope you will help me changing my lifestyle. I have been living in a small town, in a small school for nearly whole my life.. Then suddenly, me and my family moved to a bigger town, in a big school. And my style was the same as it was in my old school. I never looked cool, I never had expensive clothes. So that year was a hell for me, so was year 2. It was a shame, I was so shamed of my self. I had cool friends though, problem was, I looked like an idiot for 2 fucking years in a big school. Year 3 ( current year). I got into a boarding school, I bumped into a guy who told me about a pick up master on youtube. But he wasn't really interested in it. But when I saw the video, I gravedigged it. And found about this forum. And I have been following this forum for almost a half year. I have read and read a lot of stuff about picking up chicks, and now I really understand what I did which was wrong. Now I finally take care of my self, I bought expensive clothes and getting a job soon to be more social. Now to the advices that I need.. Next year (4) I'm going to campus I want some advice on how I should deal with all the people that knew me for being a boring, non-social guy who never goes partying. How should I be in class? how should I be forward all the people? guys and girls? How to act?? In the past years I have never spoken to girls. I know that I need to change on that, but how can I do it? Please help me guys.. |
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| Author: | artfulroger [ Thu Apr 19, 2012 7:10 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Well look at me, offering advice on the same day I signed up. But Psychology is my area, and I believe I can offer some advice on remodelling, by no means am I a PUA, but I have done social remodelling on myself, now I just need to sort my "game" out. The important thing is analysing yourself, being able to look at your unconscious behaviours and becoming aware of them. Like for instance since you say you're being quiet around people, a good place to start is when someone is talking or recalling anecdotes etc. simple things like nodding and saying "yeah" occasionally and laughing when everyone else does makes you look involved. That's just a basic thing to get you started. But the key thing is, it's vital you get rid of this image in your head, if you're always expecting to be labelled as the withdrawn quiet guy, you will constantly play up to this without being aware of it. so that's where the self awareness comes in, so you can say I'm not that guy any more, and try to begin to get more socially involved. (A great book, but very scientific is Joe Dispenza's - the science of changing your mind, or his other breaking the habit of being yourself. Both very accessible in terms of understanding how the mind works and teaching self awareness. Next a simple trick to get people to like you is asking questions about them, it's well known in psychology that people remember you as a nice person if you ask them questions about themselves. Then if you can share an experience of the same thing great. Also like game I would say, have some prepared stuff to talk about with people, you've got great openers from just talking about the work or lecture you've just had. But also if you really struggling to connect with people, right down a list of your hobbies and interests, like books, films, TV, music, and slowly drop those subjects in there to ask about, build some common ground. A major thing I noticed in growing up, that everything is taken a face value in early to late teens, I'm only 22 but I have realised that people of that age range will categorise you no matter what on how long you hair is, the label on jacket, whether your clothes are too baggy or skinny. The funny thing is that's how groups get divided, and these groups claim to be so individual, cool, and original by frankly looking and acting exactly like each other. By suppressing exactly what makes them individual inside by allowing themselves to fit in. Make sure you don't do that, don't pretend to be someone you're not, pretend to be the idealized version of yourself and set about plans and manageable ways of doing that. Also just so you are aware, change is hard, what you're essentially doing is a mental refurbishment. The brain hates that, the brain loves patterns and balance of the same things, this is why people give up on so much like PUA, weight loss, smoking, any thing and everything that takes time and effort. One last tip, be open to new experiences that's the best thing you can do, do new things as much as you can, learning, new experiences, that will keep you occupied and inspired I believe, don't sit around dwelling and wishing, make it happen, it will be hard and it will take work, and it will take time, don't expect it to kick in tomorrow. |
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| Author: | Playa93 [ Mon Apr 23, 2012 3:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for your advices man. But one last thing? Where can i get these books? |
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| Author: | Lockdown [ Sat Apr 28, 2012 2:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
A library or Amazon dude, come on, we're online you can find books
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