PUA Forum :: Was I shit-tested?

I agree. Don't respond. Let her come to you. Esp if you've already fkd. She should seek validation from you eventually.

Is the other friend a guy or girl?

Come on, this is not a shit test. She is not testing you in any way, she is just rude. You are probably right when you say you're not on the same page. I'll tell you a similar story ands maybe it will help you:

So I met this girl on tinder 2.5 weeks before valentine's day with the objective of fucking her. First date, we kissed. Second date, she ended up at my apartment and FC. In the next few days, we went out for coffee and lunch. Then came the day before valentine's day. At this point, I was considering her as potential GF material. I texted her and tried to organise something as this seemed like it was evolving to a relationship. To my big surprise, she said "Sorry, none of my friends have plans so we are just going to do a girl's night". I was speechless. Your friends have no plan? Who cares, you have one! Turned out, I saw it as a potential relationship and she saw it as just sex (how the tables have turned lol

)

Maybe, your girl does not see you as bf material?

Some background: Cooking is my favorite hobby and one where I've built up a lot of skill.
Been dating this one girl for about 3 weeks, no problems at all.

I set up a date with her for tonight - I was going to cook one of my best dishes, with wine and candlelight at my place.

She texts me 2 hours before she's supposed to arrive: "I just got out of class, I'm gonna chill with my friend, won't be able to chill with you tonight."

Granted, I hadn't started any of the meal prep yet, so no loss there, but I was unsure what to text back. I just told her to come over tomorrow then.

Was that a shit-test? What would have been a more game-skilled way of handling it?

Author:	MarkyGras [ Mon Jul 14, 2014 10:23 pm ]
Post subject:	Was I shit-tested?
Some background: Cooking is my favorite hobby and one where I've built up a lot of skill. Been dating this one girl for about 3 weeks, no problems at all. I set up a date with her for tonight - I was going to cook one of my best dishes, with wine and candlelight at my place. She texts me 2 hours before she's supposed to arrive: "I just got out of class, I'm gonna chill with my friend, won't be able to chill with you tonight." Granted, I hadn't started any of the meal prep yet, so no loss there, but I was unsure what to text back. I just told her to come over tomorrow then. Was that a shit-test? What would have been a more game-skilled way of handling it?

Author:	neo87 [ Tue Jul 15, 2014 1:20 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Just sounds rude. Have you slept with this girl? Does she like you?

Author:	MarkyGras [ Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:36 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
I have slept with her before - we bang at the end of every date. I'm starting to think we just weren't on the same page, and she thought we were just going to chill & order a pizza. You know how it is - after awhile, you start to see everything through the pua lens

Author:	Mastermind9000 [ Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:40 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
I'm going to call it a shit test. If she likes you, then mentioning that she is hanging out with someone else would be meant to make you jealous. Don't react.

Author:	CharlesFinley [ Tue Jul 15, 2014 12:45 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
I don't really think it's a shit test... but it sure is flaky and rude as fuck. I'd be freezing her out for a few days...

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Author:	masterm1ne [ Wed Jul 16, 2014 9:05 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
I agree. Don't respond. Let her come to you. Esp if you've already fkd. She should seek validation from you eventually. Is the other friend a guy or girl?

Author:	MarkyGras [ Fri Jul 18, 2014 10:20 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Quote: I agree. Don't respond. Let her come to you. Esp if you've already fkd. She should seek validation from you eventually. Is the other friend a guy or girl? A girl. Yeah, I've moved this chick down my priority list

Author:	JoeCrunk [ Mon Jul 21, 2014 4:43 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Yes this was a "shit test". I say that in quotations because she probably wasn't intentionally doing a shit test she just wasn't all that interested in meeting with you and theoretically the reason for that was you had not kept enough attraction simmering beneath the surface by continuing to apply playful negs at each opportune moment. Take this advice with a grain of sand its all the theoretical. Good luck I know you can do it. Experiment more with playful fun homegrown negs. youll probably overdo negging at first but with enough experience you'll learn how to use that tool in balance with the rest of your tool set. Be willing to fail as you learn

Author:	JoeCrunk [ Mon Jul 21, 2014 4:46 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
For example when she said that you might have said oh don't worry about me I'll just wrap myself in a quilt and cuddle up with my pillow and watch some episodes of Bridget Jones diary tonight instead. But of course you're in the whole situation and you would know intuitively what would be proper for you to say

Author:	masterm1ne [ Mon Jul 21, 2014 9:28 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Ok well since it's a girl it's not that bad. But if she hasn't responded by now... next! I don't text women after I've forgotten about them, neither will you, neither will she.

Author:	NorthBoy [ Tue Jul 22, 2014 8:30 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Come on, this is not a shit test. She is not testing you in any way, she is just rude. You are probably right when you say you're not on the same page. I'll tell you a similar story ands maybe it will help you: So I met this girl on tinder 2.5 weeks before valentine's day with the objective of fucking her. First date, we kissed. Second date, she ended up at my apartment and FC. In the next few days, we went out for coffee and lunch. Then came the day before valentine's day. At this point, I was considering her as potential GF material. I texted her and tried to organise something as this seemed like it was evolving to a relationship. To my big surprise, she said "Sorry, none of my friends have plans so we are just going to do a girl's night". I was speechless. Your friends have no plan? Who cares, you have one! Turned out, I saw it as a potential relationship and she saw it as just sex (how the tables have turned lol ) Maybe, your girl does not see you as bf material?

Author:	neo87 [ Tue Jul 22, 2014 11:51 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Quote: Come on, this is not a shit test. She is not testing you in any way, she is just rude. You are probably right when you say you're not on the same page. I'll tell you a similar story ands maybe it will help you: So I met this girl on tinder 2.5 weeks before valentine's day with the objective of fucking her. First date, we kissed. Second date, she ended up at my apartment and FC. In the next few days, we went out for coffee and lunch. Then came the day before valentine's day. At this point, I was considering her as potential GF material. I texted her and tried to organise something as this seemed like it was evolving to a relationship. To my big surprise, she said "Sorry, none of my friends have plans so we are just going to do a girl's night". I was speechless. Your friends have no plan? Who cares, you have one! Turned out, I saw it as a potential relationship and she saw it as just sex (how the tables have turned lol ) Maybe, your girl does not see you as bf material? Huh? I don't think that means she's not serious about you. She had plans with her friends before. You expect her to bail on her friends on vday, for a new guy. She probably likes you and just had plans.

Author:	BrandonMarshall [ Sun Jul 27, 2014 4:28 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
Quote: Some background: Cooking is my favorite hobby and one where I've built up a lot of skill. Been dating this one girl for about 3 weeks, no problems at all. I set up a date with her for tonight - I was going to cook one of my best dishes, with wine and candlelight at my place. She texts me 2 hours before she's supposed to arrive: "I just got out of class, I'm gonna chill with my friend, won't be able to chill with you tonight." Granted, I hadn't started any of the meal prep yet, so no loss there, but I was unsure what to text back. I just told her to come over tomorrow then. Was that a shit-test? What would have been a more game-skilled way of handling it? Don't know if I even want to consider it a shit-test. All I know is I would've cut her off completely for that bullshit. Flaking is one thing... but to straight up say "I'm gonna chill with my friend instead". Fuck no.

Author:	flamingace96 [ Sun Jul 27, 2014 7:22 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
"im gonna chill with my friend instead" WTF What the living fuck? dont even text this girl again. Delete her number asap. Sometimes i dont understand how women can disrespect someone like that. I mean wtf?? I understand if she would've said "oh i cant make it" or if she just didnt reply but who says im chilling with my friends? She's saying that you were just a fuck toy and u are not someone she respects; she flat out told you that her friend was more important than u. She knew u and her had plans but she made plans with her friend last minute... WTF. Screw her and use her as motivation for improving your game.

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Author:	snapshot99 [ Sun Jul 27, 2014 8:46 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Was I shit-tested?
You were more invested in taking the interaction to the next level then she is, hence the flaky behaviour. When a girl is invested(attraction + compliance) in you, she'll blow off her friends and family just to spend time with you. And once a girl flakes on you once without consequences for her, more flaking behaviour can be expected. Solution: - tell her you her in your future and her current behaviour is playing her commitment to you in question - freeze her out until she comes back and put things right(make a nice meal for you or takes you to a good food place) - meet other girls while she is 'chilling with her friend' so that she can see you are preselected by other women and they are in abundance in your life (hence her scarcity does not effect you) You've allowed her into your world, if she let's herself out through flakiness then she can find her way back through committing and respecting your time and efforts.