PUA Forum :: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you are

I had this situation happen to me two weeks ago, almost to the nail in fact. I'm 22 and this girl I'm interested in is 29. We went out to a bar tried to kiss her, went horrible, got rejected she said "I'm not that kind of girl" and stuff like "I'm way too old for you."

I started by telling her her age doesn't matter, I used strong humor to help get over that "invisible barrier" because the truth is, it's bullshit if two people are attracted, age is irrelevant.

For example, in text messages I said "Hey I got my fake I.D. that says I'm 40 so we can go out now!" or "You're not in bed already are you old grandma?" Every woman will respond differently, but I took puaninja's advice he gave on here and built tons of kino with her to see if we still had good chemistry.

We did and now it's a casual one-night hook up kind of thing that may or may not lead to me seeing her again.

That's all I got, hope it

Cheers!

Author:	Athenian [ Fri Jan 04, 2013 11:45 pm ]
Post subject:	What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you are
I was out for NYE and I got talking with a girl who seemed very nice. She asked me how old I was, to which I made her guess. She said 22 and so I told her she was spot on. She said she was 28, and that she looks for older men. Although it was evident that there was mutual interest there, she would not forget about the age issue however much I tried. For example, I tried explain to her that time is man made and that we shouldn't let it be a variable when meeting people who are good company. Do you have any ideas? When I say ideas I mean natural, witty things - not some bullsh!t routine that makes me out to be someone I am not. Looking forward to seeing what you guys think! (My first post of 2013, so happy new year!)

Author:	donttakemywordasthetruth [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 1:03 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
I would ask her why she thinks that.

Author:	Synergypua [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 4:18 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
I've had the same problem before. I'm 22 and look a little older so girls often guess 25-27 and then they're surprised I'm so young. I tend to say similar things to you like "age is just a number" etc. Sometimes if they ask me my age when I know they're older I will never tell them and will just say "I don't think it's important, I don't like to judge by age." and most people seem to be cool with this. It helps that I genuinely believe that, I think the most important thing is to not be self-conscious of the fact that you're younger than her because that will only exaggerate it. If you genuinely don't have any issue with it then she will probably find that she doesn't either. In this instance it sounds like she was shit-testing you, why would she suddenly mention that she likes to date older men unless she was thinking about dating you? She wouldn't have, she would just have politely lost interest and left. Just don't react to the shit test and hold your frame! If she keeps brining it up change the subject. One last thing about this kind of age gap: I think these kind of girls often do "like to DATE older men" but that doesn't mean they wouldn't FUCK a younger man. Depends what you were after with this girl but that's just a thought. Hope that helps. Synergy

Author:	enesta [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 6:10 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
Quote: I would ask her why she thinks that. He didn't expand on this, but this is very good advice. If you aren't self conscious about the fact that you're younger, ultimately it's not going to matter to her no matter how much she harps on it. Rather than try to shy away from it, put it front and center, but on her. Figure out why she feels that way. I also find it very helpful to be self deprecating in a confident fashion. Joke about the fact that you're young - say you're an immature little bastard. If it's not congruent with the rest of your interaction, she'll find it humorous and give you points for being self-assured.

Author:	The Mellow [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 11:12 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
I had this situation happen to me two weeks ago, almost to the nail in fact. I'm 22 and this girl I'm interested in is 29. We went out to a bar tried to kiss her, went horrible, got rejected she said "I'm not that kind of girl" and stuff like "I'm way too old for you." I started by telling her her age doesn't matter, I used strong humor to help get over that "invisible barrier" because the truth is, it's bullshit if two people are attracted, age is irrelevant. For example, in text messages I said "Hey I got my fake I.D. that says I'm 40 so we can go out now!" or "You're not in bed already are you old grandma?" Every woman will respond differently, but I took puaninja's advice he gave on here and built tons of kino with her to see if we still had good chemistry. We did and now it's a casual one-night hook up kind of thing that may or may not lead to me seeing her again. That's all I got, hope it helps. Cheers!

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Author:	Athenian [ Mon Jan 07, 2013 10:55 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
Thank you all for your views and opinions. There are some really good points there which are useful.

Author:	White Lion [ Mon Jan 07, 2013 11:07 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
I would have blown the age thing up and made it outrageous. "I date older guys." "Me too! I mean, young men like me are so youthful and full of life, too fast paced. They are also horny all the damn time. I mean, christ, who wants a young man who has his stuff together, is attractive and funny? NOT ME!" She will laugh and realize how absurd it is. And I always put the sexual agenda on the table when I blow of tests like this.

Author:	Athenian [ Mon Jan 14, 2013 11:24 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
What do you mean when you say "put the sexual agenda on the table"?

Author:	iamjstar [ Tue Jan 15, 2013 6:21 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
Correct me if I'm wrong but I think it just means holding your frame against the test. By avoiding the test you've punched a hole in your frame effectively. Instead of you just went head first into it and said what you believed; then she would've been able to feel the genuine belief behind your words.

Author:	davidlov [ Tue Jan 22, 2013 10:01 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
before you answer, say "well, how old are you?" she replies and then you say "i remember when i was that age hahahas, actually im not quite there yet but you know what? im taller than you!"

Author:	davidlov [ Tue Jan 22, 2013 10:10 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
Quote: I had this situation happen to me two weeks ago, almost to the nail in fact. I'm 22 and this girl I'm interested in is 29. We went out to a bar tried to kiss her, went horrible, got rejected she said "I'm not that kind of girl" and stuff like "I'm way too old for you." I started by telling her her age doesn't matter, I used strong humor to help get over that "invisible barrier" because the truth is, it's bullshit if two people are attracted, age is irrelevant. For example, in text messages I said "Hey I got my fake I.D. that says I'm 40 so we can go out now!" or "You're not in bed already are you old grandma?" Every woman will respond differently, but I took puaninja's advice he gave on here and built tons of kino with her to see if we still had good chemistry. We did and now it's a casual one-night hook up kind of thing that may or may not lead to me seeing her again. That's all I got, hope it Cheers! it worked cause she was bluffing and she was horny, but if i were you i would have said "well, when im 28 ill invent a time machine and go back in time then try that kiss one more time and see how that goes but 28 and not 29 cause then ill be too close to 30 hahaha" but saying it with a jokingly smile ofcourse. smiling is always important when you know very little about eachother.

Author:	mixar [ Fri Jan 25, 2013 4:12 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
If its a shit test then test her back. "oh you don't date younger guys, I don't date older girls, I just like to have sex with them"

Author:	AFC AzA [ Fri Jan 25, 2013 4:41 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
put the pressure on them. make them feel bad for their age if they shit test you about age. HB: how old are you ME: younger than you (while sexually kino-ing) HB: you must be like 18 ME: yeah (in deep sexual voice, looking deep in their eye)

Author:	7seven [ Fri Feb 01, 2013 11:47 am ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
I always reply with an exaggeration: "How old are you?" "86" (Extremely serious face) "No, really?" "86, really." (Cheeky smile) She might shit test you by continuously asking or saying that 86 is too old for her, but generally this works pretty well.

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Author:	Maxxtro [ Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:02 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: What to say when an older girl/woman asks how old you ar
Quote: I always reply with an exaggeration: "How old are you?" "86" (Extremely serious face) "No, really?" "86, really." (Cheeky smile) She might shit test you by continuously asking or saying that 86 is too old for her, but generally this works pretty well. This is what I usually say. Most people will laugh at this and you can move on to more interesting things (who cares about age anyway?)