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Oneitis and my next move
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Author:  saitek [ Wed Dec 19, 2012 1:23 am ]
Post subject:  Oneitis and my next move
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
Author:  MaxPower5150 [ Wed Dec 19, 2012 5:07 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
Im certainly no master, but when it comes time to be direct, be brutally honest. I would say something like "I dont need anymore friends, but you're a really cool person and I wish you all the best". Unless of course you actually can set aside your feelings and just be friends with her. But if thats the case you have to realize that it will NEVER be anything more than that, and you'll have to stomach seeing her romantically involved with other dudes.
Author:  wingintyme [ Wed Dec 19, 2012 5:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
The quote you posted that she said, are you sure she said "never" or was it "ever"? the word ever would make more sense. Otherwise it seems like you are cutting out details.

If it's "never" then you have possibly said something to her a month ago that has stuck out in her mind.

what you may want to do as a response is say something cryptic like "Hey! I'm a tad busy. will explain later". Then wait about 2+ hours and explain yourself. Or you can freeze her out by seeing if she responds to that. There are about 3 or 4 ways she can interpret my response that may leave her coming back.
Author:  saitek [ Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Quote:
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
The quote you posted that she said, are you sure she said "never" or was it "ever"? the word ever would make more sense. Otherwise it seems like you are cutting out details.

If it's "never" then you have possibly said something to her a month ago that has stuck out in her mind.

what you may want to do as a response is say something cryptic like "Hey! I'm a tad busy. will explain later". Then wait about 2+ hours and explain yourself. Or you can freeze her out by seeing if she responds to that. There are about 3 or 4 ways she can interpret my response that may leave her coming back.
She said never, Her friend told me she was angry over the fact I havent spoke to her and been avoiding her and she just found out I deleted her as a friend on fb.
Author:  saitek [ Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Quote:
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
Im certainly no master, but when it comes time to be direct, be brutally honest. I would say something like "I dont need anymore friends, but you're a really cool person and I wish you all the best". Unless of course you actually can set aside your feelings and just be friends with her. But if thats the case you have to realize that it will NEVER be anything more than that, and you'll have to stomach seeing her romantically involved with other dudes.
I can see that this might be the very last option I might go with..., I see her around a lot because shes in my social group, so when I said were not friends anymore does it mean freezing her out forever or how does that work?
Author:  wingintyme [ Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
The quote you posted that she said, are you sure she said "never" or was it "ever"? the word ever would make more sense. Otherwise it seems like you are cutting out details.

If it's "never" then you have possibly said something to her a month ago that has stuck out in her mind.

what you may want to do as a response is say something cryptic like "Hey! I'm a tad busy. will explain later". Then wait about 2+ hours and explain yourself. Or you can freeze her out by seeing if she responds to that. There are about 3 or 4 ways she can interpret my response that may leave her coming back.
She said never, Her friend told me she was angry over the fact I havent spoke to her and been avoiding her and she just found out I deleted her as a friend on fb.
It sounds like you may have put yourself in a decent spot with this one then.

One trend I have learned about women is that it is not uncommon to go weeks or months without seeing them or hearing from them. You forget about them. But sometimes if you pop back up they have a greater appreciation for you later. The forum doesn't know all the details that lead up to your question so it's hard to give decent advice
Author:  saitek [ Thu Dec 20, 2012 4:09 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
It sounds like you may have put yourself in a decent spot with this one then.

One trend I have learned about women is that it is not uncommon to go weeks or months without seeing them or hearing from them. You forget about them. But sometimes if you pop back up they have a greater appreciation for you later. The forum doesn't know all the details that lead up to your question so it's hard to give decent advice
Well the whole story is, I met her three years ago because my good friend dated her, they had like a two year relationship and he broke it off. She was heartbroken and then a year after they broke up she started talking to my other friend and all of a sudden, he stopped talking to her and got himself a different girlfriend. She got heartbroken after that too and then a year pass and I come in, just to give it a shot. We talked and hung out ALOT like three times a week and we would talk and chill for hours on the phone and everything (kinda afc, I learned to not talk on the phone too much now). We were like super flirty and everything, we went on many dates and cuddled and everything (I never really closed). so I decided to ask her out and she said that she doesn't want to be in a relationship with anyone right now (mind you she had like a year of space). I told her to give it a day before answering and she gave me the its not you its me speech, and how she had no time to have a boyfriend. Me still liking her so much gave it a chance to be friends but as you know things got awkward and I decided to just stop talking to her and avoid her all around because it hurts to be reminded every time I see her. So I gave up and froze her out/ avoided her, deleted all contacts,even though I see her around in school almost everyday. I sometimes say Hi but most of the time I just try to pretend I never seen her and went on with my day. Then randomly this happened and that's my whole situation. What I wonder is, how am I suppose to act around her if I break it off that we aren't friends anymore because I still see her around alot, shes in my social group and a few of my classes.
Author:  Wizzay [ Thu Dec 20, 2012 1:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Yo, I can totally relate to your story, im experiencing the same thing so imma type out what I think and hope you find your answer, and if you do please let me know :)

So basically same story except after one time I asked her if she's playing games with me? She said no and I just tried to kiss her, but she didn't want to and told me she likes someone else and I was like , alright cool then, I accept the fact that I tried and it didn't work. Done. Now im gonna do what you did and totally freeze her out(Done it many times before ) and usually most girls (sometimes 1 month sometimes 1 year) will send a message in some way, like i miss talking to you etc, and then i'll be like yeah cool, okay, ok, bye. Like I totally don't care and im comfortable with myself after what she did(or didn't do..). Get my point? in your case just say be like" I really like you yeah, and wanna be friends, but I just cant tolerate the thought of you being with someone else, so thats why i'm doing this. Wish you the best of luck. " Something like what the dude in the 2nd post said ,except explaining why (that you cant see her kissing someone else).

Goodluck bro


Edit: How you're supposed to act with her around? Just be yourself and have fun.. Show her that you're having fun without her, and believe me when I say she will miss you more and more and want you more and more ;). When that happens and she signs that she wants you, its your time to think if you still want her, or if youd rather be with someone else that doesn't play games.
Author:  mattyicesototesgrand [ Fri Dec 21, 2012 8:21 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Quote:
Long story short, I had oneitis with a girl I knew for a few years , after a month of talking she gave me LJBF speech and I no contact froze her out for a month while trying to game other girls. She texted me RANDOMLY yesterday "If you never wanted to be friends, you could have atleast told me."
What does this mean? Do I act like I don't care or do I try to be humorous with this whole situation, do I explain myself? I was about to move on also, but I do really care for this girl. HELP ME PUA MASTERS
Im certainly no master, but when it comes time to be direct, be brutally honest. I would say something like "I dont need anymore friends, but you're a really cool person and I wish you all the best". Unless of course you actually can set aside your feelings and just be friends with her. But if thats the case you have to realize that it will NEVER be anything more than that, and you'll have to stomach seeing her romantically involved with other dudes.
That's only partially true in my opinion. It IS possible to get our of the friend zone. Not easy, but it is definitely possible. You're in damage control right now though. Do you want to get with her? Do you want to be her friend? Or do you want her our of your life?
Author:  mattyicesototesgrand [ Fri Dec 21, 2012 8:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
Quote:
Quote:
It sounds like you may have put yourself in a decent spot with this one then.

One trend I have learned about women is that it is not uncommon to go weeks or months without seeing them or hearing from them. You forget about them. But sometimes if you pop back up they have a greater appreciation for you later. The forum doesn't know all the details that lead up to your question so it's hard to give decent advice
Well the whole story is, I met her three years ago because my good friend dated her, they had like a two year relationship and he broke it off. She was heartbroken and then a year after they broke up she started talking to my other friend and all of a sudden, he stopped talking to her and got himself a different girlfriend. She got heartbroken after that too and then a year pass and I come in, just to give it a shot. We talked and hung out ALOT like three times a week and we would talk and chill for hours on the phone and everything (kinda afc, I learned to not talk on the phone too much now). We were like super flirty and everything, we went on many dates and cuddled and everything (I never really closed). so I decided to ask her out and she said that she doesn't want to be in a relationship with anyone right now (mind you she had like a year of space). I told her to give it a day before answering and she gave me the its not you its me speech, and how she had no time to have a boyfriend. Me still liking her so much gave it a chance to be friends but as you know things got awkward and I decided to just stop talking to her and avoid her all around because it hurts to be reminded every time I see her. So I gave up and froze her out/ avoided her, deleted all contacts,even though I see her around in school almost everyday. I sometimes say Hi but most of the time I just try to pretend I never seen her and went on with my day. Then randomly this happened and that's my whole situation. What I wonder is, how am I suppose to act around her if I break it off that we aren't friends anymore because I still see her around alot, shes in my social group and a few of my classes.

Dude, I'm telling you I've been in this exact situation until I grew a set of balls (no offense), but I literally just fucked my what was once my biggest "oneitis" a couple hours ago. It takes a lot of time, and you'll have to go out and GFTOW, but seriously man it is possible. Never think you can't do something, never accept anything as inevitable. Do some inner game shit, or just PM me and I'll be glad to help you out if I can.
Author:  wingintyme [ Fri Dec 21, 2012 6:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Oneitis and my next move
my main question would be why are you putting so much thought and effort in to something that both your buddies already broke up with? If she's not good enough for them why is she good enough for you. Don't dismiss her as a friend but stop concerning yourself with her and move on.
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