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How do I stay Alpha and dominant?
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Author:  Fluffs [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 10:20 am ]
Post subject:  How do I stay Alpha and dominant?
My situation:
I have a gf, she's cute, younger than me, I'd call her a HB8 or HB9 (no make-up, EVER.)
I'm extremelly introvert, I barely know anything about the city I've lived in for like 10 years. (I'm 17) I don't have almost ANY friends, because I don't really like hanging out and being around people. Well, my thing here mainly is that I don't know how to LEAD her anywhere, she knows way more about the city and people here.

How can I be the leading one in this situation? I meet her all the time and this is a thing that really bugs me. ;[

I have no self-esteem issues etc., I just need a way to lead.

TL;DR version:
I need a way to feel Alpha around a girl that "knows better what, how and where".
Author:  puaninja [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 2:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
Dude, I can totally relate. I have the same issues and I'm a grown-ass man. I've had gf's and dates taking me around town, leading me. That's such a DLV/beta thing to have happen to a man. But the truth is that I never put forth the effort to learn about everything my city had to offer or bother to go out and do new things. I'm better now than I used to be, thanks in part to learning pick up.

You'll have to start somewhere, even faking it till you make it. You need to establish one or two spots that you can use as a destination, and one or two people that you know or you can meet up with to establish yourself as being social proof. You can even get away with making up the people's names, but make sure to speak about them as though you may be meeting up with them or that you previously did this really cool stuff with them. I have a friend "Morgan" who is really exciting and awesome, despite not existing.

You also need to cultivate some interests and hobbies. This will make you a funner person to be around and help you assimilate into the social scene. Learn about art, the theatre, music, dodgeball....whatever. Start doing new stuff and going places and learning about your city. You really can't fake that part of it.
Author:  blankcd01 [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 2:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
What I do is just go out, find some dude thats cool. buddy up, find the cool places in town, find "your bar" and take her there.
Author:  puaninja [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 5:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
You need people and places. So yes, find some friends, or wings, or pivots, or whatever. Find some cool spots or some events you can go to. I recruited some wings off this site. I met up with one at this art fair thing downtown. We sarged and number closed some girls. I had a venue to find women and a wing to assist in that endeavor. That's all you need.

Admittidly your deal is a little different, becuse you already have a gf and you just need to make yourself more social proof in order to secure her as your gf and DHV yourself in her eyes. But the same principle applies, because the sarging environment is very similar to a dating environment. You also need to alpha yourself a little more and work on your inner game in that respect.
Author:  Fluffs [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 5:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the replies, but what I ment was:
I need to stay Alpha (in the conversation and the feel of it) while letting the girl give me the information of where could we go and what she wants. It's not a DLV issue (my value doesn't matter at all to her), it's more of how I feel with her issue. I already HAVE her, I just got scared I could lose her and by that lost control whenever I went Beta.

Nevertheless, this problem seems irrelevant for me anyways now. I can be whatever I want to be around her for all I know. I fixed a few issues with my inner game that had come back from the past and now I think I'm kinda fine.
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