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| direct, but not needy https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=135&t=146128 |
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| Author: | Lyrthas [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 9:45 am ] |
| Post subject: | direct, but not needy |
Hi Guys, this is my first post here and I want to ask for your opinion. I'm not doing much indirect game, because I like to make my intention clear. And my results are way better, when I can archive this by SHOWING her instead of TELLING her that I am interested. When you go direct you often have to tell her. When you show your interest they have to assume that you are interested, but when you tell them they know it for sure. And this causes my problem, that women often stop to invest when they know that they could get me if they want and I end up in a frame where I appear to be needy. I hate it when they first show interest and them back-off to let me do all the work. I often loose the initial attraction, because of chasing her. How do you guys keep a non-needy frame cases like this? At the moment I say something like "It's ok when you are not interested, we can stay friends". |
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| Author: | pumpington [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 9:51 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: direct, but not needy |
Quote: Hi Guys,
just have standards beyond ''she has to be good looking''this is my first post here and I want to ask for your opinion. I'm not doing much indirect game, because I like to make my intention clear. And my results are way better, when I can archive this by SHOWING her instead of TELLING her that I am interested. When you go direct you often have to tell her. When you show your interest they have to assume that you are interested, but when you tell them they know it for sure. And this causes my problem, that women often stop to invest when they know that they could get me if they want and I end up in a frame where I appear to be needy. I hate it when they first show interest and them back-off to let me do all the work. I often loose the initial attraction, because of chasing her. How do you guys keep a non-needy frame cases like this? At the moment I say something like "It's ok when you are not interested, we can stay friends". if the only idea of what you want in a girl is ''she has to be good looking'' then you have low standards, and it appears from your post that this is likely your mind frame, just because you tell her you find her physically attractive does not imply you are completely sold on her and beyond that, if you are indifferent (the opposite of needy), you will literally be willing to screen out girls and walk away, instead of clinging to the notion you have to get them, it's like a frame of screening, you are walking up to girls, letting them know they are qualified in terms of looks, then further probing with qualifiers to see if they are the kind of girl you want, if they are, cool you want to see them cause they seem like and awesome choice, if they are not, oh well, better luck next time girls, off to the next girl it's not some ploy to get every girl, it's seriously knowing what you are looking for, and being ok with a girl who fits that just as much as a girl who does not, being willing to walk away if she doesn't have a mutual interest in what you're looking for, and being ok with following through with your intentions when she does fall in line, just complete certainty and clarity of your own intent |
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| Author: | puaninja [ Tue Sep 18, 2012 1:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Don't say or do things that give the impression that you are expecting to be rejected. That's loser AFC stuff. You can be direct but not dwell on it. Tell her you thought she was pretty or had a radiance about her, but don't drown her in compliments hoping that you'll eventually win her over by sheer virtue of a showering her with praise. You need to work on push pull apparently, because you are pulling way too much. |
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| Author: | Hunter_Foxe [ Wed Sep 19, 2012 12:10 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Firstly, don't say "It's ok if you're not interested, LJBF" Secondly, if you have got multiple IOIs, number-closes and more importantly k-closes from these girls, there's no need to demonstrate a high level of interest in them so early on, your level of interest is already assumed, so there's no need to desperately tell them how much you like them. Women treat men like a computer game. If they know they could have you at the click of their fingers, their level of interest drops dramatically. By stating a high level of interest in them, you are playing their game. Choosing to be with you would be like buying a computer game but never getting past Level 1. Women want to be challenged, if you offer no resistance then they think a life with you would be compliant and boring. A bit of conflict is good because you can use it as leverage to introduce sexual tension. Save the compliments for when she is your girlfriend and you're in a secure relationship. Until then, you have to be prepared to walk away and don't give in until the game is in your favour and you call the shots. |
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