Assuming you've already built attraction and comfort with the girl, you continue escalating both until it comes to a point where she thinks "I really like him, I want him to myself." Let's not be naive, the purpose of a relationship is just to monopolize someone's intimacy. Which leads us to a corollary, there must be a feeling of anxiety so long as a relationship doesn't exist, and even while it does. There always needs to be potential for you to walk out or dump her for someone better. It sounds terrible, but it's the only way to keep a girl interested. Women want men that other women want to fuck, and other men want to be like.
If you passively sit on the sidelines and act all nice guyish while "waiting" for her to get comfortable enough to date you - you will erode away attraction and secksual tension. Date other girls and close other numbers while you're pursuing any one girl.
As for directly communicating interest in a relationship - never. You NEVER tell a girl you want to be exclusive with her. That's her job. The moment you do that, you do slip into dependency.
Nor do you tell her you like her, you communicate that to her subtly. If you TELL a girl you like her, you signal desperation. You tell her "You're the only one I want to be intimate with." When you SHOW a girl you like her, by flirting, by escalating, etc, you tell her "I am interested in you, but not enough to want to be exclusive." A sense of challenge must always be present. She must always feel the need to qualify herself to you.
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