PUA Forum :: She's Getting "Serious" With Another Guy

Well i very much appreciate your honesty. I think your a great guy.
We can always go out and hangout but i dont know if we will consider it a date because things are starting to become serious with me and alan again. Im starting to committ to only him.
And starting this week my life is going to go crazy.. college and work both start! ugh!
but we wil get together soon and hangout! your a great guy btw i like talking to you.

There's a big difference between a guy who knows how to game and a guy who's just an asshole.

Thanks for the reply, I appreciate your help. In response, I'd like to say that during our conversation during our date, she told a story about how a guy had taken her out a few months before and tried to get into her pants and she blew him off. I pretty much took that as I sign of her saying "not happening," and I'm fine with that because I'm not in it for the sex.

I call the guy a "douchebag" because, for example, he got drunk about a week ago and called her up saying how much he "loved" her and wanted to marry her, and when she asked him about the next say when he was sober, he laughed it off and went out with some other girl. I don't know why she's attracted to him, but that's a moot point. There's a big difference between a guy who knows how to game and a guy who's just an asshole.

Second, I'm more of a "visual" learner, so in order to understand what kind of approach to take, I would need some examples or maybe an outline of how to go about responding and taking the conversation.

So, I've been talking to this girl for a while now, even went out on a date with her about 2 weeks ago. A friend of ours is trying to hook us up. It went well and she even invited me out with her a few days later to head to the tattoo parlor to get her's touched up. The problem is that she's seeing another guy - She dated him for a while, and they've been on and off (mostly off) for about a month. He's kind of a douchebag and plays her a lot. I figured maybe this was my shot, so I swooped in and told her how I felt and such, but here's what I got in reply.

Quote:

I think I pretty much got friend-zoned. Haha I was wondering if there was maybe anything I could say in retort that would be interesting and maybe spark her interest a little more?

Usually when a girl says stuff like,"He tried getting into my pants but...".

Bullshit!!

Dont fall for it.

85% of the times,they're saying that for 1 reason:to convince you that she's not a slut.

Author:	Neomic [ Sun Aug 21, 2011 4:16 pm ]
Post subject:	She's Getting "Serious" With Another Guy
So, I've been talking to this girl for a while now, even went out on a date with her about 2 weeks ago. A friend of ours is trying to hook us up. It went well and she even invited me out with her a few days later to head to the tattoo parlor to get her's touched up. The problem is that she's seeing another guy - She dated him for a while, and they've been on and off (mostly off) for about a month. He's kind of a douchebag and plays her a lot. I figured maybe this was my shot, so I swooped in and told her how I felt and such, but here's what I got in reply. Quote: Well i very much appreciate your honesty. I think your a great guy. We can always go out and hangout but i dont know if we will consider it a date because things are starting to become serious with me and alan again. Im starting to committ to only him. And starting this week my life is going to go crazy.. college and work both start! ugh! but we wil get together soon and hangout! your a great guy btw i like talking to you. I think I pretty much got friend-zoned. Haha I was wondering if there was maybe anything I could say in retort that would be interesting and maybe spark her interest a little more?

Author:	PUA Kenny [ Sun Aug 21, 2011 8:26 pm ]
Post subject:
First off,change your mindset. Stop calling guys douchbags who's getting laid. He has/have the girl for a reason:he has game. You went on a date one but didnt lay her. She invited you out and you went. That sets the frame of her being the leader. You're the man;you should lead. This girl views you as a pussy since she's leading. She has no attraction for you. Why not? You ruined all possible attraction by "letting her know how you feel". Plus you come off as a nice guy. That douchbag she's running after has the stuff to attract her. You dont. What does he have? The badboy/jerk personality. In order for you to attract her,you'd have to become more like her jerk bf. That is your only shot. Keep up the nice-guy vibe and she'll only use you as her therapist when her bf plays her.

Author:	Neomic [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 11:17 am ]
Post subject:
Thanks for the reply, I appreciate your help. In response, I'd like to say that during our conversation during our date, she told a story about how a guy had taken her out a few months before and tried to get into her pants and she blew him off. I pretty much took that as I sign of her saying "not happening," and I'm fine with that because I'm not in it for the sex. I call the guy a "douchebag" because, for example, he got drunk about a week ago and called her up saying how much he "loved" her and wanted to marry her, and when she asked him about the next say when he was sober, he laughed it off and went out with some other girl. I don't know why she's attracted to him, but that's a moot point. There's a big difference between a guy who knows how to game and a guy who's just an asshole. Second, I'm more of a "visual" learner, so in order to understand what kind of approach to take, I would need some examples or maybe an outline of how to go about responding and taking the conversation.

Author:	MynameisFisher [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 1:34 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: There's a big difference between a guy who knows how to game and a guy who's just an asshole. Having a game and being an asshole are of course not the same, but they are compatible with each other. You are needy and that has ruined attraction already. Attraction doesn't work logically. She can't decide that 'Oh my bf is a douche I'm not going to be attracted to him anymore, but there is this really nice guy, so from now on I'm going to be attracted to him'. It's not like this. She just feels that she wants him and there is just nothing she can do about it. Him going out with other girls and playing with her just as he wants even doubles this. It shows that he is unaffacted by her, and that he can have all the girls he wants.

Author:	PUA Kenny [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 3:32 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Thanks for the reply, I appreciate your help. In response, I'd like to say that during our conversation during our date, she told a story about how a guy had taken her out a few months before and tried to get into her pants and she blew him off. I pretty much took that as I sign of her saying "not happening," and I'm fine with that because I'm not in it for the sex. I call the guy a "douchebag" because, for example, he got drunk about a week ago and called her up saying how much he "loved" her and wanted to marry her, and when she asked him about the next say when he was sober, he laughed it off and went out with some other girl. I don't know why she's attracted to him, but that's a moot point. There's a big difference between a guy who knows how to game and a guy who's just an asshole. Second, I'm more of a "visual" learner, so in order to understand what kind of approach to take, I would need some examples or maybe an outline of how to go about responding and taking the conversation. Usually when a girl says stuff like,"He tried getting into my pants but...". Bullshit!! Dont fall for it. 85% of the times,they're saying that for 1 reason:to convince you that she's not a slut. The more you tell me about her bf being a douchbag,the more I see he's a natural pua. He's driving her emotionally crazy. That's what any guy shuld be doing to a girl. Not that he has to go to the extent of proposing marriage and denying it when sober,but that's just an example of stuff that drives women crazy for a guy. That's why she's attracted to him. He gives her that rollercoaster ride/soap opera drama which you cannot give her.

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Author:	PUA Kenny [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 3:43 pm ]
Post subject:
@MynameisFisher-Great insight once again. There's a thin line between asshole and pua. Neomic is being way too needy.

Author:	Don Draper [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 5:08 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: She's Getting "Serious" With Another Guy
Quote: So, I've been talking to this girl for a while now, even went out on a date with her about 2 weeks ago. A friend of ours is trying to hook us up. It went well and she even invited me out with her a few days later to head to the tattoo parlor to get her's touched up. The problem is that she's seeing another guy - She dated him for a while, and they've been on and off (mostly off) for about a month. He's kind of a douchebag and plays her a lot. I figured maybe this was my shot, so I swooped in and told her how I felt and such, but here's what I got in reply. Quote: Well i very much appreciate your honesty. I think your a great guy. We can always go out and hangout but i dont know if we will consider it a date because things are starting to become serious with me and alan again. Im starting to committ to only him. And starting this week my life is going to go crazy.. college and work both start! ugh! but we wil get together soon and hangout! your a great guy btw i like talking to you. I think I pretty much got friend-zoned. Haha I was wondering if there was maybe anything I could say in retort that would be interesting and maybe spark her interest a little more? Well, that's the points of focus of your post. As you can see, they don't show you in a very flattering light. Quite the opposite, if I must say. Your words drip with need. Now, to the highlights: Just one date in how much ever time that you've know her signifies a lack on intent from her side. Obviously, you did not generate any interest whatsoever so that she might have been interested in another. Also, women aren't very comfortable with setups. A man who relies on setups is a weak man. The strong ones do these things by themselves. Well, the 'douchebag' obviously knows how to play her, because she just cannot get over him, as you mentioned with the whole on/off thing. Just because a guy is getting what you aren't, doesn't mean you have to resort to name calling. He's got a better game than you. Accept that, don't resent it. If anything, notice his stronger points and use them on her. Now, to her reply. That's just a polite way of saying, "I don't need your advice. I can handle my own business." and well, the whole "You're a great guy." is just said to soothe your ego. Spark her interest 'a little more'? A little more than what? She's got ZERO interest in you that way. Accept it. Be a man. Tell her : "Good for you. All the best for the relationship. Also, we cannot talk anymore. Goodbye." If she asks anything, don't reply. It is the best for everyone in this situations. You are NOT her buddy. Find other girls. She's not the only one on the planet.

Author:	MynameisFisher [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 6:20 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Usually when a girl says stuff like,"He tried getting into my pants but...". Bullshit!! Dont fall for it. 85% of the times,they're saying that for 1 reason:to convince you that she's not a slut. Exactly Seriously guys... Don't fall for cheap tricks like this. So obvious...

Author:	thebigtone [ Wed Aug 24, 2011 1:55 pm ]
Post subject:
I wish I hadn't wasted my time reading the first post now as all the advice I was going to offer has pretty much been covered. The only thing I disagree with a little is the idea of moving on, i'd keep trying but make it a 'background story', don't focus all your effort on her find other girls but keep trying this one. Tell her about your cool times when you met up with your mates and did x,y,z... and with you having her in the 'background' you'll come off a lot less needy. If/when you see IOIs start gaming it again with push/pull and don't completely divert your life to make it with her again. I often say i'm out on this day near you, i'll text you and you can come buy me a drink when I have no intention of being anywhere near. Then text her a good few hours before you are supposed to and say hey I ended up getting dragged to this bar (insert cool story) and won't be about tonight, another time if you're lucky (make sure she sees that as a joke). I did this EXACT thing with a girl recently who was just getting back with her BF and it really demonstrated the power of being cool and not being needy. She started with sending me texts about her going out and not being around so i 'backseated' her and just kept chatting. Giving her the line above about 'maybe' if i'm about. This started about a month ago and right now she is actually a massive pain in the arse and being FAR too needy. She texts me all the time and instead of lets maybe meet if you are about. I get a time, place, location, dress code and she checks like every 6hrs that 'we're still on'. I ended up taking her out and got an F-close and it's actually not got any better. The text ratio is about 6:1 and I really can't be bothered any more. so you see, she was having a cool time and not being needy and I was major keen on her. I realised there was other things on her mind, stepped back so I didn't appear needy and kept her informed of all the cool stuff I was up to and now she is ALL OVER me. Clearly she doesn't understand game and her needyness has just made me completely unattracted to her now. For note. i'd say she is a HB8.5. Good luck mate, Let us know how it goes. TT

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