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I'm 60 years old
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Author:  Bayern [ Mon Apr 11, 2011 8:55 pm ]
Post subject:  I'm 60 years old
Just kidding, but it got your attention. Which is the problem I face-

How to "hook" these fish when they're not in a proverbial barrel? Standing in lines, sidewalk conversations, at the store, etc- where she's got her own agenda. How can I draw her into my situation or insert myself into hers?

I am having trouble escalating- how can I get past smalltalk effectively and avoid the dreaded "Ok well, nice to meet you!" after 2 minutes?

I'm not asking for any step-by-step handholding, just point me in the direction of some solid guides to read or drop me a couple of hints.

Thanks- looking forward to this community.
Author:  tedwood [ Mon Apr 11, 2011 10:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
The best way to get past it is to simply give a statement even if she gives a short response. So if you ask her if she's a student and says a simple "yeah" make a statement about yourself when you used to be a student and studied business in the local area, you could then make a joke about her looking like a business woman and tease her.

Also don't worry about 'hooking' them just come across as confident and as though you don't give a shit and any opener will work fine, heck i've even seen guys say "I've just shit my pants, can I have your number?" and the girl would give it to him all because he had a confident frame.

P.s Don't use THAT line though, it was a joke :lol:
Author:  Bayern [ Tue Apr 12, 2011 3:42 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks- that's quite intuitive - I'll practice that soon.

What do you mean by frame? Solely body language and tone?
Author:  black_hat [ Tue Apr 12, 2011 11:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
frame is a tricky concept..

it's how you control the interaction.. for example a sexual frame is when you create sexual tension, talk about sex, look to her in a sexual way.
the frame is the whole way you show yourself in the interaction.. i think that's it.
Author:  marquito42 [ Thu Apr 14, 2011 3:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
i actually was wondering about how to continue after opening with something like....
floss before or after brushing?? (i really like this one from mystery)
i mean you wouldn't wann talk about mouth hygiene for the next 10 minutes
Author:  redmartin [ Tue Apr 19, 2011 9:28 pm ]
Post subject: 
I've personally find it easy to start talking to them in public transports. The girl sits in front of you. Then you look at her and smile a little. Keep the eye contact as though she was a million dollars. She will most likely blush and smile back.

Some examples: I ride the subway, a girl reading an interesting book I've read. I say.. "ah you are reading.. do you like it?"
Author:  redmartin [ Tue Apr 19, 2011 9:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
The best way to get past it is to simply give a statement even if she gives a short response. So if you ask her if she's a student and says a simple "yeah" make a statement about yourself when you used to be a student and studied business in the local area, you could then make a joke about her looking like a business woman and tease her.
I would say make a statement and then instantly follow up with a question. Like "yeah, I went to that school as well.. I studied business there.. you know I find that business is really one of these areas that teaches us a lot about life in general. Have you ever thought of that?"

I've been practicing different ways to lead the conversation in this way. It's really cool. I used to get into that "stale mate" situation a lot before when I would make a statement and it would be quiet and I would be like "fuck fuck fuck what did I do?? how do I get out of it??".. then I realized that I could avoid talking by asking questions and letting her tell me things instead. :D
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