Isolate
Qualification: This is the time to tell her about the things you value in girls / people in general. The point is to make her talk about herself in a way that shows she has those qualities. For example, if you're looking for a SNL, then you want to talk about friends you had or exes you had that were spontaneous, fun-loving, adventurous, didn't play by society's rules, etc. Tell some kind of story, and even hint a bit more at her by saying "yeah well we broke up but I still remember her well for the totally insane random adventures we ended up on together." This SHOULD make her tell a story about how adventurous SHE is, at which point you can ask pertinent questions about that, butt in (not too much) with relevant comments about similar things that happened to you, and so forth. The main focus is to get her talking about herself as much as possible, tease her a little bit, but mainly qualify her when she says something about herself that you actually find cool. Follow a compliment with a little IOD, e.g. "oh really? When we first met I wasn't sure what to think of you, but actually you're quite cool. Shame you're still a nerd for liking Justin Beiber
"This obviously leads right into deeper comfort stuff afterwards