PUA Forum
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

being sexual is my main cause of failure.
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=134&t=197254
Page 1 of 1

Author:  Pbblade3 [ Wed May 18, 2016 9:58 pm ]
Post subject:  being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Introverted and overthinking guy here, probably like most of the chaps.

Went to hungary last weekend to blow off some steam from work and decided to go all out. Never been a guy that is great with women but i did manage to convince myself to push my limits and i did. I've been following the PUA scene for a while but due too a very inconsistent lifestyle i keep dropping out for a while and pick it back up when i'm back in the same mindset.

Went out on my last night there and met a beautiful girl, was still getting into the mood by throwing down a couple of shots to loosen up while watching my friend pull a girl in within 3 minutes, pretty impressive.
A couple of minutes later he tells me a girl wants to dance with me so i joined in on the offer and introduced myself to her. Started dancing but it was akward as fuck cause i wasn't used to this type of stuff. Overthought that situation and never really expressed much sexual tension. I still had a good grip on the situation by expressing confidence and i was, but for some reason i couldn't push that one last final limit to close off the deal by expressing myself sexually, after the party i was 100% certain i could've f-closed that night. got clear indications that she was interested and took the situation half assed, grabbed her really close to me to dance, but never k-closed. ended up taking her back to the taxi while talking to her which was really nice, eventually sent her a message through facebook and got a really good response back meaning it wasn't as bad as i thought, but i'd still like to learn from my mistake and fully close it off next time.

I always overthink, not sure about how things will end up in case i do close and most importantly, i lack the sexual energy too have really cared about it.

the situation has given me the drive to finally hit the gym in hopes that the terosterone will help me develop a more sexual vibe but i'm afraid it will not be as i expected it to turn out.

How do similar people deal with these situations in a good manner? It's the lack of energy that blocks me off.

Author:  Dragula [ Wed May 18, 2016 10:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Adding testosterone won't make the move for you, just like NLP won't approach girls for you. You gotta be pro-active with the sticking points as they come.

So your closing skills needs improvement

What did I do?

I decided to go to a club and really push the boundaries, I made it a promise to escalate on every girl i talked to and I did that. It felt uncomfortable, of course it did, did i piss of a few girls? Sure I did, gotta break a few eggs to make an omelette

You can handle this sticking point within ONE weekend, but you gotta put in the sweat in

Now I am the point where escalating is much easier for me than actually talking to women (i tend to go in loud places)

Keep it simple. Focus on what's stopping you from getting laid and do not give up till you're competent

60 Years of challenge is the bible on this subject

Author:  Pbblade3 [ Thu May 19, 2016 5:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Quote:
Adding testosterone won't make the move for you, just like NLP won't approach girls for you. You gotta be pro-active with the sticking points as they come.

So your closing skills needs improvement

What did I do?

I decided to go to a club and really push the boundaries, I made it a promise to escalate on every girl i talked to and I did that. It felt uncomfortable, of course it did, did i piss of a few girls? Sure I did, gotta break a few eggs to make an omelette

You can handle this sticking point within ONE weekend, but you gotta put in the sweat in

Now I am the point where escalating is much easier for me than actually talking to women (i tend to go in loud places)

Keep it simple. Focus on what's stopping you from getting laid and do not give up till you're competent

60 Years of challenge is the bible on this subject
Wish i could just make that jump on command, that's the thing. I have a hard time convincing myself to just fully go for it. Times like these makes me wish i'd just be a simple guy loaded with hormones with nothing else in mind but unloading.

Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Thu May 19, 2016 5:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Quote:
Focus on what's stopping you from getting laid and do not give up till you're competent

Author:  Dragula [ Thu May 19, 2016 9:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Quote:

Wish i could just make that jump on command, that's the thing. I have a hard time convincing myself to just fully go for it. Times like these makes me wish i'd just be a simple guy loaded with hormones with nothing else in mind but unloading.
How many times have you physically made a move on a girl? Honestly?

If you can count then you simply have not put your balls on the line and done it enough

I had a good looking rich friend, his 1st impression was amazing with women, they'd be all over him, but he just never EVER made a move and he just never got laid and quit pick up. He was so close, the final missing puzzle piece was in his grasp, but he wasn't confident enough to the pull the trigger

You live once, get it done, get to work

Author:  LA.OC.Skater [ Fri May 20, 2016 4:49 am ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

I think a lot as well. What has worked for me is IDGAS. I don't give a shit. Most crap in your head is based on fear. Fear of failure, rejection, or the opinions of others. I plug in IDGAS, and all of a sudden, I am calm and confident. Don't even need to drink. Give that a try.

Author:  Pbblade3 [ Fri May 20, 2016 6:27 am ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Quote:
Quote:

Wish i could just make that jump on command, that's the thing. I have a hard time convincing myself to just fully go for it. Times like these makes me wish i'd just be a simple guy loaded with hormones with nothing else in mind but unloading.
How many times have you physically made a move on a girl? Honestly?

If you can count then you simply have not put your balls on the line and done it enough

I had a good looking rich friend, his 1st impression was amazing with women, they'd be all over him, but he just never EVER made a move and he just never got laid and quit pick up. He was so close, the final missing puzzle piece was in his grasp, but he wasn't confident enough to the pull the trigger

You live once, get it done, get to work
Yeah, you are right. I can easily count the moments i have physically escalated a girl. Often it's more suble then direct because i daygame a lot.
Being physical isn't really the problem for me, once i get the smallest sign from a girl that she's interested i'd put myself out there. Just not when it comes down to closing or being really sexual.
Learning to properly dance would uppen my game by quite a lot aswell, i should reconsider doing this aswell, most failures for me tend to be during clubbing where communication falls off quite easily.

Author:  Dragula [ Fri May 20, 2016 3:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Quote:
Quote:
Quote:

Wish i could just make that jump on command, that's the thing. I have a hard time convincing myself to just fully go for it. Times like these makes me wish i'd just be a simple guy loaded with hormones with nothing else in mind but unloading.
How many times have you physically made a move on a girl? Honestly?

If you can count then you simply have not put your balls on the line and done it enough

I had a good looking rich friend, his 1st impression was amazing with women, they'd be all over him, but he just never EVER made a move and he just never got laid and quit pick up. He was so close, the final missing puzzle piece was in his grasp, but he wasn't confident enough to the pull the trigger

You live once, get it done, get to work
Yeah, you are right. I can easily count the moments i have physically escalated a girl. Often it's more suble then direct because i daygame a lot.
Being physical isn't really the problem for me, once i get the smallest sign from a girl that she's interested i'd put myself out there. Just not when it comes down to closing or being really sexual.
Learning to properly dance would uppen my game by quite a lot aswell, i should reconsider doing this aswell, most failures for me tend to be during clubbing where communication falls off quite easily.

I find this is common to the guys who only do day game. They rely on verbal communication and they simply haven't had enough reps at escalation to be competent at it since escalating in the daytime from a cold approach is a much different dynamic than a club where the guys who are doing well with women, are using their NON VERBAL skills to meet women

I would recommend to have a few nights in clubs, make a promise to your self to not open verbally, only non verbal, then physically escalate

You can do this on or off the dancefloor, same process applies.

Last time I was in a loud place, I clinked my glass with a girl passing by, she reciprocated and then I pointed to the dance floor, lead her there and escalated physcially and it went well. It can be as simple as that. Non of this 'guessing where is from and what she does for a living bollocks that every daygamer does.

Try to be more animalistic, pretend you're a lion finding a mate, look at these sexy girls like you want to fuck them and LEAD like a trooper. This will change your life.

Get it done, you can tackle this sticking point this weekend if you wanted to by literally going from one girl to the next

Author:  Pbblade3 [ Fri May 20, 2016 4:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

@ dragula


I absolutely love your advice, im glad youre still holding onto this topic to help out, appreciated.
You are absolutely right about the club game in general, trying to talk is actually very ineffective and will probably mess everything up. When I met this girl I just shortly introduced myself and started dancing, after having to repeat my own name 3 times before she heard me I already knew holding a verbal convo would be pointless so I stopped doing so and only took on the challenge on a non-verbal level. Ill definatly use your advice for next time, its the same my mate who had that girl checked in within 3 minutes told me aswell, i saw it work very effectively and was still shocked and couldn't push myself for that same result he had. My friend and i plan to do this way more often together so im glad that he's with me, guy can still teach me a ton.

All in all i think my clubgame is not as bad as i expected, ive stayed in contact with the girl from hungary and she keeps sending me wall of texts explaining how much she enjoyed the evening and asks me if i plan to come back someday.

Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Fri May 20, 2016 4:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: being sexual is my main cause of failure.

Quote:
she keeps sending me wall of texts explaining how much she enjoyed the evening and asks me if i plan to come back someday.
They better be naked ones.

Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/