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Response to a maybe
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Author:  General Lamb [ Sun Dec 04, 2011 9:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Response to a maybe
Hello there,
Any help with this problem would be greatly appreciated :)

Basically I met up with a girl last weekend who I met on holiday, a nice little aquarium trip, followed by good food and a fair bit of wine, we ended with a kiss. Good so far.
Agreed to meet up again this weekend, this time I went to her house and stayed over, we watched DVDs, she cooked me dinner, and we kissed a lot.
When night came we didn't actually have sex on account of her being a virgin who wasn't ready for the pain (my finger wouldn't even fit) but we did do more or less everything else, and again upon waking up.
Anyway the next day I took her out for lunch before the drive back home, as I was about to leave and we were kissing goodbye, I asked if she fancied being my girlfriend, to which she replayed "mayyybe".

So that's the background, I'm unsure of where to go from here,
Should I carry on and pursue as normal as if I'd never asked the question?
Should I push for an actual answer?
Should I ignore her for a few days?
Or should I write her off as a fail and simply call it?

Thanks for the help :) It's so difficult to be objective about your own life!
Author:  LordCaine [ Sun Dec 04, 2011 9:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Response to a maybe
Quote:
Should I carry on and pursue as normal as if I'd never asked the question?
Should I push for an actual answer?
Should I ignore her for a few days?
Or should I write her off as a fail and simply call it?
She was interested, but unwilling to commit. It probably wasn't the right move to ask like that, so keep that in mind for next time. Its MUCH easier to kinda slide gracefully into the bf/gf relationship without drawing official lines.

But now that you've done that... apply a bit of "training" by pulling your affection and attention back just a tad. And then keep going as if you'd never asked. You were doing well. Keep doing what gave you good results, and it will build a habit.

Use positive reinforcement when she's responding to you. sensory rewards, like nice things to say to her, or pleasant caress.
Author:  General Lamb [ Sun Dec 04, 2011 10:09 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the response :)
You're absolutely right that asking her like that was not the right move, I should have known better... well I did know better, but whenever I like a girl in a "more than just fun" way I seem to ruin it with silly, avoidable schoolboy errors :/ how foolish!

Well hopefully this is salvageable, I'll cut contact for a couple of days for "training" as you say and also to allow the situation to reset, then I'll behave as I did before and see what happens :)

Cheers
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