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| Asking her out https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=134&t=121567 |
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| Author: | omri333 [ Fri Nov 25, 2011 6:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Asking her out |
Hey, So there's this girl that I got a chance to talk to her at this party (I helped her out, she got a bit drunk). Now, I know she likes me. Her friends told me that, and I can tell by how she behaves. I haven't really seen this girl since, but I'm pretty sure if I ask if she wants to do something she'll agree. (And I don't mind getting rejected anyways). I'm just scared of being alone with a girl I don't know that well. I'm terrified really. I don't know what to say, what to do.. It will probably be awkward and weird. I can talk to girls in parties and such, but when it comes down to being alone with a girl just like that, I freak out. Any suggestions on how to chill? How to be interesting? Anyone else with this situation? |
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| Author: | creddings [ Fri Nov 25, 2011 6:33 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Just the usual, the more time you spend in these situations the better you get at it, like anything else in life. The other idea is to confront your fear and realize it's no big deal. You're just hanging out with a girl and this is something in life that whether you are in a relationship or not, you will have to learn to do. Finally, over time you will probably get more comfortable with yourself and this will no longer be a problem. The more you get to know yourself, the more comfortable you are in your own skin. That's how it was for me anyway. Good luck! |
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| Author: | SeductMe [ Sat Nov 26, 2011 10:57 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Asking her out |
Quote: Hey, So there's this girl that I got a chance to talk to her at this party (I helped her out, she got a bit drunk). Now, I know she likes me. Her friends told me that, and I can tell by how she behaves. I haven't really seen this girl since, but I'm pretty sure if I ask if she wants to do something she'll agree. (And I don't mind getting rejected anyways). I'm just scared of being alone with a girl I don't know that well. I'm terrified really. I don't know what to say, what to do.. It will probably be awkward and weird. I can talk to girls in parties and such, but when it comes down to being alone with a girl just like that, I freak out. Any suggestions on how to chill? How to be interesting? Anyone else with this situation? I've been through it, this girl is so important to you that you feel that fear, so the bestthing i used to do is having this mindset "this girl is totally into me, I don't really need her, i'm just going out with her to see where this is going", and always remmeber you're not supposed to be entertaining her. yea making her laugh is cool, but she have to invest in the date. here are some things i used to have in mind when i used to be afraid of first dates: 1- Never rethink what you're saying and/or be always in your head analyzing what you said and what you're gonna say, just be spontaneous. 2- Ask her open-ended questions and you'll be amazed how much a girl can talk about her self, sometimes you'll have to cut her in order to have a chance to talk. 3- Don't be afraid of silence, if a silent moment comes, don't freak out, hold eye contact and smile, this puts a little pressure on her and creates sexual tension. (i sometimes i payfully tell her"Eww, stop it, you're looking at me like a kid looking at a lolipop"). 4- Apply some routines like cold reading, palm reading, magic tricks but try to make a smooth transition to it (for example: you notice her nails, comment on them, hold her arm, kino then flip her hand and just say "amazing! I can read your palm and it says....") When palm reading and come to the heart line i say "you'll meet a tall hot guy that you'll have couple dates with, marry him, have 2 kids then divorce after 4 years, and continue the rest of your lives alone and desperate", you guessed it, i'm 6"6. |
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| Author: | omri333 [ Sat Nov 26, 2011 3:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: 've been through it, this girl is so important to you that you feel that fear, so the bestthing i used to do is having this mindset "this girl is totally into me, I don't really need her, i'm just going out with her to see where this is going", and always remmeber you're not supposed to be entertaining her. yea making her laugh is cool, but she have to invest in the date.
The thing is, for once I don't even care about this girl. I'm hardly attracted to her, I really just want the practice (and I might be attracted to her int he future).I've always been in the situation you've mentioned and now I'm not.. and well it seems pointless, what's the point of going out with a girl that isn't that important to you? I've always been scared of getting close. The only relationships I've had lasted for a few weeks. It started out well. We were both into eachother, then I got scared, flinched and weird. I convinced myself that I never liked this girl or do, and I broke up with her and then regret it.. and get get jealous. |
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| Author: | SeductMe [ Sat Nov 26, 2011 5:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Quote: 've been through it, this girl is so important to you that you feel that fear, so the bestthing i used to do is having this mindset "this girl is totally into me, I don't really need her, i'm just going out with her to see where this is going", and always remmeber you're not supposed to be entertaining her. yea making her laugh is cool, but she have to invest in the date.
The thing is, for once I don't even care about this girl. I'm hardly attracted to her, I really just want the practice (and I might be attracted to her int he future).I've always been in the situation you've mentioned and now I'm not.. and well it seems pointless, what's the point of going out with a girl that isn't that important to you? I've always been scared of getting close. The only relationships I've had lasted for a few weeks. It started out well. We were both into eachother, then I got scared, flinched and weird. I convinced myself that I never liked this girl or do, and I broke up with her and then regret it.. and get get jealous. We're dealing with fear here, one of my friends was acting like you, he actually had commitment phobia, he fears to open up to people and get close to them emotionally. I myself was having this fear before my first serious relationship, I was "faking" game and had this poor ugly image of myself and was afraid that girls will find out the true me if i get too close to them , it seems irrational but i had this as a limiting believe kicking in whenever i talk deeply to a women. the best ego and self-esteem booster are facing your fears and accomplishing your goals, that's what you have to do in practice, specially with women.And always remember that handling this part of your life will make you a better person not only at PU. |
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