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| Dealing with LDR with my gf https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=98340 |
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| Author: | SuperMan™ [ Tue Aug 09, 2011 10:14 am ] |
| Post subject: | Dealing with LDR with my gf |
OK fellas so heres the deal. Ive been with my girlfriend now for 5months, and things are going really really well. Before I met her though she applied to study at uni in America. We both live in Ireland btw. She will be gone for 9months. Have any of you ever had any experience of something like this? We are both just back from holiday together and had a fantastic time in each others company. We have also had some pretty serious conversations about our future together. Im not interested in anybodies replies that say "It won't work" etc., ive no time for them. Just because it didn't work for you doesn't mean it won't work for me. Im well aware of the fact that its going to be hard, but I've every intention of flying out to visit her and breaking up our time apart into two more manageable chunks. Basically im just looking for any advice on how to make this work Thanks in advance |
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| Author: | H!j!nx [ Tue Aug 09, 2011 3:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
SPAM or Google+, anything that lets you webcam back and forth helps out tremendously. I'm in an LDR right now, and have been before. Me and my gf webcam regularly, and it is the closest thing you cna get to being there with them. |
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| Author: | SuperMan™ [ Wed Aug 10, 2011 9:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
yea SPAM will be used alot. Has anyone any positive experiences from this? Naturally I'm really really scared about this, and its crushing me to think that I may lose her shortly. I believe I have done everything I can to make these last 5months amazing for her (and me). I was talking to her last night, telling her how I was scared etc, and how I was planning on flying out to visit her in November/December, and then after Christmas sometime such as February so as to really break up the time we are apart. She responded to this by saying that we just have to take it one step at a time (which is fair enough, but not really what I want to be hearing). I really really want to make this work, so has anyone any other advice or personal experiences of this? Thanks |
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| Author: | afc__atticus [ Wed Aug 10, 2011 11:08 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I may be in this situation soon so I'm very interested to hear the suggestions you may get from people who have been through a LDR. Just a point which made me think following your post, do you think it wise to tell her that you're scared? I mean sure tell her that you'll miss her (without going overboard) but I think saying that you're scared makes it seem like you're a bit needy. Just a thought, try think of how an alpha would handle the situation. Good luck mate |
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| Author: | astartes2 [ Thu Aug 11, 2011 2:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I wouldn't even bother with a long distance |
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| Author: | VLCOSENT [ Fri Aug 12, 2011 5:51 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
My advice, Its difficult, but more interesting than a good book. Texts- There will be days when you send her a text and she will not respond within a timely manner, don’t get frustrated! In long distance relationships you ALWAYS have to be Alpha, if small things like not getting a response back start bothering you, you will turn into a complete WORRY WORM. It will kill you on the inside. When you do send her texts always play around with her, dont say " hey what’s up?" Instead, "Hey goober face, don’t be jealous, but im having our favorite tea while watching the sunset, you want some?" She of course will say "YES" and from there you start talking about your day. Random " I miss you" messages are always good (not to many). SPAM - Be fun and filled with interesting stories. Dont be that guy who almost breaks down with tears because you miss you so much. Instead, be confident with little negs here and there. Also try to have a designated time when you both get on SPAM. Say 9pm mon - thurs, then 1 am fri-sun. The time difference will be a challenge so work it out early. Dont get mad if she bails on you once in a while. Another idea is that you can have themes. Like a random Wednesday make it a Hawaiian theme, and dress up. Play games she likes over SPAM. If she brings her friends in on the conversation while skyping, MAKE SURE you get on there good side. If her friends like you and know who you are the harder it is for her to cheat on you. Letters- This may be the best thing you can ever do. Ask for her mailing address, and if you know when her "time of month is" send her a box of chocolates. Also, send her random love letter's (bring up memories you have with her), but HAND WRITE it on nice paper and spray the cologne you always wear on the paper. Never tell her you are sending it, let be a surprise. Its an adventure with out a doubt. At times you will be walking a fine line between wanting to tell her how mad and frustrated you are that she cant even respond to a text, and being the Alpah, I can get somebody else in a heart beat, way of thinking. To much of either will kill it. Hope this helps! Good Luck! |
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| Author: | SuperMan™ [ Mon Aug 15, 2011 12:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
thanks for the replies everyone, and VLCOSENT, real good advice, I really appreciate it. @afc__atticus - yea right now I do regret telling her that I'm scared. We had her leaving do recently and this morning at hers I did get quite emotional, I'm not going to deny it. We live about 2hours apart, so when I was travelling home I had a really good think to myself. I wrote down everything that I was thinking and realised that I had been quite selfish and only focusing on my own self-interests. So after I got back from work I rang her and told her about what I had been thinking, and how I had to catch myself on or the relationship was never going to work. I know I have to be really positive and not let things get me down. I'm only killing whatever attraction she has for me by getting emotional on her and making her feel guilty about going away for the year. I know myself these last few days Ive been acting real AFC, when I really should be confident. |
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