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| Opinion on LDR https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=96722 |
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| Author: | Apocalyptica [ Fri Jul 22, 2011 11:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | Opinion on LDR |
Hi guys * I met this girl while i was on erasmus. We were dating a couple of months, and had a really good connection. She is not the type of girl who gets drunk all day and fucks around. Yes, she had some adventures, but she's really a serious girl. I also trust her. * Now erasmus ends, we both made it exclusive a while ago. She goes to Spain, i live in Italy. It's 2 hours with (cheap) plane. * We will live apart for about 8 months. In these time, we can see eachother probably every month for about 4-5 days. * She's southern girl. Passionate and needs lot of affection. * She is ready to go to Italy when her studies end. I raelly have doubts whether this could work. I like this girl very much and don't want to lose her because of my fear that something wouldn't work. Apparently she really thinks this can work out. Yet, i wonder what will happen if she starts to miss my fysical presence. This girl isn't a flirt. We met for months before and got her to know in my social circle. Any opinions? thanks |
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| Author: | el_rubia [ Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
she sounds like shes interested now and willing to give it a go. Its up to you to decide whether or not you feel the same. LDR are hard, you need to decide if you are willing to put in the time and effort to organise the 4-5 days per month, and you need to decide how realistic it is that you will be together after the separation ends. If you decide that on both counts its worth it then give it a go. Just be aware that in a LDR you are just as tempted as she and can be made miserable easily. also be aware that EVERY girl enjoys male attention (obviously except lesbians) so even if shes not "a flirt" she will be hit on and she will like it. Just as you like it if a girl is into you she will too. So how much can you really trust her? How well do you know her etc. Im working through an LDR at the moment myself and it is hard, but it can be done. Its a similar distance to you and a similar situation. Just make the effort every day and book up visits early, that way they are set in stone and you KNOW when you are next seeing one another. Thats really important. I say if you like the girl enough give it a go, you might found out very quickly its not what you thought, or the distance might make you feel even stronger about her. Good Luck man. |
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| Author: | Apocalyptica [ Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:52 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for your comment. I might ask you; how many times you both see eachother? How do you deal with the lack of sex? Have you ever been tempted to cheat on her? |
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| Author: | Dalinkin [ Sat Jul 23, 2011 5:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I am in a similar situation. I've been dating a girl for almost a month now, and we live about 2.5 hours apart. What gives me hope is knowing that by September, we will both be back at school together. Her (at least I hope) and I are both trying hard to make this relationship work. It is really difficult, and towards the beginning I was finding it difficult to trust her for various reasons, but as time progressed, I honestly feel as though it is making us stronger. It is increasing our trust and also our desire for each other. AS far as me being tempted to cheat, hell yes I have been tempted numerous times. While we haven't had sex with each other yet, I have been tempted by several other girls, which makes it even harder. However, I have my own values, not just in this relationship, but in all my relationships. So while I am being loyal to her, I am also being loyal to myself. I feel as though honesty and faithfulness are two key aspects to a healthy relationship, which is what I want, and why I will never cheat. Yea, its difficult, but so are all things in life worth trying for. Also, since we moved apart 3 weeks ago, I have only seen her once for a day. I am visiting her this weekend for a couple days, and then she is gonna visit me in 2 weeks for my 21st birthday. And then I am hoping we can go backpacking and camping in August for a couple days before school starts up again. Good luck man. Stay strong and true to not only your girl, but yourself. |
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| Author: | el_rubia [ Sun Jul 24, 2011 1:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Thanks for your comment. I might ask you; how many times you both see eachother?
aim to see her once a month or so for atleast a few days.How do you deal with the lack of sex? Have you ever been tempted to cheat on her? The lack of sex isnt that tough, its tough at first and every now and again its frustrating to know you cant have sex for another 2 or 3 weeks or whatever but its fine really, it depends on your level of investment in the girl.... ive never even considered cheating on her to be honest, and ive had opportunities to do so, i kinda did (kissed someone else) right at the beginning of our relationship (before it was long distance, kinda as it was becoming exclusive) and i hated myself so much for it i just would not do it again. i am in this relationship out of love and a deep respect for the girl, its a type of feeling ive never had for a girl before and one which i believe is very rare. But i knew this before i accepted the long distance. its a trade off. you get less freedom and miss the girl alot, less sex and alot of effort to make communication work, but i know the separation will end eventually and i know that, atleast at the moment, we value one another highly enough to make it work. But you have to decide that sort of thing early. if you arent there then the distance is likely to kill things. Its a shame but im afraid its probably true. |
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