Long read, but I feel as though it is all necessary so please bear with me guys.
So this summer, I took a university course out in Wyoming (I'm from Michigan) and one of the girls whom I met out there gave me strong IOI's from day one. I started to get to know her and kept up the flirtatious vibe and one night I finally made a move and it went great. After that, We would sneak into the abandoned cabins each night to have our own place, and we did just about everything but sex. Her and I both agreed that although we aren't virgins, we both weren't ready to have sex this soon. I pushed her sexual boundaries each night, but still respected that she wasn't ready for sex. Was this the right move?
Anyways, as things between us started to pick up, I found out that:
>She hasn't been in a serious relationship since freshman year HS (she is now a sophomore in college). That relationship ended when her BF cheated on her, so she hasn't trusted guys since.
>The guys she used to be interested in are nothing like me. It sounds like they were the "bad boys" who dropped out of hs, did drugs, got kicked out of their homes and didn't treat her well. I'm not like that in any way. I wouldn't consider myself a nice guy, but I'm not a bad ass haha.
>>(This is a big one) Before coming out to WY, she was sort of "seeing" someone. The only reason she called it seeing someone was because she was talking to this guy for 5 months which she never does. Also, he lives out in Cali, so it wasn't much of a relationship. And according to her, I know 100x more about her than he does, and they know nothing about each other. It wasn't serious, and even if nothing happened between her and I after camp, she was done talking to him. However, this is the guy she lost her v-card to, and he is now transferring to our school in the fall. (I am not too worried about this guy and trust that she is done, but is this a bad sign? Should I trust that she is done? I told her that faithfulness in a relationship is huge to me and that I wouldn't continue with her if it was a serious relationship. I believe that if she will cheat for me, she will cheat on me. She stressed that it wasn't a serious thing and that there wasn't anything between them really.)
Her and I both agreed that we had strong feelings towards each other and that we didn't want this to end once camp was over. One night, we sort of talked about what would happen after camp and I stated that maybe we should see how things go over summer and just let them play out, and once the fall comes and we can see each other again, and maybe pick things back up. She disagreed and stated that yea, it will be tough, but it's only 2 months and that she didn't want to just wing it. If we are to do this, we will do it, and not half ass it. (I liked that belief). She told me numerous times that she really liked me, and she normally didn't feel this way towards guys. She also trusted me a ton, which she apparently never does.
So the end of camp came, and things continued to build between us. It was our last night together, and I basically told her that I wanted to be in a relationship with her, it would be stupid if I just said well thats that, and even if it was hard, I wanted to put forth the effort. I said what I wanted out of it, which I feel is a good thing. I then asked her that when she was "seeing" that guy, if they were exclusive and she replied that they both dated around, but that she wanted us to be exclusive. She reminded me how much she likes me, but said that I will have to bear with her during this time (??) Was it a bad idea to ask about the two of them?
The problem:
So here I am, I haven't seen her since we got back (~2 weeks) and she is a terrible texter. She warned me that she was bad at texting and usually takes a few hours to respond and boy was she right. I will text her something, and I won't get a response for at least 2 hours or more. She seems like a busy girl, and I'm a busy guy, but I am starting to wonder if this shows a lack of interest. Also, I'm still kind of new to this relationship thing, so should I ever ask about that one guy she was "seeing"? I feel as though I can really trust her, but when the fall comes, what should I do if they start hanging out together. I have hung out with my ex since Ive been back and nothing has happened, so I guess I'll have to trust her in return. However, I feel like its the guy who makes the move and I can't trust him. I don't feel as though this is fair though. I can hang with my ex, but she can't hang with hers? How should I handle this.
Also, I realize that I may have rushed into things with her but we saw each other literally every day for 3 weeks and spent many nights together. We both agreed that 2 months apart isn't that bad but how can I keep the intensity/interest/passion there? I don't want to always be the one calling or texting her, but if she isn't making the effort since she isn't used to being in a relationship, then the feelings may fade. Also, how can I freeze her out or get her interested in me, since she is used to being independent, I feel as though if I stopped talking to her, she would just lose interest completely.
Did I screw up with getting into a relationship this soon? Was I just used to get over that one guy? Those are just some thoughts running through my head. I realize that they are AFC, so how can I go about not having them or not worrying about them in the future.
Thanks guys
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