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| How to handle cheating https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=92790 |
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| Author: | Nova Casanova [ Tue May 31, 2011 7:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | How to handle cheating |
Hey guys, This girl I've been busy with for over a month now, and whom i have kissed for 2 times now, when she went out she kissed some other guy i didn't not. I know this because a close friend of mine was with her when it happened, and he instantly texted me. What should i do? Address her and telling her what i think about it? Ignore her? Pretend like i don't care? Help me please, thanks. 
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| Author: | adonis_boy [ Tue May 31, 2011 8:24 pm ] |
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You say you have been seeing her for 1 month. Is she your girlfriend? If not, you don't have any right to control who she is kissing. |
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| Author: | Mack 2.0 [ Tue May 31, 2011 11:04 pm ] |
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does she have a sister? |
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| Author: | cedius [ Wed Jun 01, 2011 4:39 am ] |
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1 month...2 kisses? If you two have not established a relationship...as in, she isn't "TECHNICALLY" your girlfriend, then you can't say or do anything about it...well, you can...but that's just going to make you look needy and creepy...you'll pretty much blow yourself out then! You want her, step it up...and I don't mean...4 kisses in a month...I think you know what I mean! 
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| Author: | afc_gone [ Wed Jun 01, 2011 9:20 am ] |
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Before you comit, you gotta hit! And she isn't your girlfriend if you kissed 2 times. So to prevent her from doing this things, you should step up and go all the way. Then if she still does it, adress it and leave her! |
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| Author: | Danzella [ Wed Jun 01, 2011 9:34 am ] |
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You've kissed 2 times in a month? It definitely sounds like you're confused about where you are in the relationship. I kiss my girlfriend WAY more than 2 times in just one day, let alone in a month. But to answer your initial question, if my girlfriend cheated on me I'd end the relationship dead, right there and then, and head off to find a girl who wont cheat on me. |
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| Author: | Nova Casanova [ Wed Jun 01, 2011 5:18 pm ] |
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Hey guys, thanks for all the comments. There might be a misunderstanding here i later thought of. In my mother language, which is dutch, the phrase 'to be busy with someone' is used to describe a phase always before the beginning of a relationship. A phase in which you are both trying to find out whether you have a match. In this phase it is not appropriate, or let's say extremely uncommon, to kiss other people then the person you're 'busy with'. Btw, I dont want, and never wanted to control who she's kissing. I'm just stating that the fact that she did this tells something about the way she looks at things. I like the way you recommend me to step up, so that's what I'm gonna do. (Big party coming up this weekend) I also agree with cedius that when i will keep talking about this it's gonna make me look creepy. Thanks guys. :d |
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| Author: | Lodewijkp [ Wed Jun 01, 2011 9:00 pm ] |
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Quote: does she have a sister?
LOL ...... never let mack into your family
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| Author: | Rye Lee [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:10 am ] |
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I don't think it works very well to talk to people about how they act or how their actions make you feel when you are just getting things started. Instead I talk about my beliefs and rules I have for myself in situations (preferably before they occur so you aren't correcting her, she knows ahead of time how you'll feel and react when she does something a certain way). Maybe her belief is that until you declare it a relationship or have sex or something, then "playing the field" (seeing several people) is acceptable. One of the Mods who used to be on here (The Doctor) told me that he made a rule where he told girls that if he started seeing a girl and they smoked, that if they desired to keep seeing him that he didn't date smokers. He said several girls quit smoking because of this and not because he told them to quit smoking, but because he wouldn't date a smoker and they wanted to be with him. I won't be with girls who expect me to be monogamous and they can either accept it or not be with me. You can tell girls that you're turned off by the idea of girls you kiss making out with random guys and that if they want to kiss you you expect they won't kiss other guys or you'll stop seeing them. They'll either do as you want, or they won't, but at least there's confusion and if you hear she's been kissing other guys then you dump her cause she violated your rules. It can be hard to start doing, but once you make your principles this clear to people, they'll either get in line or they'll walk away and they won't waste your time. |
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| Author: | Mack 2.0 [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 9:50 am ] |
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good advice, rye lee. i can see where following this will help me in the future. |
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| Author: | Satir [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 10:41 am ] |
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If she cheats she's out, end of discussion! |
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| Author: | Nova Casanova [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 5:17 pm ] |
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Quote:
If you really cared about a girl kissing other guys you could make her your girlfriend.
I'm sure I could, but I don't really have an idea why.Rye Lee, you comment was very enlightening. It really cleared things up about how I would want to deal with this situation. And for your information: Out of nothing she texted my this afternoon 'Hey, I really wanna talk with you because I really made a big mistake and I want to make up with you. I hope that you will at least accept my apologies'. First she wanted me to come to the park she was currently sitting in with a female friend of her, but I told her to come to my house. This because she wanted to talk to me firstly. Unfortunately I read your new comments when she had already left. But we were both relieved that everything's cool between us again and I'm like 80% sure she truely regretted her actions and for the other 20% itt might be that it didn't work out with that guy or w/e. We'll see what the future brings! Thanks again guys! |
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| Author: | Rye Lee [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 8:44 pm ] |
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Quote: Quote: You can tell girls that you're turned off by the idea of girls you kiss making out with random guys
If you really cared about a girl kissing other guys you could make her your girlfriend.Otherwise, you must be kidding with the ridiculous double standard. I use the same reasoning and way of discussing my own beliefs based on the things that I learned from an amazing mentor of mine Johnny Soporno. That guy has it made in the shade I tell ya, so I spent years trying to figure out how to express his concepts based on my own beliefs and values and once I did that I started getting everything I ever wanted. I tell girls that I believe sex is an amazing thing that I enjoy sharing with anyone I feel a powerful connection with, I don't have one night stands and I won't have sex with a girl if I don't plan on seeing her again or if she isn't planning on seeing me again (except in those unavoidable circumstances that sometimes happen when you'll never see someone again for other reasons). I refuse to be tied down to one girl, I expect girls not to rely on me as their sole emotional or sexual partner because I've got others and I don't have the time to always be with them. They have to use protection with other people just as I do. A very important one that people often don't pay enough attention to is that they have to do their best to get along with all the other girls. They either agree and want to experience the fun and freedom I offer, they say they're not interested but they respect my openness and honesty, or they leave me alone and I don't have to waste time trying to see if they might be interested. I always worried that girls would be repulsed and tell me I was a horrible person...most actually wish that they were treated with as much respect and given as much freedom to live however they desire. |
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| Author: | MLTR [ Wed Jun 08, 2011 5:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How to handle cheating |
Quote: Hey guys,
Don't pretend you don't care...This girl I've been busy with for over a month now, and whom i have kissed for 2 times now, when she went out she kissed some other guy i didn't not. I know this because a close friend of mine was with her when it happened, and he instantly texted me. What should i do? Address her and telling her what i think about it? Ignore her? Pretend like i don't care? Help me please, thanks. Just don't care. Date someone else, I can see this hurt you, find a girl that has stronger morals. |
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