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My situation is f$%ked up.
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=77079
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Author:  Consistence [ Sat Oct 16, 2010 7:39 am ]
Post subject:  My situation is f$%ked up.

Me and my gf moved in together during summer, and moved to a place far away from old friends and family. We have been together for 1,5 year and our relationship is going downhill. I think we are going to break-up in next to no time, and I will now explain why my situation is fucked up.

We have started on an economical study and our new social circle is quite small. My gf has started to flirt with the guys in it, and they are not holding back, even though they know she has a boyfriend. Some of them are PUAs so fair play to them.

If we break-up I know for a fact that she´s going to have sex with some of them, and probably get into a relationship after a while. My gf has never been single lol. Furthermore, I am going to see her every day during classes and when we are hanging out with friends-because we are in the same friend-group. And it is so typical that the "other" people in our class is going to feel sorry for me because of what she´s doing to my friends (yes, the boys in our social circle, is hitting on her). So how do I come out of this situation the best possible way? I have thought of a few things...

- Don´t care if she is being hit on by the guys in my class. We are not together anymore so she is free to do whatever she wants. Same goes for me.
- Going to flirt with other girls and practise my game again. I am actually looking forward to this.
- Move out, and not move in with a girl for a looong time, lol.
- Stop contacting her on facebook, myspace etc. She will always take the initiative, but should I answer her like a friend or like a person who don´t care at all, like short answers and stuff?
- We are still going to be in the same social circle so how to behave? Really need advice on this one.
- Get on with my life (do excellent in studies, train etc)

Hope you can help me out guys. This is a sad situation.

Author:  Grunty [ Sun Oct 17, 2010 2:11 am ]
Post subject: 

If you do choose to break up with her, don't burn bridges. Since you're keen to practice your game again, keeping a large social circle should be a high priority

Author:  Vietman100 [ Wed Oct 20, 2010 8:18 pm ]
Post subject: 

It sounds like you've already given up on the relationship. Do you not care about it anymore or do you want to try and patch things up? If you've already given up, then there's no point in staying with her.

Author:  ariana [ Sat Oct 23, 2010 1:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My situation is f$%ked up.

ok this might be a bit of a radical idea, but maybe you need to think about the possible reasons why yr gf is flirting with your mates

there are some possible reasons why she would do this that do not necessarily mean your relationship is doomed (unless you want it to be) :

1. she is bored because you and she just hang around with the same tiny group of mates doing the same stuff all the time and not doing anything fun any more ie you have got into a rut
2. she is (consciously/unconsciously) trying to make you a bit jealous/notice her mostly for the same reaons as above - attention seeking
3. you are not paying her attention and making her feel special and attractive like you did at the beginning of your relationship - do you pay her less attention now you 'have her' than when you were trying to 'get her'?? - do you take her for granted? when she gets ready and asks you how she looks do you make her feel gorgeous? is she feeling unappreciated?

suggest you and she, both together and individually, start to broaden your social circles

also, you and she need to do more fun things together as a couple (not with your mates) so you are not in a rut and remember why you liked each other to start off with - this includes going out fun and staying in fun - it doesnt include watching top gear together btw -

finally flirt with her and make her know you appreciate her, and make her feel special , because sure as eggs is eggs, if you dont do these things, there is clearly a queue of guys waiting to do what you cant be bothered to do anymore

talk to her - do not be aggressive or accusatory, but tell her how you feel - this is always a good plan, and then, even more important, listen to her - then you know how she feels, and she knows you care how she feels, if you dont listen to her, then she will look for someone else who will listen, even if its just to get in her panties

if trying all the above does not work, then split up with her, and broaden your social circle, get a life, throw yourself into it 110% and move on

Author:  Consistence [ Sat Oct 23, 2010 6:53 pm ]
Post subject: 

Update... I was at a friends house from yesterday to today and talked with my girlfriend today.

She said she had been missing me and that she now understood that she takes our time and me for granted, but after me being gone, she miss me more than she has ever done. She asked me what I have been doing, and I did the same to her, and she said that she was out partying yesterday. She said that she didn´t hope I got angry because HE was dancing dirty with her and people might tell me that tomorrow. She also said that he was at our house and they took a coffee. I dunno... I trust her, but it is tempting to break-up, however, after getting the advice above I don´t know. Comments please. I will decide tomorrow.

Author:  ariana [ Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:09 am ]
Post subject: 

hmm still sounds to me like she still wants to be with you, cares about you and wants you two to be together, but is a little bit bored with your relationship and is letting you know there is someone else who is paying her attention.
even though she isnt necessarily initiating it or 'cheating' she certainly isnt 'discouraging it', and is even volunteering to you information that this other guy was round for coffee - so letting you know that if you dont want her, someone else is interested?
so i think from what you said you are right to trust her, so if you do? then pay her more attention and dont take her for granted either, i think when she admitted that she took you for granted, perhaps she was hoping that you would agree that you do that too!! so make a plan to do plenty of fun stuff together so her focus is on you and not anyone else and stop worrying so much about what all the 'other' people think;
but if on the other hand you do care more about what other people think of you, than you do about this girl, and if there is no trust there for whatever reason, then she clearly is not the 'one for you' and you both would be best moving on..?

Author:  Grand Master [ Sun Oct 24, 2010 10:50 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
i think when she admitted that she took you for granted, perhaps she was hoping that you would agree that you do that too!!
WOW!! That is some insight. I would have never thought of that. :idea:

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