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| LDR advice and comments welcome. https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=69205 |
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| Author: | nemosaurus [ Mon Jun 14, 2010 9:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | LDR advice and comments welcome. |
Been dating this girl for about 6months now during school but now its summer and we've gone home to our separate states for a few months. I feel like we've both invested too much to just let things go. I like her and i want to see where things will go in the future. Just wondering if anyone has any ideas of how to keep things fresh in a long distance relationship. Thanks guys, Nemo |
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| Author: | Prince_ [ Mon Jun 14, 2010 10:02 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
how far away. if your not visiting her weekly it will be hard to make it work. |
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| Author: | Blind_Oh!_bed_ience [ Tue Jun 15, 2010 2:43 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I’ve been there Nemo and it can be challenging, hard to accept?, but that word best describe LDRs. Bear in mind that the word is challenging, not impossible. LDR’s takes away the ability to see each other freely, as well as the choice of being intimate when desired, not to mention the major trust issues. Agree on a time to end the distance You should first agree on an end goal with your Gf -- a specific time, “we've gone home to our separate states for a few months”- when is the separation is going to end? Will you be back at school together? Otherwise, you may end up stringing along the status quo indefinitely, breeding a particularly robust strain of frustration. Schedule contact time The quality and quantity of verbal communication with your woman will need to increase substantially when you start your LDR. Be prepared for this increase in verbal game. You might want to switch to a new mobile phone plan ( Cell phone) with a network that offers a good deal like unlimited talk time to a nominated user. Talk time availability is important, find out when the best times are to call her and let her know when is the best time to reach you. Make time as if you were meeting up in person, take notes of important info and schedule using a calendar. If you have to miss a date let her know before hand (prevention is the best remedy). Bridges are especially easy to burn from so far away. Try closing the gap with video chat, such as SPAM.com Schedule visits Visits, like a weekend together is vitally important at least once every six weeks. SPAM hasn’t finished developing it’s touch and smell chat plug in yet. Smell is the strongest sense tied to memory, you’ll want to keep up physical relations during long-distance relationships. A trip to visit shows you care, no matter how far away she is. When you visit try to find some activity to do so you’re not just visiting and hanging out at the shopping centre like an uncle. Raise your trust level Trust is a major requisite to continue your relationship from a distance. Without trust and honesty, the relationship is in for danger, just as it would have been the 6 months leading to this LDR- even though you are put in this position by external factors you still must decide on accepting the challenge of a LDR, you both must accept the fact that you will have to have the trust and faith that your partner will not be seeing anyone else as promised. Paranoia and accusations will only grow doubts between you and none of those feelings will help the relationship survive successfully. Keeping each other informed of the friendships from your circle and the events that taking place in your personal life is a great way to keep your partner a part of your life. Stories will begin to revolve around people you’ve never heard of and she’ll begin to take on certain characteristics you won’t recognize. Your role will change slightly as well. It’s not an attack against you, so try not to show too much jealousy. LONG-DISTANCE LOVIN' When it comes to long-distance relationships the name of the game is prioritising what’s important to the both of you. If it’s family or a relationship that you find occupying the top spot, great, but you’ll have to sacrifice your other interests a little bit. If you are both career-oriented people and can put your relationship on the back burner for a while, then a long-distance relationship may be for you. It’s all about weighing the ups and downs associated with what you want from your life |
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| Author: | Defiance [ Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Deep pretty much touched up on the major points. I was in an LDR with my current girlfriend for a good half a year. As Deep mentioned trust is a huge aspect and don't let irrationality take over because it will destroy your relationship. And to help out, don't keep her out of the loop. Keeping her posted with small things that you might think are irrelevant is a great way to keep her "close" and you should inquire about small things from her life. Also, care packages. Write her a letter or send her a little box full of things. Things like that are also exciting especially if you don't tell her about it. Who doesn't like getting packages? Things like that will show her that you are still thinking about her. Picture messages. Fantastic way to keep your loved one interested physically. Make it a game and tell her that you're in the lead with pictures and that she stands no chance. Make her think of you sexually by sending provocative texts when you know she's in class or somewhere boring. She will be crawling out of her skin with excitement and anticipation. |
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| Author: | nemosaurus [ Tue Jun 15, 2010 7:44 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Ha thanks for the advice guys it means a ton. We're gonna be back together in like 2 months, I'm flying out to see her in alaska in 2 weeks. If we weren't going back to school together soon there's no way I'd keep the relationship going. But she's in alaska so its a $700 plane ticket or 3 days of straight driving, or there'd be more visits. We've had a few phone dates so far, tried SPAM but her computer is broken. She says she feels weird sending pictures of her self. Any ways I could break that down or get around that? We trust each other completely, and it's one of the weirdest feelings ever. I know i should be jealous or a little worried when she goes camping with a mixed group of girls and guys but I never am. I'll send her a little care package sometime soon, I like that idea. Thanks you guys for all the help.You're awesome. Keep it coming! |
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| Author: | TheInventor [ Tue Jun 15, 2010 7:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
You can talk to her by SPAM. |
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