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Thinking of leaving the country - not my boyfriend
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Author:  Lips_and_Hips [ Thu May 13, 2010 4:51 am ]
Post subject:  Thinking of leaving the country - not my boyfriend

Hi guys,

I have a little dilemma on my hands, which I have not yet spoken about to my boyfriend. I kinda need some advice on how to break this to him and where we go from here.

A little background history - there was a time a few years ago when me and my bf (then just friend) were about to become a couple but he pulled back saying he didnt want to hold me back in my travel plans and it would be too hard for us to be together and then all of a sudden I would leave - basically told me I would break his heart.

Fast forward 3 years and we have been in a comitted relationship for 2 years. I love him absolutely and to the end of time. I would marry him and stay with him forever. BUT I am much younger than him and it has always been in my plan to travel and work overseas. I may be ready to be a wife but not yet ready to be a mother or anything. I did not intend on falling so deeply in love with this guy and I know that he doesn't want to be holding me back from the things I want to achieve in my life. He has already let me go into the career I wanted (which means we now see much less of each other due to my hectic schedule) because he knows it's what I want from my life. However, when I brought up the idea of moving away early on in our relationship (we had been together about 4 months), he just wantewd to avoid it and told me not to talk about that sort of stuff yet because it wasnt about to happen right?

Now the time has come where I am getting restless and wanting to get out of my hometown where I have lived my entire life. My sister has just moved overseas to pursue her career and I really want to do the same (I can't really properly escalate my career here as there is more of a market and more oppurtunity for it in other countries). I am all geared up and ready to catch the flight to take me to my destiny except for one thing which is holding me back. My gorgeous man. And he would HATE to know he is holding me back. I am in turmoil because the most perfect thing in the world would be for him to come with me, but he has his own things going on here and I don't want to pressure him into coming with me.

I desperately do not want to break up with him, but I don't believe a long distance relationship would work because I would miss him too much and would not be able to see him. I only want to stay away for a couple of years and then settle down back home. I have spoken to my mother about this and she tells me that I should travel and if it's meant to be, me and my man will be re-united and together forever. I understand that - I just don't want to be away from him for 2 years.

Anyone ever been in a similar situation? Or know how to handle it? I am so confused!

Author:  Lips_and_Hips [ Thu May 13, 2010 5:45 am ]
Post subject: 

Thanks for that advice Hobbit.

I know I cant not do it just for him because that's not what he wants and I would always be wondering what if.... I will speak to him about it.

Thanks so much!

Author:  LiveDateSearch [ Wed Jul 14, 2010 1:44 pm ]
Post subject: 

Dear Girlfriendofapua, I understand you, because I have the same situation. I hope that your decision was wright

Author:  Raphael.Phoenix [ Sat Jul 24, 2010 6:48 pm ]
Post subject: 

Long distance never works...

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