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she met a friend.....should i be angry ?
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Author:  arnolfo [ Sat May 01, 2010 10:05 am ]
Post subject:  she met a friend.....should i be angry ?
hi
i have a problem with my girlfriend right now.
she lives in austalia and i live in another continent and i'll see her in three months.
She told me that one week ago she went out with a guy that she knew since years even if
they don't know much each other...they have been in a bar,drink something had a conversation and
that's it.she told me this as it was a normal thing...she just met a friend..she wasn't in a date
i don't know what to do.
my instintive reaction would have been to be angry but i resisted and i remain calm....we
live far and the distance is a problem...if i argue with her every time....there is a possibility
to broke up.
i have this doubt and this two options:
1) even if nothing happen and they are friend she have been in a bar at night just her and another
guy.....he can easily try to seduce her.
at least she should have tell me this in advance and ask if i was ok with that...she was unrespectable
she is my girlfriend i should be angry for what she did and clarify to her that this
don't have to happen anymore

2)she just met a friend.nothing happened....if i don't let her meeting her friends is too much
i'm acting too jelous
Author:  Glint [ Sat May 01, 2010 12:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey i can say two things here, one will help, one won't. And just hold on to something because i'm brutally honest sometimes.

The last five girls who iv'e hooked up with in have been in serious relationships. (I know right? fml)

A more useful fact, nothing happened, but he would have been breaking his arms trying to make it happen, and it does your head in if you think about it.

Your in a long distance relationship. I respect that, a lot actually. Any man putting himself through that deserves respect. I seem to like you, you remind me of me.

Don't think about it, and do some picking up without any intentions to actually park your shoes under her bed, it will do you good. Make new friends.

P.S. Don't get mad. Get even. :D
Author:  Jay-Dawg [ Mon May 03, 2010 12:35 am ]
Post subject: 
Only you would know if she cheated or not.

But chances are high really...
seriously, even "good girls" will lie...
I've seen it...

This is exactly why relationships suck. Especially long distance.

I guess if you can't trust her, that shows me that you're really not in a good relationship to begin with. You have some insecurities, that's ok (who doesn't?). But has she cheated before? If not, don't show any insecurity.

The more nervous/uptight you get, she'll see that and you'll get walked all over. In my experience...

Ironic: I know a girl who went to Australia, named Casey, total Bitch, anyways she dumped her BF before she left, so she could lay some other dude, after dating her BF for like 2 years :(

Yeah...women....
Author:  LexLuthor [ Tue May 04, 2010 9:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
Is she away for a wee while or is it a constant long distance relationship?
Author:  thelenzel [ Wed May 05, 2010 9:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
To be honest.
You don't even have the RIGHT to get mad. She has a life outside of you, and so should you. If you "deny" her the right to see her friends, you WILL get dumped. Just make it clear that you're ok with her seeing a friend, but also make it clear that you're not an idiot that will act as if nothing happened if she cheats on you.
Stand your ground but don't become a possesive jerk.
Be grateful that she told you! She could have NOT told you and you would've never found out!
Author:  yassay [ Wed May 05, 2010 10:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
BRO!!!
I'm in the same situation... diff continents... and i'm starting to go crazy... period. :S
Author:  arnolfo [ Thu May 06, 2010 10:27 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Is she away for a wee while or is it a constant long distance relationship?
she is away for some months.....but is not a constant long distance relationship
Author:  arnolfo [ Thu May 06, 2010 10:31 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
To be honest.
You don't even have the RIGHT to get mad. She has a life outside of you, and so should you. If you "deny" her the right to see her friends, you WILL get dumped. Just make it clear that you're ok with her seeing a friend, but also make it clear that you're not an idiot that will act as if nothing happened if she cheats on you.
Stand your ground but don't become a possesive jerk.
Be grateful that she told you! She could have NOT told you and you would've never found out!
i don't deny to see her friends.....but i'm pissed if she just meet another guy alone.
how should i act to make her understand that i'm not an idiot and she can't do whatever she wants without making me angry.
she has to understand that she can't treat me bad....the problem is that is hard to show strenght because of the distance....if she was here was easier.
Author:  Little Panda [ Thu May 06, 2010 11:56 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
how should i act to make her understand that i'm not an idiot and she can't do whatever she wants without making me angry.
You clearly got some inner game issues.

YES, she can do whatever she wants.
NO, you don't have the right to set a barrier of what she can/can't do.

It's all in your head. You gotta work on your trust issues.

Without trust, there is no love. Without love, there is no relationship.
Author:  Conker [ Thu May 06, 2010 3:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
Yep. And also, you say "that guy can seduce her" - you talk about her like she's some animal that will be coaxed into anything with a piece of food. You talk about the guy like he has this magical ability to make girls do what they want. You know where these ridiculous thoughts are coming from? Your own insecurity.
Author:  yassay [ Thu May 06, 2010 5:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Yep. And also, you say "that guy can seduce her" - you talk about her like she's some animal that will be coaxed into anything with a piece of food. You talk about the guy like he has this magical ability to make girls do what they want. You know where these ridiculous thoughts are coming from? Your own insecurity.

Hahaha... you speak like you don't even know this forum... hahaha
Author:  Conker [ Fri May 07, 2010 3:18 am ]
Post subject: 
My post = tough love.

Your post = bitchy remark.

Contribute something constructive by at least explaining why you think I'm wrong.
Author:  yassay [ Fri May 07, 2010 5:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sorry bro!
I meant that what you say is kinda actually what PUAs do. Not magically... but kinda. That's why I said that!

He's learning to do just that in this forum, why wouldn't he think another guy is the same?
Author:  Ezo [ Fri May 07, 2010 7:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
There are guys apart from PUAs who can attract girls... Scary but true.

To the OP:

She can do whatever she wants to do. The worst thing that can happen to a relationship is jealousy. Especially in a long distance relationship where trust is the number one factor.
Author:  Glint [ Sat May 08, 2010 7:09 am ]
Post subject: 
Just putting it out there, isn't everyone 'some animal that will be coaxed into anything with a piece of food'? I mean, have you seen some guys? All they need is to see a brastrap and they are trodden all over. Women, they need the most exotic food presented in just the right way that takes a few attempts to learn how.

Arnofol have you done any hollow sarging yet? The worst thing you can do is be on your own here. Meet some new, fun people! (without flirting/attracting)
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