Communication is one of the most important pillars of a strong relationship. Why don't you try talking to HER about this?
Your boy,
870
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| Author: | dark one [ Tue Mar 23, 2010 2:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Living with girlfriend???? |
Hi guys. I have been living with my girlfriend for the past 3 months and although I love her deeply! I have found my self starting to resent her a bit and become bored. I somtimes feel like she is taking me for granted and wonder if I really want to spend the rest of my life with her? I mean I really do love her! and we have alot of fun togeather but I feel like perhaps we want diffrent things in life? iduno? She is the complete opposite personality of me! she is very soft spoken and relaxed and I am more high strung and loud. If I broke up with her and asked her to move out I might regret it...she would be heart broken! crushed and it would prob take her by suprise! I guess what Im trying to say is that Im kinda stuck in a rut here because I love this women and Im not sure how to handle this one or, what to do? Any one feel the same or been through the same situation? |
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| Author: | TheJ [ Tue Mar 23, 2010 6:19 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
So what are you saying? That you need someone loud and high strung to get along with? It is entirely possible that she may not be the one for you. It is also entirely possible that she could be even with the differences. Honestly, that's not a question for us to answer. Is it the first time you fell this 'love'? What is your relationship pedigree? How does this one compare to the others. Do you feel like you are sharing on more then one level? Do you feel she loves you? What EXACTLY do you love about her? If she wasn't your 'love', would you like her personality enough to be with her as a friend? All this might give you some inclination as to your feelings. Do some searching on your own, and well, discuss with her on how you feel. I feel that loving someone is loving them through their 'faults'. Everyone can love someone for their qualities. So don't turn away becuase you see one thing you don't like. There will always be some of that. Good luck. |
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| Author: | dark one [ Wed Mar 24, 2010 12:54 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yes I love her to death and yes we would make good friend if we did not have a relationship. She loves me as well and we have alot of fun togeather but I feel like he and I might want diffrent things. I like to alway be on the go, fast pace life, Im very into fitness ect ect ect and she seems content living in a small house, in a normal job, making a normal wage ect ect ect. She tries to take intrest in my hobbies like being healthy ect...but she doesnt seem to enjoy that kind of thing nearly as much as I do. She wouldnt do any of the things she does with me if we were not togeather and it makes me feel like mabey we are on diffrent pages, like we want diffrent things out of life. Iv never been so in love in my life! I mean I have dated alot of women but I am truly in love with my gf...I just dont know if we want the same things, and at times she can really take me for granted...I think alot of it has to do with the realtionship sh had with her father (Not a good relationship at all). |
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| Author: | .Paul [ Wed Mar 24, 2010 2:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
From what I know past family relationships deffinatly have a rather large effect on current or future ones. It may be something to talk about(if you havn't already) and clear up on. Also, no two people are exactly alike, everybody want something just a little bit different from the next guy. So in your case, you may want to learn or try something a new or different every so often. She probably feels very secure and comfortable with the life she has now. I would only suggest that if it bothers you to a greater point, you may want to look at other options. not to sound rude or anything. |
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| Author: | TheJ [ Wed Mar 24, 2010 12:10 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: but I feel like he and I might want diffrent things.
Do you know what you want? Do you know what she wants? and I'm not asking: do you think you know what she wants. Also, like the previous poster said, no two people are the same. There will be diferences in interest. She is taking somewhat of an interst in it and thus is showing very open to it. That's as far as you can expect from someone that doesn't share your passion. Does your significant other need to share you passion? Heck no. As long as they don't prevent you from doing it and somewhat support you in it then there is no reason why you shoudn't be able to have a very succesfull and fruitfull relation with that girl. You could find a girl out there that is into fitness like you are and has a high 'energy' style of living. But believe me, you would find as many points of different interests with that girl then the one you have now. They just would be elsewhere. I have a girlfriend that I love to bits curently. I'm into sports she isn't. She's into modeling, I'm not. So she comes to see me play volleyball and hockey and whatnot and enjoys beeing the cheerleader even though she doesn't understand or cares much about the sports I play. I support her in her modeling; I drive her to her shoots, or go meet photographers with her and review her photos with her at home. Does that mean I would go full blast into modeling? Heck no. Do I expect her to buy some hockey equipment next year? Hell no. Yet this most likely will be the mother of my children. We have such a great connection elsewhere it doesn't matter that we don't fully share some of our passions. We give some space to the other to indulge in them and support them through it. Cheers |
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| Author: | dark one [ Sat Mar 27, 2010 1:34 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Quote: but I feel like he and I might want diffrent things.
Do you know what you want? Do you know what she wants? and I'm not asking: do you think you know what she wants. Also, like the previous poster said, no two people are the same. There will be diferences in interest. She is taking somewhat of an interst in it and thus is showing very open to it. That's as far as you can expect from someone that doesn't share your passion. Does your significant other need to share you passion? Heck no. As long as they don't prevent you from doing it and somewhat support you in it then there is no reason why you shoudn't be able to have a very succesfull and fruitfull relation with that girl. You could find a girl out there that is into fitness like you are and has a high 'energy' style of living. But believe me, you would find as many points of different interests with that girl then the one you have now. They just would be elsewhere. I have a girlfriend that I love to bits curently. I'm into sports she isn't. She's into modeling, I'm not. So she comes to see me play volleyball and hockey and whatnot and enjoys beeing the cheerleader even though she doesn't understand or cares much about the sports I play. I support her in her modeling; I drive her to her shoots, or go meet photographers with her and review her photos with her at home. Does that mean I would go full blast into modeling? Heck no. Do I expect her to buy some hockey equipment next year? Hell no. Yet this most likely will be the mother of my children. We have such a great connection elsewhere it doesn't matter that we don't fully share some of our passions. We give some space to the other to indulge in them and support them through it. Cheers |
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| Author: | 870 [ Sat Mar 27, 2010 1:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Communication is one of the most important pillars of a strong relationship. Why don't you try talking to HER about this? Your boy, 870 |
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