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really dont want to do this anymore..
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=60529
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Author:  trappinu [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 6:39 pm ]
Post subject:  really dont want to do this anymore..

me and my girlfriend have been going out for about a month and a half but were dating for the 3 months before that before we began being monogamous..ever since we started going out her interest in me has depleted-stopped texting/calling nearly as much, doesnt want to hang out as much, and talks to me differently/less affectionately such as stopped calling me babe/baby...as a result of all this i have became really bored with her and it sounds like she is bored with me as well..I want to still be with her, but propose an open relationship where we can hook up with other people..I still do really like her a lot, maybe even love, but i think proposing this might ignite the feelings she once had for me..how should i say this to her to make her seem like she let me get away and that im less interested and her, pretty much anything to ignite the sparks we once had..and anything you suggest to get her to maybe like me as much as she used to and feel like im more of a challenge to her..thanks for the help guys

Author:  General Lamb [ Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:16 am ]
Post subject: 

i don't think an open relationship is the way forward for savng the relationship, though you've made quite a few topics about this relationship and it's clear that it's not making you happy. maybe you should consider ending it completely? have a few days away from her so that you can collect your thoughts and decide whether her behaviour is suitable for you or not. also if necessary get yourself a safety net lined up for the rebound - makes walking away a lot easier.
Hope everything works out :)

Author:  Lodewijkp [ Thu Jan 21, 2010 3:47 pm ]
Post subject: 

ahhh i feel so good when posting on this forum ... i just like to smash the keyboard with my fingers when typing.
im just analyzing what your saying ... in my opinion:
Quote:
me and my girlfriend have been going out for about a month and a half but were dating for the 3 months before that before we began being monogamous..ever since we started going out her interest in me has depleted-stopped texting/calling nearly as much, doesnt want to hang out as much,
could be everything ... maybe she's not feeling wel ... you could ask of course
Quote:
as a result of all this i have became really bored with her and it sounds like she is bored with me as wel
you perceive it that way because you have certain expectations that are not fulfilled
Quote:
I want to still be with her, but propose an open relationship where we can hook up with other people
open relationships are retarded, why in earth you wanna do that ? can you explain ?

You could stop perceiving it as boring and try to spice it up yourself, just behave like you aren't bored with the relationship - do shit and do shit with her. a relationship is 50 / 50 and if you take responsibility for your 50 % it only can get better
Quote:
I still do really like her a lot, maybe even love
Quote:
I want to still be with her, but propose an open relationship where we can hook up with other people
decide what you want and repost

Author:  trappinu [ Thu Jan 21, 2010 4:45 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
ahhh i feel so good when posting on this forum ... i just like to smash the keyboard with my fingers when typing.
im just analyzing what your saying ... in my opinion:
Quote:
me and my girlfriend have been going out for about a month and a half but were dating for the 3 months before that before we began being monogamous..ever since we started going out her interest in me has depleted-stopped texting/calling nearly as much, doesnt want to hang out as much,
could be everything ... maybe she's not feeling wel ... you could ask of course
Quote:
as a result of all this i have became really bored with her and it sounds like she is bored with me as wel
you perceive it that way because you have certain expectations that are not fulfilled
Quote:
I want to still be with her, but propose an open relationship where we can hook up with other people
open relationships are retarded, why in earth you wanna do that ? can you explain ?

You could stop perceiving it as boring and try to spice it up yourself, just behave like you aren't bored with the relationship - do shit and do shit with her. a relationship is 50 / 50 and if you take responsibility for your 50 % it only can get better
Quote:
I still do really like her a lot, maybe even love
Quote:
I want to still be with her, but propose an open relationship where we can hook up with other people
decide what you want and repost
Ok first, when I did ask her what was going on she told me that she wasnt bored with the relationship and that she did realize anything was wrong and obviously she is playing dumb because she went from constantly texting/calling me to hardly ever..the only reason why I want to propose an open relationship is because I think that it might spice things up for us again because when we werent monogamous but dating is when she liked me the most because she knew that I was hooking up with other girls which made her demand me more and become jealous which ignited her feelings for me and that is when she liked me the most..I dont care to hook up with other girls but I feel that if i did again it might re-ignite the passion she once had for me and make her like me a bit more and become more interested in the relationship because as of now it seems like she is quite bored...what should I do when I ask to come over her house and she says I dont know and then doesnt get back to me? at first her lack of interest in me made me needy and like her a lot more, but i never became clingy..now im just frustrated with it..but I want to do everything possible to salvage the relationship because I do love her and dont want to move on which is what most people suggest on these forums..

Author:  Ezo [ Thu Jan 21, 2010 6:28 pm ]
Post subject: 

Didnt you ask exactly this question in another way already?

Author:  trappinu [ Thu Jan 21, 2010 6:46 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Didnt you ask exactly this question in another way already?
no, i never suggested how to propose an open relationship to my gf

Author:  Lodewijkp [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 2:28 pm ]
Post subject: 

well you can play games and try to get a spark going .. but when your gaming other girls you are merely manipulating her into attraction.
you use other girls to manipulate her into certain feelings, that won't work - a girl must have attraction without the jealousy plotline otherwise your relationship won't work on long term.

you could tell her you got feelings for her, it could give her more power in the relationship - but it could work the positive way !
I personally think you should be honest at this point.. yes i know this look needy or whatever.

you either choose for her and manipulation
or you choose for yourself ; honesty and respect

if you really want to get her i recommend you to play those games and stick to manipulation, if you want a potential serious relationship i think you should be honest. Don't walk up to her and say i love you ... say it when the time is right ..
and if you really don't give a fuck you say what you think/feel anyway and that is quitte crystal clear at this point.

by the way the title of your thread: ''really dont want to do this anymore..''
what don't you want to do?....honestly?

Author:  trappinu [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 4:31 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
well you can play games and try to get a spark going .. but when your gaming other girls you are merely manipulating her into attraction.
you use other girls to manipulate her into certain feelings, that won't work - a girl must have attraction without the jealousy plotline otherwise your relationship won't work on long term.

you could tell her you got feelings for her, it could give her more power in the relationship - but it could work the positive way !
I personally think you should be honest at this point.. yes i know this look needy or whatever.

you either choose for her and manipulation
or you choose for yourself ; honesty and respect

if you really want to get her i recommend you to play those games and stick to manipulation, if you want a potential serious relationship i think you should be honest. Don't walk up to her and say i love you ... say it when the time is right ..
and if you really don't give a fuck you say what you think/feel anyway and that is quitte crystal clear at this point.

by the way the title of your thread: ''really dont want to do this anymore..''
what don't you want to do?....honestly?
Ok, well I know that we will have to break up in 7 months so I know this wont be that long term anyway, but I do want to be with her for the next 7 months..so what games do you recommend? she ok'ed the open relationship so i plan on hooking up with every girl that comes my way and making sure she knows about it..yeah, so what kind of games are you talking about?

Author:  General Lamb [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 7:36 pm ]
Post subject: 

didn't you make another topic where she suggested an open relationship and you weren't cool with it?! this relationship doesn't sound like much fun

Author:  trappinu [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 8:49 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
didn't you make another topic where she suggested an open relationship and you weren't cool with it?! this relationship doesn't sound like much fun
that was for spring break, but yeah now im getting bored with her so i want to hu with other girls now bc it will ignite some sparks again plus she will hardly hu with anyone anyway so its cool with me..do you think its a bad sign that when i proposed it she was cool with it right away? what does that mean?

Author:  Ezo [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 9:07 pm ]
Post subject: 

It means that she is not that invested as you would like to believe...

Author:  Royalty [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 10:45 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Quote:
didn't you make another topic where she suggested an open relationship and you weren't cool with it?! this relationship doesn't sound like much fun
that was for spring break, but yeah now im getting bored with her so i want to hu with other girls now bc it will ignite some sparks again plus she will hardly hu with anyone anyway so its cool with me..do you think its a bad sign that when i proposed it she was cool with it right away? what does that mean?
Dude. 1. Accept the reality of your situation. 2. Realize your desired outcome. 3. Stop asking other people's opinions, and make a decision in order to achieve said outcome. 4. Get on with your life.

Of all the contributing factors of importance to your life, it seems you're putting way too much weight on this one situation. That's my two cents, pocket it or toss it in the fountain.

Author:  trappinu [ Wed Jan 27, 2010 7:52 am ]
Post subject: 

ok well a little update, i hooked up with another girl last night and then again today and she gave me head..i told my gf about it and ever since she has been calling/texting nonstop and told me that she wants to break off the open relationship and become exclusive again..i know i manipulated her into feeling this way bc i hooked up with this other girl but is this a good or bad thing?

Author:  Lodewijkp [ Wed Jan 27, 2010 2:59 pm ]
Post subject: 

it isn't bad or good .... you didn't hurt her feelings, she hurted her own by agreeing with a open relationship.
you both entered a open relationship and you acted like you have one ... nothing wrong with that. you didn't lie and you told her honestly about the other girl.

you didn't manipute her at all .. she did want an open relationship it's her own fault.

i would text/call her and told her she's acting out of jealousy.. (telling her the truth isn't manipulation). i don't want to go exclusive again ''right now '' because i don't manipulate people by making them jealous , im just living my life.

i would say something like that, make her feel like a little kid by telling her the truth so she can learn somthing out of it. it's the girl form the other thread... the one that talked about hooking up with friends and so forth.....

you have the advantage ... now she makes herself feel disrespected ... don't give in to anger or bad emotions just freeze her out. Make her chase you for a while maybe that will learn her some values on how to treat people with respect.
who gives better head .. the new girl or the other girl ?
i hope the head was good ... im bussy right now with studying, i miss the good old head :P

Author:  trappinu [ Fri Jan 29, 2010 6:37 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
it isn't bad or good .... you didn't hurt her feelings, she hurted her own by agreeing with a open relationship.
you both entered a open relationship and you acted like you have one ... nothing wrong with that. you didn't lie and you told her honestly about the other girl.

you didn't manipute her at all .. she did want an open relationship it's her own fault.

i would text/call her and told her she's acting out of jealousy.. (telling her the truth isn't manipulation). i don't want to go exclusive again ''right now '' because i don't manipulate people by making them jealous , im just living my life.

i would say something like that, make her feel like a little kid by telling her the truth so she can learn somthing out of it. it's the girl form the other thread... the one that talked about hooking up with friends and so forth.....

you have the advantage ... now she makes herself feel disrespected ... don't give in to anger or bad emotions just freeze her out. Make her chase you for a while maybe that will learn her some values on how to treat people with respect.
who gives better head .. the new girl or the other girl ?
i hope the head was good ... im bussy right now with studying, i miss the good old head :P
yeah i understand that it was her fault by agreeing to the open relationship, but the thing is she's acting really jealous right now, doesnt stop bringing up the other girl and so forth..she seems really upset about it and tells me how she has to "get me back now" by hooking up with another guy and i told her that it wouldnt bother me at all if she does, even though i know it will a little bit because i know that shows high value for me and that im not needy in the slightest bit..i just dont know what to do at this point because i do like the girl a lot but if she got bored after only a month and a half of being exclusive im starting to think that were not right for each other because that shouldnt happen..all of my friends who have relationships at our age,17, their girlfriends are constantly calling/texting them and are all over them but she wasnt like that with me..and the head was amazing btw, much better than my gf's :p

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