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| Neediness https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=58291 |
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| Author: | Trauma [ Sun Dec 20, 2009 2:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | Neediness |
Okay, I've used the tools I've learned from PuA to find myself a badass girl. More then just a girlfriend, she's now my fiance. In the long time since I first won her over, it appears that I've been showing alot more neediness and have since slacked on my PuA learnings. I find myself talking to her about relationship stuff alot, and it seems to be a turnoff for her. I find myself questioning what shes doing, who shes texting, where she is all the time when shes not with me...it really bothers me, but I feel like I need to know. I guess what I'm asking you guys, is how do I turn down the stuff I've been doing, but still feel comfortable with what is going on with her? I worry about her alot, and she has put herself in bad situations before due to her being pretty young and naive about shit. Any advice would be rad...thanks guys. |
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| Author: | Lodewijkp [ Sun Dec 20, 2009 8:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
i agree with hobbit .. here's my input. if you use methods and pua stuff to pickup a girl you are presenting yourself in a whole different way. when you get into a relationship you can't use that same cloak again ... you need to invest emotionally without being needy or clingy. PUA : not needy bas ass strong identity real life : needy ..... everyone needs someone to lean on emotional / AFC stories ( even i sometimes cry at night when bad shit happens ) weak links in identity .. you can't be 100 % strong all the time when she really gets to know you, your personal life ( things you tell her ) are in conflict with you ''pua'' identity. When you are ''pua''/ gaming you are constantlty conveying you are a cool guy, when you get into a relationship you can't constantly convey that anymore. it's like getting a gift with a beautifull wrapper around it .. but when you tear the paper away you see that there is nothing inside. BAD - ASS / BADBOY personality tends to attract messed up or trouble type girls. they are not stable so they search for someone who is stable and does not give a shit , but your not really that person. Quote: More then just a girlfriend, she's now my fiance
is she really your fiance or are you treating and thinking like she's your fianceexplain .. did you put a ring around a finger ? how long are you together ? what is the biggest problem in you or her life ? Quote: I find myself talking to her about relationship stuff alot, and it seems to be a turnoff for her.
because your relationship went too fast ... or your too serious - you don;t have to be serious all the time - do some fun stuff. she already gave you a sign she does not like you tallking about the relationship , and don't take control by forcing control.Quote: I find myself questioning what shes doing, who shes texting, where she is all the time when shes not with me...it really bothers me, but I feel like I need to know.
depends where you are in your relationship... if you really have stong band like you said you can talk about it. just tell her you like to know what she does ..Quote: I worry about her alot, and she has put herself in bad situations before due to her being pretty young and naive about shit.
im gonna be like doctor phil because this is important .. take this very seriously !what is her age ? Don't worry about her...... we are all adults and mature and getting in bad situations is normal .... trail and error - she have to learn it. investing in worrying is not a smart thing to do .. it's fucknig dumb ... it's better to re-direct that energy in good communication and doing fun things. don't argue with her .... freedom is a precious gift.. don't take away 1 % of that freedom. she already gave up some of her space by getting involved with you. be a boyfriend instead of her therapist or dad , she doesn't need a thirth parent it's better to give yourself some of that energy and attention .... keep developing yourself and keep your confidence up . Don't give her a man who is constantly worrying that's not healty , Give her a man who adds something to the relationship with adding i mean -you being happy. if you aren't happy she won't be happy either and vice versa if you get some worrying thoughts i want you to close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. : there is nothing to worry about, keep repeating it until you really believe it. my ex-fiance was had a disease .... when i was worried she always was sad... after a while i found something to vent my emotions on ... hitting the punching bag doing some MMA sparring or walking trough the forrest. don't vent your emotions in form of worrying constantly on your GF. 1,when guys get into a relationship they keep worrying. 2. when they break up guys are worrying........ at number one you can't worry at number 2 you can shed some light on this fiance situation ... and where you stand in this relationship be honest with yourself. |
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