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GF thinks she's fat... won't shut up about it
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Author:  InalienableRights [ Sat Jul 11, 2009 1:53 am ]
Post subject:  GF thinks she's fat... won't shut up about it

My GF is a SHB, very very attractive, and at the moment in very good shape. She gets approached/stared at by men constantly. However, she constantly asks me if I think she's fat. She has gained like 4 pounds the past month, but she's still on the low end of her BMI for her height and I think she's hot as ever.

I've tried reassuring her; I tell her I think she's gorgeous and so does everyone else and she needs to just be confident about it. It's never enough though. It's gotten so bad that she is even self-conscious about being fat in bed. It's hurting our sexlives. Finally, I told her I can't take it any more and that if she feels fat she should go work out and stop harassing me about it.

This just made her really sad. What should I do?

Author:  Chief [ Sat Jul 11, 2009 2:45 am ]
Post subject: 

Hmmm.... Maybe you can try doing this. Whenever she asks that question, look at her as if she's gone insane and then just laugh like she just told you a joke. Done.

Might work :P

Author:  Brendan [ Sat Jul 11, 2009 9:07 am ]
Post subject: 

pay a stranger to walk by and compliment her lol

Author:  delsol00000 [ Wed Jul 15, 2009 10:19 am ]
Post subject: 

I have the same problem with my gf and many before. Its just their way of getting validation from you. The simple answer is just re-assure them. I admit it gets tiring sometimes, but my gf has cut down on it loads.

Telling her to go work out if she has issues with herself was not to good an idea.You want to re-assure her as much as possible. The compliment that i used whne i had had enough of it was :

"honey you could wear anything and you'd look slim, you know why dont you?

"why?"

"because you are, and to be honest if for any reason u did get an ounce of fat on you i'd still love ya all the same"

Something like that usually works because u have reassured them they look good generally, and that you love them for who they are which women LOVE!

Hope this helps.

Author:  Sexcellent [ Wed Jul 15, 2009 7:38 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
I have the same problem with my gf and many before. Its just their way of getting validation from you. The simple answer is just re-assure them. I admit it gets tiring sometimes, but my gf has cut down on it loads.

Telling her to go work out if she has issues with herself was not to good an idea.You want to re-assure her as much as possible. The compliment that i used whne i had had enough of it was :

"honey you could wear anything and you'd look slim, you know why dont you?

"why?"

"because you are, and to be honest if for any reason u did get an ounce of fat on you i'd still love ya all the same"

Something like that usually works because u have reassured them they look good generally, and that you love them for who they are which women LOVE!

Hope this helps.
i agree that she either:

A) has an issue with seeking validation from you, or
B) has an issue with her self image

regardless of which issue she has, i think you need to make sure that you come across as genuine when you help her with it. with women, sometimes it's not just the words we say, but the way we say it or the things we do that matters to them.

Author:  96Firebird [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 12:24 am ]
Post subject: 

My girlfriend does the same. However, I do not validate her. Instead, I tell her to shut up and ignore her for a while. Here's why... When you give in and say no she isn't fat she is beautiful blah blah blah, she has got what she wanted from you by nagging you. Furthermore, she is more inclined to believe she isn't fat when you ignore her than when you smother her because she knows you'll just say she isn't because you're supposed to. My girlfriend has gained a few pounds since we started dating, but it doesn't really bother me. Plus, she has joined a gym and is working on improving her health.

Author:  Marc [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 5:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: GF thinks she's fat... won't shut up about it

Quote:
My GF is a SHB, very very attractive, and at the moment in very good shape. She gets approached/stared at by men constantly. However, she constantly asks me if I think she's fat. She has gained like 4 pounds the past month, but she's still on the low end of her BMI for her height and I think she's hot as ever.

I've tried reassuring her; I tell her I think she's gorgeous and so does everyone else and she needs to just be confident about it. It's never enough though. It's gotten so bad that she is even self-conscious about being fat in bed. It's hurting our sexlives. Finally, I told her I can't take it any more and that if she feels fat she should go work out and stop harassing me about it.

This just made her really sad. What should I do?

Age old question that all we guys have to deal with:

1) She needs validation from you
2) She is self concious and has a image problem

I would normally tell my girls something like " Yeah your butt and breasts look big, I like it please dont loose wait there". Dont give her any compliments etc. than whenevr she wants to be complimented she would come back to you with the question.

If she comes back again. Tell her something like "let me see you in your bikini" and then sexualize the whole conversation. Well if she comes back in a bikini than have sex !!

Author:  locout [ Tue Jul 21, 2009 1:09 am ]
Post subject: 

Nah the best thing is to just say you think she looks great (which you do). and like others have said, genuinely reassure her that you love her the way she is no matter what. girls absolutely fucking love that, it puts their minds at ease. Ignoring her isn't going to do anything but make her more paranoid and pushes the relationship towards an unhealthy don't-ask-don't-tell zone.

if you actually DID have a problem with her weight, then go with the shit sandwich; tell her youthink she should watch what shes eating/ work out a bit more... layed in between tons of compliments

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