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hb 9 is a lil uncomfortable being alone with me?
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Author:  alvarado [ Mon Jul 06, 2009 10:06 am ]
Post subject:  hb 9 is a lil uncomfortable being alone with me?
hey people well my gf hangs like 69% more with here friends than me. It's hard to get her isolated with me. I have the idea that she feels uncomfortable with me alone. I don't know why?????? I mean we had sex 1 time. I don't know if she's avoiding that or is there something else what can I do about that? Thanks for all of you bothering helping me. Sorry bad grammer.
Author:  JSmooth [ Mon Jul 06, 2009 4:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: hb 9 is a lil uncomfortable being alone with me?
Quote:
hey people well my gf hangs like 69% more with here friends than me. It's hard to get her isolated with me. I have the idea that she feels uncomfortable with me alone. I don't know why?????? I mean we had sex 1 time. I don't know if she's avoiding that or is there something else what can I do about that? Thanks for all of you bothering helping me. Sorry bad grammer.
***Bad Grammer Revised by Moderator***

You are asking a pretty big question without being able to provide a lot of information. The possibilities are endless. Sex complicates relationships at times and if it occured really early in your relationship or if there wasn't much of a relationship there then she might have had some "buyer's remorse" about doing that with you. That would explain why she doesn't want to be alone around you because she figures you just want more sex.

You need to demonstrate to her somehow that you two can just hang out be friends, and have good conversation without you trying to have sex with her or escalating things. Then you will be able to hang out with her more. Basically, you need to go back and work on your comfort & rapport with her.

Jon
Author:  alvarado [ Mon Jul 06, 2009 9:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Thank
Thank and how can I work on my comfer and report??
Author:  JSmooth [ Mon Jul 06, 2009 9:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Thank
Quote:
Thank and how can I work on my comfer and report??
Irwin,

Comfort and Rapport

Stop worrying about how to attract her or get her into bed and just be her friend. Do things with her and not try to steal a kiss all the time or anything else. She needs to know that she can hang out with you and all that other stuff not happen. She has to trust you as a friend and get to know you better. When she does the sex will come easily later on, but focus on just being a friend for now.

Go out to movies or do whatever, just do things with her, LISTEN TO HER, and be a friend!
Author:  alvarado [ Mon Jul 06, 2009 10:06 pm ]
Post subject:  but
Ooh I get it but dusent that leads me to freand zone?
Author:  JSmooth [ Mon Jul 06, 2009 10:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: but
Quote:
Ooh I get it but doesn't that lead me to friend zone?

OKAY, YES! That is the problem Irwin. You built some attraction with her and you talked her into having sex with you in some way or another. BUT she obviously isn't comfortable enough with you to just hang out or spend time with you. What you have told us of her actions tell us that.

She is not comfortable hanging out with you because she doesn't know you two can hang without you trying to get into her pants again. THUS, she doesn't hang out with you anymore.

If you have too much Attraction and little to no comfort then you become the SEDUCER and women don't want to hang around you.

Too much Comfort and no Attraction and we become just FRIENDS.

We want a balance right! So since you had attraciton and seduction to get her into bed but she doesn't want to hang with you then you need to focus on the comfort. And since we've burned her a little bit we need to give it a bit more than normal. TRUST ME, focus on being her friend for a while to balance the scales and then you can make your move.

Jon
Author:  alvarado [ Thu Jul 09, 2009 7:13 am ]
Post subject: 
oh nice thank u jsmooth!!!!! But a nother cuestion y wud she feal like this if we fuckt 1 time alredy(last week) lol . I mean shudent this make her more comfterbal with me!????.....
Author:  Workaholic [ Thu Jul 09, 2009 9:59 am ]
Post subject: 
Which hole did you stick in?


No seriously, she probably feels uncomfortable as it was either rushed or it was just uncomfortable (read all the stuff on forum) about making sure she is in the mood.

Also where are your friends? You should remember girls friends are the key if they hate you then you will be the topic of most conversations (not good ones), get close to her friends win their vote and she will like you more. Stop being needy and spend time with your friends also most people make the mistake of ditching everything when they enter a relationship!
Author:  JSmooth [ Thu Jul 09, 2009 7:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
oh nice thank u jsmooth!!!!! But a nother cuestion y wud she feal like this if we fuckt 1 time alredy(last week) lol . I mean shudent this make her more comfterbal with me!????.....
You're welcome. Just because you had sex with someone that doesn't automatically make them comfortable enough to hang out with you or anything else. I mean there are tons of one night stands that happen all the time where the people don't know anything about each other. That doesn't mean they wake up and want to hang out forever right?

I think you are getting my point. Sex is not a tool to build comfort. In depth conversation, time together, sharing your personality, identifying with aspects of the other persons personality, and sharing experiences together builds comfort. Sex doesn't necessarily count in this case.
Author:  alvarado [ Thu Jul 09, 2009 7:51 pm ]
Post subject:  .
NICE JSMOOTH I LIKE THE WAY U THINK !!!!!!! MAY B U CAN HELP ME IN MY OTHER POST! IS ABOUT - HB(9) GET IN ON THE WAY . THANKS 4 THE HELP ON THIS POST
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