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Haha if my gf told me this I would prob kick her to the curb! Guys dont hang out with girls one on one just to hang out....you should now that by now man! she might not be cheat.....YET! this guy wants to sleep with her and she is either knows and is leading him on, or like most women is dumb and thinks "we are just friends".
If it was me I would tell her "It me or him" if she knows you dont like it then she should stop...tell her to put her self in your shoes and if she cant do that then end things.
This is good advice if you are prepared to walk away from the relationship. You had better be truly prepared for that before you lay down an ultimatum like this though.
In my experience, when a girl is deciding to hang out one on one with a guy like this, she definitely enjoys his company, be it "friendly" or not, which is obviously not good for you.
Nevertheless, even if it is more than friendly, she's most likely going to deny it completely, and she'll probably mean it. Girls aren't even aware how much they are into a guy sometimes, especially when they're in a relationship with someone else. It's really weird - sometimes they just live in denial, even to themselves.
At any rate, here's what I think you should do: A) Lay down the ultimatum and mean it, which I'd say gives you about a 95% chance of ending the relationship, or B) Start talking to/hanging out with other girls, and make sure ur LDR knows about it - subtly of course.
Nothing heightens a girl's appreciation of you like a little friendly competition. Just call up some old girl friend (note the space) or acquaintance of yours and tell her to meet you for coffee and talk about a class you have together or something mundane. Just play it totally cool.
If you are serious about keeping this girl and don't want to lose her to the new guy (which seems to be the case), I'd say this is your best bet for achieving what you want. Then, next time you talk to her, don't bring up her and the new guy AT ALL. Just say something along the lines of, "hey babe, I hope you don't mind but I had/am going to have coffee with this girl from X class/club/whatever. I just wanted to let you know before I went/that I went so you know I'm not doing anything shady. Anyways..." then just completely change the subject.
If she doesn't go along with the subject change and starts asking about the girl, you know you've got her back. Whatever you do, don't lose your cool about it. If she doesn't respond to it, don't push the issue. If she flips out, just play it cool and be like "I just assumed it was cool since we both have friends of the opposite sex and stuff, u know, like u and that one guy."
I can't emphasize enough how important it is for you to not let your emotions get the better of you here. It sounds like the situation is pretty volatile for you right now and she's probably having doubts about sticking with you - that's just my hunch based on what you wrote above.
Either way man, you should always have some girl friends on the side. I learned that the hard way. Girls value you much, much more when other girls like you. It sounds manipulative but its just a fact of life.
Best of luck man.
