last night my gf was with a friend and she went m.i. a. On me from like 9 to 12

I was recently reading an amazing post by wolfwood about reward and punishment in a relationship and somebody brought up how communication is also important.so my question is how do you tell the difference between a situation that calls for communicating your problems and one where you should just withdraw your affection?


For example: last night my gf was with a friend and she went m.i. a. On me from like 9 to 12 and then texted me saying she fell asleep and was really sorry.i believe her for various reasons but still didnt wanna Return that behavior by being super sweet to her so today ive been a tad bit cold.nothing serious or mean ive just been staying in my work and havent been quite as interested or affectionate.i feel like communicating how i feel somewhat disrespected over her disappearing for just a few hours would make me look crazy and its really not a big deal, i simply dont think i should be too affectionate after that or she might think its cool to blow me off.what do you guys think? Should i just communicate with her about it? And how do you tell when to communicate and when not to?

i believe her for various reasons but still didnt wanna Return that behavior by being super sweet to her so today ive been a tad bit cold.nothing serious or mean ive just been staying in my work and havent been quite as interested or affectionate.i feel like communicating how i feel somewhat disrespected over her disappearing for just a few hours would make me look crazy and its really not a big deal, i simply dont think i should be too affectionate after that or she might think its cool to blow me off.

last night my gf was with a friend and she went m.i. a. On me from like 9 to 12

my point about punishment is not to reward her

Sure verbalize, my point about punishment is not to reward her. "That's okay" bullshit mentality. No passive aggressive anything. So many guys just kissing girl ass all the time.

I was recently reading an amazing post by wolfwood about reward and punishment in a relationship and somebody brought up how communication is also important.so my question is how do you tell the difference between a situation that calls for communicating your problems and one where you should just withdraw your affection?


For example: last night my gf was with a friend and she went m.i. a. On me from like 9 to 12 and then texted me saying she fell asleep and was really sorry.i believe her for various reasons but still didnt wanna Return that behavior by being super sweet to her so today ive been a tad bit cold.nothing serious or mean ive just been staying in my work and havent been quite as interested or affectionate.i feel like communicating how i feel somewhat disrespected over her disappearing for just a few hours would make me look crazy and its really not a big deal, i simply dont think i should be too affectionate after that or she might think its cool to blow me off.what do you guys think? Should i just communicate with her about it? And how do you tell when to communicate and when not to?

I was recently reading an amazing post by wolfwood about reward and punishment in a relationship and somebody brought up how communication is also important.so my question is how do you tell the difference between a situation that calls for communicating your problems and one where you should just withdraw your affection?


For example: last night my gf was with a friend and she went m.i. a. On me from like 9 to 12 and then texted me saying she fell asleep and was really sorry.i believe her for various reasons but still didnt wanna Return that behavior by being super sweet to her so today ive been a tad bit cold.nothing serious or mean ive just been staying in my work and havent been quite as interested or affectionate.i feel like communicating how i feel somewhat disrespected over her disappearing for just a few hours would make me look crazy and its really not a big deal, i simply dont think i should be too affectionate after that or she might think its cool to blow me off.what do you guys think? Should i just communicate with her about it? And how do you tell when to communicate and when not to?

Sure verbalize, my point about punishment is not to reward her. "That's okay" bullshit mentality. No passive aggressive anything. So many guys just kissing girl ass all the time.

What do you mean she went missing from 9 to 12? You mean she just didn't text you back for 3 hours? I don't know you guys relationship or what the "norm" for you two is, so i can only say that that sounds like a bit much to me. And if its not, i could see it becoming tiresome shortly.

How long have you guys been together. And whats the normal flow of communication like?

Im going to assume that her not replying for 3 hours is inconsistent with how she normally behaves or that you may be feeling a shift in your gut about her that may be triggered by either you or something she's feeling about you. But i wouldn't make a big deal over a one time thing. Now if she's on several occasions she deviates from what was once "normal" we may be talking something different.

All that can be said here though is that ONLY YOU know whats normal and not normal for you two. And only your gut knows whether this was intentional or legitimate. In my world what you're doing is a bit "crazy", but you're not in my world so i can't hold you to the standard of my world. Perhaps thats what you require from the women you talk to, and if thats truly what you want no one can tell you you shouldn't have it. You'll just need to find the girl that can handle giving it to you.

If you feel like you're being disrespected, communicate it, and if you don't feel like you were understood or if your position was respected then you could consider something else; whatever that something else might be for you. But communication is always a good first steps. Relationships are 80% communication. its the communication that keeps everything going.