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She cheated after 6 years
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Author:  qwe123 [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 10:02 am ]
Post subject:  She cheated after 6 years

Found out my Girlfriend of 6 years kissed another guy. She wasn't going to tell me but after having a suspicion I asked her and she told me, she then went on to tell me lots of reasons why she isn't happy with us. Felt like it was her being defensive as these issues could be solvable if she communicated with me.

She was drunk and doesn't remember. I spoke to the guy, according to him she instigated it and kissed him for 15 seconds. He thought it was going to go further but she stopped.

We've had big talks over the last few days, where I've gone wrong as well as her and if we're to get over it what guidelines there needs to be. That's not to excuse her actions, I'm devastated but I'm contemplating whether it's something I can get over or whether it's better to just end it and move on.

An added issue is that I have no money, in a bit of debt the last few months haven't been great (I am self-employed) so I have become slightly dependent on her. I would have to potentially leave the city I live in and move home.

Anyway, am I kidding myself that this relationship can be saved? Or do I need to hear some home truths and get it done with. I feel like she's twisted a knife in my back, I trusted this girl with everything, she's thrown away 6 years. At the same time mistakes happen and she did stop - it's almost easier if she went the whole way it would of been over by now.

Author:  Mr_Crownley [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 11:20 am ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

For me, cheating is a big red line. There is no single thing that she can tell you to excuse what she did.
Mistakes can happen, you can be in a very bad position, the relationship may be going through difficulties, but cheating means you do something bad on purpose, which means that the relationship should be over.

Author:  Dragula [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 11:31 am ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

The trust has been severed. Every second she is not with you, I know for a fact that you are going to get paranoid that she is having the hugest spunkiest orgy known to man with Galist and Arch Stanton leading the train.

You will be that insecure guy, that calls his gf every 5 mins when she goes out with her girlie's

It will not last. Sorry. It just won't. But we know you guys never listen anyway. :)

Author:  qwe123 [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
The trust has been severed. Every second she is not with you, I know for a fact that you are going to get paranoid that she is having the hugest spunkiest orgy known to man.

You will be that insecure guy, that calls his gf every 5 mins when she goes out with her girlie's

It will not last. Sorry. It just won't. But we know you guys never listen anyway. :)
You're probably right. I'm hurting pretty fucking bad but I've shared a huge chunk of my life with her and I'm obviously blinded by emotions. There's better girls out there right? Lol

Author:  Dragula [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Quote:
The trust has been severed. Every second she is not with you, I know for a fact that you are going to get paranoid that she is having the hugest spunkiest orgy known to man.

You will be that insecure guy, that calls his gf every 5 mins when she goes out with her girlie's

It will not last. Sorry. It just won't. But we know you guys never listen anyway. :)
You're probably right. I'm hurting pretty fucking bad but I've shared a huge chunk of my life with her and I'm obviously blinded by emotions. There's better girls out there right? Lol
There is, bro

But it so easy to 'forgive' and when you have no chicks in background wanting your cock. Don't let that happen, fight through the dip and get a chick hotter chick who is actually loyal.

You can do it. Good luck

p.s. You really shouldn't depend on girls financially. Being an attractive man should not need women to live from, this is very beta and unattractive. I am pretty sure that this dynamic made it easier for her to kiss that guy.

Now if she relied on YOU. She might think twice to pull that shit

Author:  qwe123 [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:42 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
The trust has been severed. Every second she is not with you, I know for a fact that you are going to get paranoid that she is having the hugest spunkiest orgy known to man.

You will be that insecure guy, that calls his gf every 5 mins when she goes out with her girlie's

It will not last. Sorry. It just won't. But we know you guys never listen anyway. :)
You're probably right. I'm hurting pretty fucking bad but I've shared a huge chunk of my life with her and I'm obviously blinded by emotions. There's better girls out there right? Lol
There is, bro

But it so easy to 'forgive' and when you have no chicks in background wanting your cock. Don't let that happen, fight through the dip and get a chick hotter chick who is actually loyal.

You can do it. Good luck

p.s. You really shouldn't depend on girls financially. Being an attractive man should not need women to live from, this is very beta and unattractive. I am pretty sure that this dynamic made it easier for her to kiss that guy.

Now if she relied on YOU. She might think twice to pull that shit
You're right, I'm not reliant on her so much but my business had taken a turn for the worse recently and she offered to lend me money until it gets better in the next couple of months (which it is, not just speculation). Basically I've been going through a personal rough patch, let the it slip and I've been naive in thinking she would understand.

Author:  galist [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 1:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Found out my Girlfriend of 6 years kissed another guy. She wasn't going to tell me but after having a suspicion I asked her and she told me, she then went on to tell me lots of reasons why she isn't happy with us. Felt like it was her being defensive as these issues could be solvable if she communicated with me.

She was drunk and doesn't remember. I spoke to the guy, according to him she instigated it and kissed him for 15 seconds. He thought it was going to go further but she stopped.

We've had big talks over the last few days, where I've gone wrong as well as her and if we're to get over it what guidelines there needs to be. That's not to excuse her actions, I'm devastated but I'm contemplating whether it's something I can get over or whether it's better to just end it and move on.

An added issue is that I have no money, in a bit of debt the last few months haven't been great (I am self-employed) so I have become slightly dependent on her. I would have to potentially leave the city I live in and move home.

Anyway, am I kidding myself that this relationship can be saved? Or do I need to hear some home truths and get it done with. I feel like she's twisted a knife in my back, I trusted this girl with everything, she's thrown away 6 years. At the same time mistakes happen and she did stop - it's almost easier if she went the whole way it would of been over by now.
she probably gave you watered down version of what happened.

a kiss is just a kiss, you must remember this.

Author:  Dragula [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 1:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
she probably gave you watered down version of what happened.
Now THAT is something I agree with. GOOD JOB

Author:  qwe123 [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 2:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Quote:
she probably gave you watered down version of what happened.
Now THAT is something I agree with. GOOD JOB
She didn't even give me a version, she couldn't remember. I spoke to the guy she kissed, who I felt was honest with me, but who knows?

Another issue: If I'm to break it off, we have the same friendship group. Any tips on no contact/getting over her in this situation?

Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 2:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

You've already gotten good advice.

Currently you have extreme tunnel vision. And she is at the end of that tunnel.
Imagine for a moment, removing those blinders, to reveal all the other options that are in front of you.

This isn't the time to focus on her, now is the time to be selfish and fix yourself and your business.

The guy in the mirror is who you face at the end of the day.

Once you discover that you don't need her, or anyone else to make you a complete human, the tide will indeed turn.

Author:  n2thevoid [ Tue Aug 09, 2016 11:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
You've already gotten good advice.

Currently you have extreme tunnel vision. And she is at the end of that tunnel.
Imagine for a moment, removing those blinders, to reveal all the other options that are in front of you.

This isn't the time to focus on her, now is the time to be selfish and fix yourself and your business.

The guy in the mirror is who you face at the end of the day.

Once you discover that you don't need her, or anyone else to make you a complete human, the tide will indeed turn.
Hate to say it but Blowjob here is right.

Author:  galist [ Wed Aug 10, 2016 7:12 am ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Quote:
You've already gotten good advice.

Currently you have extreme tunnel vision. And she is at the end of that tunnel.
Imagine for a moment, removing those blinders, to reveal all the other options that are in front of you.

This isn't the time to focus on her, now is the time to be selfish and fix yourself and your business.

The guy in the mirror is who you face at the end of the day.

Once you discover that you don't need her, or anyone else to make you a complete human, the tide will indeed turn.
Hate to say it but Blowjob here is right.
dump her and join my guild in the world of war craft. im a level 90 ogre

Author:  younglady [ Wed Aug 10, 2016 12:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Is there some reason you haven't married her after 6 whole years...?

Author:  qwe123 [ Wed Aug 10, 2016 1:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Is there some reason you haven't married her after 6 whole years...?
Because getting married in your early/mid 20s makes you a fucking idiot

If you're supposedly going to spend your whole life together then 6 years is not a long time.

Author:  Dragula [ Wed Aug 10, 2016 2:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: She cheated after 6 years

Quote:
Because getting married in your early/mid 20s makes you a fucking idiot
[/quote]


Haha - Touche

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