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Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
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Author:  Greene401 [ Mon Nov 09, 2015 9:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
The relationship has been going good for the most part. Communication and sex are both good. All-in-all, acts like a very good girlfriend. She’s never denied me sex. Whenever we do…it’s extremely passionate.

1) I’ve noticed she has bruises in the oddest places. Big purple bruise on the back of her arm. Similar to the picture.

2) Bruise on one side of her leg, and an almost matching one on the opposing side.

3) Bruise on her knee. (She doesn’t play sports. Says it was from her leg hanging off the bed against my bed frame while going down on me.)

4) Bruise on the inside of her leg right above her knee.

Now again, a bruise on the inside of her thigh.

I really don’t trust women much. Now, I can say for a fact, I’ve grabbed her ass, her back, but NOT where the bruises are showing up. I mean how the fk do you bruise the inside of your thigh?

Could very well be that I’ve been thirsty for new women. Miss the chase. As if my minds trying to convince me, that I’m justified in cheating on her. About to break up with her.

FYI, I’ve asked the woman about an open relationship. She starts crying heavy. All emotional. If I’m the least bit upset, she gets teary eyed, asking what she can do to fix it.

I’m not trying to be paranoid. Really I’d prefer an open relationship. I care more about being open and honest than I do exclusivity. But, what is your take on this?

As I’ve said, it’s not a one off thing. More of a pattern.

Image
Author:  DW-Heart-Charmer [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:58 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
It's interesting, you use the bruises and trust issues as such to justify leaving this girl or changing the relationship. Maybe change the relationship for you.
Quote:
FYI, I’ve asked the woman about an open relationship. She starts crying heavy. All emotional. If I’m the least bit upset, she gets teary eyed, asking what she can do to fix it.

I’m not trying to be paranoid. Really I’d prefer an open relationship. I care more about being open and honest than I do exclusivity. But, what is your take on this?
Let her know that you care deeply about her, but you are seeing other girls for you. If she wants to still be will you nothing will change besides exclusivity, but you have to be who you truly are. Walk away as if you are leaving and often they will accept the new relationship eventually.
Author:  Game00617 [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 5:22 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
I'm more questioning if that's rational. In what seems like an otherwise great relationship, to see shit like that, and bail out...

I see shit like that, assume she's fucking someone else. That I may as well do the same. And it's not worth worrying about. But, more a question of if I should end an otherwise good relationship.
Author:  masterm1ne [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 7:16 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
Quote:
I'm more questioning if that's rational. In what seems like an otherwise great relationship, to see shit like that, and bail out...

I see shit like that, assume she's fucking someone else. That I may as well do the same. And it's not worth worrying about. But, more a question of if I should end an otherwise good relationship.
Did you ask her if she was or if someone has hit her...?

Most girls that have been abused will admit it esp after they have sex with you.
Author:  DW-Heart-Charmer [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 1:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
Quote:
I'm more questioning if that's rational. In what seems like an otherwise great relationship, to see shit like that, and bail out...

I see shit like that, assume she's fucking someone else. That I may as well do the same. And it's not worth worrying about. But, more a question of if I should end an otherwise good relationship.
Rarely are relationships rational. Those bruises are concerning and her excuses wouldn't make me feel any better. Often your intuition is the best measure on this. If something doesn't feel right, it likely isn't IME.
Author:  J.Daniels [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
Is she a pole dancer...?
Author:  Greene401 [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
Background Info

The reason I’m even questioning it:
1) Communication is great.
2) Always calling me. Extremely positive conversations.
3) Always wants to see me
4) Almost complete compliance if I say something
5) Never too busy to meet up. If so…she works right around it.
6) Will pretty much hand me her phone to use for the day if my battery is dead
7) If she sees that I seem upset… she gets sad. Asks what she can do to fix it or help. Gets teary eyed.
8) Told her Mom, her brother, and all her friends back home about me
9) Her laptop and phone are basically much FULL of pictures of me.


She otherwise seems like a great and committed girlfriend. Aside from that, don’t see very much shady shit going on. She spends most of the day/night studying (as in legit.) Doesn’t drink or party.

Do my best to avoid routine. Do new activities, hit new restaurants.

The main source of conflict, especially transitioning from casual dating, where I had 3 other girls I was fucking, to being exclusive, was me telling her I don’t want a relationship.

First time I noticed it, was 5 months ago. Told her I'm not looking for a relationship. We meet up. She has a dark purple bruise on the outside of her arm. Similar to her leg. Small. Ok. No biggie.

The facts speak for themselves. I didn’t grab her there. Not the first time, I see bruises that are fking suspect. Don’t want to jump the gun and start cheating on her, or dump her without weighing it out.
Author:  Greene401 [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:42 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
No sports. No biking. Nope.Lives with two female roommates.
Author:  J.Daniels [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
Why would you start cheating on her? Cheating for revenge is fucking childish lol. If you believe her then stay with her and either commit or leave. If you don't believe her, leave.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Tue Nov 10, 2015 4:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Question of Staying in Relationship: Fidelity
The first time you asked this stuff about the bruising... The thread got locked and you confused everyone.

relationships/question-relationship-mat ... 92003.html

This is a continuation of that topic... You are asking if she's fucking around cause she's got bruises... So I guess you can too now?

Please don't ask this again.
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