Great post, Eddie! (long, but great
)A lot of the same type of questions/problems on the forum these days - and you've mentioned some of what you've written here in a couple of the threads. I think it's great advice.
| PUA Forum https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| Going Through A Break Up? Read This Now https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=188442 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Fri Feb 27, 2015 3:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Going Through A Break Up? Read This Now |
And article I wrote for WayofThePlayer: The holidays just seem to be the time in which everyone decides to save money on gift buying and break up with their partners and as a result I’ve gotten a share of emails asking about getting back with ex girlfriends, dealing with heart break, etc. I decided I would make a public post about the question and stories I’ve bene hearing and the way I responded. Every guy going through it seems to think that their girlfriend was the “special” one, and while that may be partially true; the full truth is that there is something special about everyone of these women. No one is more special than the other. Its just the feeling of loss mixed with the feelings of “wanting what you can’t have” that causes men to romanticize over women who probably meant absolutely nothing to the last couple guys that walked in and out of their life. I often wonder how a man with high self esteem and pride could feel comfortable dating a girl who had let men walk all over them just months before meeting you. Wheres your dignity? Surely if the last guy treated her like dirt and she allowed it you don’t want to be the one to roll out the red carpet.. or do you? But you know what they say.. “ One mans trash is another mans treasure”. I find myself curious about how the women I’m dating let guys treat them in the past. When you feel you are deserving of the best you kind of don’t wanna settle for a woman who didn’t know her worth until she was inspired by the love you began to give her. I’ll be the first to admit that I have made this mistake a couple times, but after the first I was always quick to snap out of it. There is a well of women out here; a well of amazing women. As I am writing this there is beautiful barista working behind the counter at the cafe I’m sitting at. She has no real shape, no ass, average sized breast, but her face is gorgeous and she carries herself with such grace and elegance. Not to mention I was out with an amazing woman last night; theres just so many. I repeat phrases like “ theres so many great women” because i really want the readers to get it. If you’re heart broken, cry it out but get over it. The moment you wipe the water clouding your vision you’ll notice all the great women you’re surrounded by. I saw a study recently in which a scientist created a test group of 20 strangers – ten male, ten female and paired them up facing each other while sitting at tables. They were to stare each other in the eyes while reading romantic poetry and repeating phrases like “ I love you” and “ I want to spend my life with you”. The study went on for 8 hours.. And you know what happen? When it was done three out of the ten couples got married and four of the remaining seven couples began seeing each other after the study. So what does that tell us? What we know to be love is truthfully something we coax ourselves into being in when we find someone who we feel is attractive enough (whether internally, externally or both), that we happen to begin seeing consistently. It is our own thoughts, it is the things we say to ourselves about the partner while they’re not around that slowly but surely fills us with the chemical reaction we know to be infatuation. I fall in love easily, I always have, because I enjoy it. I enjoy the emotions, I enjoy the rush, the inspiration; I even enjoy the momentary pain once its all said and done. Its all creative fuel for me. I use for creativity. I fall in love because it is part of my purpose in life to, however i’m always completely aware that this is ME thats making all of this happen. There is no special girl necessarily; but there is special thoughts of my own creation. And i then use those same thoughts to rise on above and beyond it. If you’ve fell in love once you can fall in love again. Its simply a matter of teaching yourself too; and like anything else – with practice comes perfection. Anyway; I’ll get to a couple pieces of advice that I gave out recently on men dealing with heartbreak. I’m sure the majority of the stories out there aren’t too different than these. From: DM Subject: Need your expert advice man please!!! (break up) Message: So my gf of one and a half years just broke up with me. She said she isn’t happy, that we havent been doing well for a long time and that “She loves me, but isn’t in love with me” (whatever that means).. Anyways, we have had problems in our relationship, but i didn’t think that the gravity of which would culminate in this kind of breakup. We talked, and asked her to work it out saying i could change, be the person she needed to give it a chance, but she was having none of it. I know what it seems like, ive been devastated, but i still love this girl, and am not ready to walk away from such a long relationship without a fight. Ive read different places that the only and best way to get back an ex is to go into radio silence for a month and just work on yourself. How should I go about this, i love this girl with all my heart and would give anything to work things out. Im a fucking wreck, but she doesn’t seem to be too distraught (as she put it she’s ‘numb’ to me). What is a way that i can get out of this and at least have a shot at getting back with her. I know i made the mistake of trying to convince her to try it, but we had had fights before and BAM we were in each others arms again. I need some advice on how to make this relationship work again, and not have people tell me to move on, find other fish in the sea etc.. I need help with this one please! Thanks and i look forward to your response. My Response: “i love this girl with all my heart and would give anything to work things out. Im a fucking wreck” This quote here is the sole reason your girl left you. You care about her more than you care about yourself and because of it you’ve become a burden. You’ve become a weight on her shoulders and this is why she now resents you. You’re draining her. You’re free loading off of the energy she brings into your life. Who wouldn’t be numb to a free loader? She’s lost respect for you because you’ve put her desires too far before your own. And once a woman loses respect for you; her love for you goes right out the window. It happens to the best of us so don’t be so hard on yourself. But you must fucking chill. Any action you take from the mindset that you are currently in is going to push her further away from you than she is now. If you make absolutely ZERO attempts to reach out to her again she WILL come back when you least expect it. But remember I said ZERO! So before you do something stupid like send her a 500 word text or give her a call remember that the action will ruin the 100% guarantee that she WILL return if and ONLY if you make ZERO attempts to contact her again. Every attempt at contact after that point reduces the chances of her returning by 50%.. But as long as you do NOT, you have a 100% chance that she will return. I swear to you before God.. No woman is special and they all do the same shit. Work Out, read books, and go hang out with buddies. It’s tough to read with a broken heart i know. Its tough to work out with a broken heart also, but you must power yourself through it man. Its the only way. Just power yourself through making improvements and SHE WILL return when you least expect it. From: EnKay Subject: Need and urgent reply!! I Don’t wanna lose her. ( Break up ) Message: Been dating a girl since november. Had a great start. Havent seen her in 5 weeks. Issues at work etc. ive lost my job and havent been myself. Neither had she. Had a bit if distance. Sent flowers to her for valentines day last week, thiught to restart this. We set tomorrow for a date. Been really excited. Then she sent this: “I tried calling earlier, I’m putting dating on a hold at the minute, not sure what i want. I don’t want to mess you around so thought I would let you know” How do i respond?? I need your help please? My Response: Why would you wanna date a girl if your life is currently a mess? Cut it out bro. Don’t you know that if you’re a mess you will only make the life of another a mess? Why fuck up someone else life just because you’re currently lonely? Get your shit together first bro. These chicks ain’t going NO WHERE. You only want her because its appearing that you can’t have her. TRUST ME. If you had her, you wound’t even want her like you do now. You’re listening to the chemicals reactions in your body that are all created from YOUR OWN thoughts and not the honest logic. Fuck her bro.. Not literary.. Like forget her.. Go on with your life. She’ll come chasing you if you do, but as long as you stay obsessed with her mentally, she’ll know intuitively and want nothing to do with you. Women intuition is 10x stronger than ours – we can’t even imagine what this is like. You have to live your life as if everyone is always watching because they are. If you wouldn’t post on the forums about her with her knowing; don’t do the shit thinking that she won’t know. She’ll feel it. Its a topic I cover in my book. Behave the way you would behave if you had a camera following you everywhere you go linked directly to her television screen and she was watching your every move. Because she kinda is and this will all impact the way she thinks about you when you’re not around. Life is a feeling process. We pick up vibes.. women just pick them shits up stronger. Grow man.. Grow tall and let go. She’ll love you for it. But whatever you do.. DO NOT HIT HER UP! its the worst thing you can do. And she’ll feel less attraction for you and push you further away. - All the best to all of you in recovery. One Love. Eddie Fews |
|
| Author: | CharlesFinley [ Fri Feb 27, 2015 3:34 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Going Through A Break Up? Read This Now |
Great post, Eddie! (long, but great )A lot of the same type of questions/problems on the forum these days - and you've mentioned some of what you've written here in a couple of the threads. I think it's great advice. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|