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Not sure where I stand with her
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Author:  reel2real [ Tue Dec 23, 2014 4:37 am ]
Post subject:  Not sure where I stand with her
I have been dating this girl for 4 months now. She is an awesome catch. Gorgeous, intelligent, and is going to have a really good job when she gets out of school.

At first glance, I was really on the fence about wanting a relationship with her. She can be high maintenance/difficult, however I realize that she's also hard on herself and wants the best things possible which I have a lot of respect for. I think it also comes with the territory of becoming a doctor. I also knew she was talking to other guys, including ones that she previously slept with. I'll admit it did make me uncomfortable at first as I had trust issues due to a previous relationship, but she has shown me her fb conversations with me, which I haven't even asked and even asked me if I cared that she went for coffee with him.

The last hurdle is that she is leaving the state we live in 6 months time to do her med school clerkship in her hometown. That's something that she can't change.

We have talked before about our lives and what we want. She says that she "doesn't want anything serious", but she "wants to be exclusive". She also says that long distance is off the table because it didn't work out for her last time. In fact she just took me to her hometown and got introduced to the parents

I'm not sure what's going on with her. I do want something serious that could lead to marriage/kids that kind of shit. Should I push for a relationship, or should I just keep having fun with her while seeing what else is out there?
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Tue Dec 23, 2014 4:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Not sure where I stand with her
Quote:
just keep having fun with her while seeing what else is out there?
This. Every time.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Wed Dec 24, 2014 3:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Not sure where I stand with her
I don't understand your question.

She wants to be exclusive to you... but you're not sure where you stand with her? That seems pretty evident, doesn't it?

I get that she's going away and long distance isn't an option - but does she still want to be exclusive while you're long distance? I don't get it...

For such a long post it doesn't make sense... Unless it's just early and I need another coffee.
Author:  reel2real [ Wed Dec 24, 2014 7:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Not sure where I stand with her
Quote:
I don't understand your question.

She wants to be exclusive to you... but you're not sure where you stand with her? That seems pretty evident, doesn't it?

I get that she's going away and long distance isn't an option - but does she still want to be exclusive while you're long distance? I don't get it...

For such a long post it doesn't make sense... Unless it's just early and I need another coffee.
Cliffs:

- She wants exclusivity
- Doesn't want a title
- Doesn't want anything serious
- Is going away in 6 months, which turns the relationship to long distance.
- Long distance is off the table for her
- I want something serious.

Is it worth dating her? Should I keep my options open? Or move on? I'm just confused because for me exclusive = bf/gf
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Wed Dec 24, 2014 7:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Not sure where I stand with her
Then no. I say it's worth being fuck buddies with her. Cause you know she's cutting you loose in 6 months.

No title exclusivity means she wants to fuck you but doesn't want you fucking other girls.

If she were THAT into you, she wouldn't mind the label.

My 2 cents.
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