PUA Forum :: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?

Best thing you can do is realize she isn't special and start dating others. She needs to see you for the prize that you are.

I messed up bad with this one, REALLY bad. Got emotionally attached to this girl and completely forgot about game until it was too late. Things were rocky, and then she dumped me before I was able to dump her (I seceded some status there). Now she says she "loves me" and she wants to be "best friends", what ever that means (it doesn't include sex). She has two other guys pursuing her hard and she's on the verge of fucking one of them. I gave her an ultimatum, I'm either #1 or I'm gone (trying to regain lost status). But now I'm thinking I should just cut her off before she decides, build some social proof by dating other girls, and pursue her again in a month or so.

She goes to my school, and we run in the same general social circle, which further complicates things. The guy that she's going to fuck goes to our school too. So even if I cut her off, I'll still see her around and it may be akward. Should I tell her I don't want to be friends (and she can go fuck the other guy) or should I wait it out and see if she chooses me over him?

Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants.
While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc.
If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart.

Quote:

Absolutely fucking genius. I like your style

Ever thought accepting the "best friends" suggestion and work your way through that?
Other women won't make you feel much better and playing with the hearts of other innocent women is not morally right nor that much beneficial to your situation.

I think, accept the friendship and treat her as a friend. Withdraw your sexual attraction from the plate and treat her as your favourite sister. Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants.
While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. You have to be clever with that so she won't understand that she is your focus and not the other woman.
If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart.

If this fails, move on and forget about her. There is a limit in what you can do.

Quote:

Absolutely fucking genius. I like your style

Yeah. I watch youtube channels like tmw and they suggested this once in the friend zone. Once a woman friend zones you, it pretty much means they want to see you with absolutely no chance of a fwb or sexual experience. They still want you hovering around like a bf minus the sex part in exchange for her time.

Quote:

The only thing I don't like about this is it keeps you attached to her and focused on winning her, when you should be cutting her off and focus on moving on with other chicks. I know this is the answer you want to hear, bit this will result in more hurt feelings and being hung up on her for sooooo much longer. So you wanna be the closet friend...just stop. Go bang some other girls, make sure she knows and then see what you want to do.

No offense, but don't get girl advice from a girl.

Author:	pwnyc127 [ Thu Dec 18, 2014 5:16 am ]
Post subject:	Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
I messed up bad with this one, REALLY bad. Got emotionally attached to this girl and completely forgot about game until it was too late. Things were rocky, and then she dumped me before I was able to dump her (I seceded some status there). Now she says she "loves me" and she wants to be "best friends", what ever that means (it doesn't include sex). She has two other guys pursuing her hard and she's on the verge of fucking one of them. I gave her an ultimatum, I'm either #1 or I'm gone (trying to regain lost status). But now I'm thinking I should just cut her off before she decides, build some social proof by dating other girls, and pursue her again in a month or so. She goes to my school, and we run in the same general social circle, which further complicates things. The guy that she's going to fuck goes to our school too. So even if I cut her off, I'll still see her around and it may be akward. Should I tell her I don't want to be friends (and she can go fuck the other guy) or should I wait it out and see if she chooses me over him?

Author:	luvmiddleage [ Thu Dec 18, 2014 12:06 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Best thing you can do is realize she isn't special and start dating others. She needs to see you for the prize that you are.

Author:	CharlesFinley [ Thu Dec 18, 2014 1:39 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: Best thing you can do is realize she isn't special and start dating others. She needs to see you for the prize that you are. ^ This - in so many words. Chasing harder isn't going to help you here. She has options - 3 of them that you know of (yourself included). She's the prize right now. You, sir, need to immediately realize this one isn't special and you just don't have that great of a connection with her if: 1) "Love" doesn't include sex 2) She's playing you against 2 other guys You need to flip this script (as Heywood Jablowme would say) - Put yourself in the driver's seat and have 3 or 4 girls of your own on the go. Believe me, it'll only help your cause here (plus you may not even give a fuck about this one as soon as you've got others around you).

Author:	pwnyc127 [ Fri Dec 19, 2014 12:11 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
I agree and I know this is what I should do, but I'm suffering from major emotional attachment and I'm ass-hurt. I have other girls on the side but I can't stop thinking about this one. From what you guys said I'll infer that you suggest that I take the option of cutting off the friendship before she even gets back to me on the ultimatum.

Author:	oceanx [ Fri Dec 19, 2014 9:12 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Fuck the ultimatum. Cutting the ultimatum is sort of like you flaking on her and may make her offer herself to you for another relationship which may I suggest you reject. Yes, cut the ultimatum before she gets back to you, that's my input. There are billions of women in the world. Chill with some of the other ones besides her for the time being.

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Author:	meetjoeblack [ Sat Dec 20, 2014 4:26 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: I messed up bad with this one, REALLY bad. Got emotionally attached to this girl and completely forgot about game until it was too late. Things were rocky, and then she dumped me before I was able to dump her (I seceded some status there). Now she says she "loves me" and she wants to be "best friends", what ever that means (it doesn't include sex). She has two other guys pursuing her hard and she's on the verge of fucking one of them. I gave her an ultimatum, I'm either #1 or I'm gone (trying to regain lost status). But now I'm thinking I should just cut her off before she decides, build some social proof by dating other girls, and pursue her again in a month or so. She goes to my school, and we run in the same general social circle, which further complicates things. The guy that she's going to fuck goes to our school too. So even if I cut her off, I'll still see her around and it may be akward. Should I tell her I don't want to be friends (and she can go fuck the other guy) or should I wait it out and see if she chooses me over him? Learn me; if a woman dumps you, she is fucking someone else or is in the process of it. It sucks. Tighten up your game. Watch some Johnny Berba and John Cooper. Tyler Durdan has a new vid as well as JB.

Author:	maria_ [ Fri Dec 26, 2014 4:06 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Ever thought accepting the "best friends" suggestion and work your way through that? Other women won't make you feel much better and playing with the hearts of other innocent women is not morally right nor that much beneficial to your situation. I think, accept the friendship and treat her as a friend. Withdraw your sexual attraction from the plate and treat her as your favourite sister. Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants. While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. You have to be clever with that so she won't understand that she is your focus and not the other woman. If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart. If this fails, move on and forget about her. There is a limit in what you can do.

Author:	pwnyc127 [ Tue Dec 30, 2014 8:16 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants. While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart. Absolutely fucking genius. I like your style

Author:	meetjoeblack [ Tue Dec 30, 2014 7:37 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: Quote: Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants. While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart. Absolutely fucking genius. I like your style Yeah. I watch youtube channels like tmw and they suggested this once in the friend zone. Once a woman friend zones you, it pretty much means they want to see you with absolutely no chance of a fwb or sexual experience. They still want you hovering around like a bf minus the sex part in exchange for her time.

Author:	Greggomatik [ Tue Dec 30, 2014 8:24 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: Ever thought accepting the "best friends" suggestion and work your way through that? Other women won't make you feel much better and playing with the hearts of other innocent women is not morally right nor that much beneficial to your situation. I think, accept the friendship and treat her as a friend. Withdraw your sexual attraction from the plate and treat her as your favourite sister. Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants. While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. You have to be clever with that so she won't understand that she is your focus and not the other woman. If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart. If this fails, move on and forget about her. There is a limit in what you can do. The only thing I don't like about this is it keeps you attached to her and focused on winning her, when you should be cutting her off and focus on moving on with other chicks. I know this is the answer you want to hear, bit this will result in more hurt feelings and being hung up on her for sooooo much longer. So you wanna be the closet friend...just stop. Go bang some other girls, make sure she knows and then see what you want to do. No offense, but don't get girl advice from a girl.

Author:	maria_ [ Tue Dec 30, 2014 9:56 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: Quote: Quote: Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants. While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart. Absolutely fucking genius. I like your style Yeah. I watch youtube channels like tmw and they suggested this once in the friend zone. Once a woman friend zones you, it pretty much means they want to see you with absolutely no chance of a fwb or sexual experience. They still want you hovering around like a bf minus the sex part in exchange for her time. The friendzone you have in mind has nothing to do with the friendzone I am talking about. When a woman is friendzoning a man in the beginning then yes it is difficult to get out of it. However, if a woman has slept with a guy ... friendzoning is never always proper friendzoning. She still wants to be a desirable woman in his eyes. She can't accept that another woman can be that even if things are over. For a situation to be final she must have completely grown out of emotions. That takes either lots of years or lots of arguments. That's very hard to happen and it takes lots of time and effort.

Author:	maria_ [ Tue Dec 30, 2014 10:07 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Can my big mistake possibly be fixed?
Quote: Quote: Ever thought accepting the "best friends" suggestion and work your way through that? Other women won't make you feel much better and playing with the hearts of other innocent women is not morally right nor that much beneficial to your situation. I think, accept the friendship and treat her as a friend. Withdraw your sexual attraction from the plate and treat her as your favourite sister. Ask her advice on how to get a new girl. This will automatically make her feel that she is not the centre of attention and that she can't have you anytime she wants. While you are talking about the new girl here and there mention that you want to offer things that you were never offering. If for example she wanted to hold hands and you were refusing...for the other girl you really want to hold hands etc. You have to be clever with that so she won't understand that she is your focus and not the other woman. If she starts trying to get back your attention reject her saying that now you two are friends and nothing more. If she continues trying for a while... give her a kiss and next day tell her that it was a mistake. Play it like that. On/off and slowly making her approach you and win your heart. If this fails, move on and forget about her. There is a limit in what you can do. The only thing I don't like about this is it keeps you attached to her and focused on winning her, when you should be cutting her off and focus on moving on with other chicks. I know this is the answer you want to hear, bit this will result in more hurt feelings and being hung up on her for sooooo much longer. So you wanna be the closet friend...just stop. Go bang some other girls, make sure she knows and then see what you want to do. No offense, but don't get girl advice from a girl. First of all he is still emotionally attached to this woman. He will stop being attached to this woman when he takes the decision that he doesn't want to be attach to this woman. That's how everyone works. Advice like "sleep with 100 women" are like a pain killer for a broken bone. I have seen lots of men leading on women for years and they can't get over the one that got away. Result just a miserable man and lots of broken hearted women. If he follows what you say, he'll always have the "what if... " in his mind. If he fights and he loses he will be able to process it much better than if he never gives it a last chance. That way he will accept that there is nothing more to do and he will sleep with other women and he will be more open to someone that will be worth his time. On the other hand there is a small possibility to actually win her back. Working for short time to get her a bit jealous and ignite again her interest is not closet friend. Closet friend is someone that stays there for years without expressing what he wants. He can give it a go and see if she would chase. Then it is up to him to take the decision when is the time to stop. What if he follows your advice, he goes and sleep with 100 women, he feels numb from feelings then she returns back while he has found someone new and she starts pursuing him? He will have doubts, he will lose his new relationship that could had been better for him... How many men here come and post about the ex that appeared out of nowhere and they still had feelings and they broke off their perfectly good relationship .. for just nothing? The memory of the feeling good factor by the immature ex....

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