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| Long distance relationship issues https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=184012 |
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| Author: | J-Iced [ Thu Sep 25, 2014 12:27 am ] |
| Post subject: | Long distance relationship issues |
Alright to start this off, I'm 23. She's 22. Been dating about a year. I picked her up while practicing game at work and actually like this girl. But I went a little quick not quite knowing how to handle it after my first LR. Things have been confusing for me since, but she's in her senior year of college and I'm 3 states away. We made it work last year, But this year she's in a new place, we're talking less and I'm starting to get clingy and I'm sure I'm bothering her. Very pathetic. So my question is, how do I back off without going too far? And how do I maintain attraction with less time. We just had 3 months as co-workers and spending almost all our free time together, to go down to so little is odd but I'd really like to make this work. I just know I'm a huge problem. I got myself into this without being ready. Advice guys? **edit** Forgot to mention, when this all began, She was a cat on a string, my confusion flipped it. I'm on the string here. No idea how to get that back if I can** |
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| Author: | younglady [ Thu Sep 25, 2014 3:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
You just said she is in senior year in college. As you know, senior year is the most challenging, and the last thing a girl needs while studying is a bunch of emotional distractions. There is no way for us to know your girlfriend's personality since you said nothing about that. Some girls just need some space to finish up the studying, and then they'll be back with you as usual. But other girls drop the boyfriend to get serious about school and their career. You said you're clingy but did not specify how, so I'll give some guidelines. -Do not text her more than once a day. You can text or call at night to let her know you're thinking about her. -Once in a while, record a video of yourself talking and send it to her. That way she will see and hear you. But not too many videos, of course, just maybe once a week or fortnight. It's long distance, if she meets someone else and likes them more than you, there's not much you can do. It's up to her to choose you only. But being clingy will guarantee that she'll get annoyed. You will have to let go of your fear of losing her. If she walks, she walks. Just do right by her for now, but stop worrying. |
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| Author: | Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
Start by doing whatever it was you kept yourself occupied with BEFORE you were up her ass 24/7. Or start a new hobby, work out. Become less available. Answer calls and messages at your leisure, she won't get pissed off if you are busy having a grown up life. Meet other women, have other options in your life. I'll guaran-fucking-tee she does. Be hard to read. Every time she leaves you she should be wondering if she will ever see you again. She should be wondering how much you like her. She should be wondering if you’re seeing other girls. Let her wonder. P.S.- Stop thinking she's had six dicks in her since you've last talked to her. |
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| Author: | satnydj [ Thu Sep 25, 2014 6:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
Quote: P.S.- Stop thinking she's had six dicks in her since you've last talked to her.
Good lord, this is the key to getting away from being an AFC. IN all likelihood, she hasn't even ventured with someone else. And, if she has, you wouldn't want her to be all about you then anyway. Be confident in yourself and it will lead to confidence in your relationship.
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| Author: | J-Iced [ Thu Sep 25, 2014 7:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
Thank you everyone for the advice. I'll keep it all in mind moving forward. As is we talk usually in the morning before we start our days and right before bed, occasionally in between. But I usually send the text when I get out of work or I'm free. I've noticed while she used to do the same, I think she doesn't feel the need to anymore which is fine but my guts been telling me to follow suit and do the same. As for answering calls and texts at my leisure, unless I'm slammed at work, I usually answer within 10 minutes. Once again though, thank you for getting back to me on this. If nothing else its reassuring and I feel more confident moving forward. |
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| Author: | satnydj [ Fri Sep 26, 2014 3:54 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
Quote: As is we talk usually in the morning before we start our days and right before bed, occasionally in between.
Does she initiate any of these conversations?
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| Author: | J-Iced [ Sun Sep 28, 2014 3:00 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
Its about equal. She'll send me a text one day and I'll do it another day. And usually in the middle of the day depending on whats happening. Sometimes its snapchat or a call. |
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| Author: | satnydj [ Mon Sep 29, 2014 6:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Long distance relationship issues |
That sounds pretty normal to me for a relationship. How difficult is it to make a plan sometime to see her (if that is what you want). If you are in about a year of the relationship, I don't see an issue in planning to hang out there, or (if possible) her come to you. Don't like plan the trip etc, and just say I'm coming to see you. Seems like you should be able to talk with her about it, if being away is that hard for you. Also, LDR suck and you have to be used to not seeing each other and talking all the time. Hell, I don't even talk to or see my own gf all of the time and we live like 3 miles from each other. Just stay cool, and find things to do where you are to occupy the time that used to be taken up by her. |
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