| PUA Forum https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=183233 |
Page 1 of 2 |
| Author: | lowriderzzz [ Sat Aug 30, 2014 1:04 am ] |
| Post subject: | How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
I simply say to her: "don't talk with him/close the phone - you are with me now". And if she doesn't respect that, then I'm leaving for my own business to do. She then starts making excuses and playing upset. I try not to get affected. Since for me its the right thing to do. Her ex is gone and i'm not going to tolerate them maintaining relationship, while we have one. I don't do it from point of jealousy I do it from point of respect and that way I subcomunicate that I value myself and her. Just was curious how do you think about it ? What's your move in such situations? |
|
| Author: | acetheartist [ Sat Aug 30, 2014 1:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
i think you did good maybe you should stage a break up and get her to realise how much she likes you |
|
| Author: | musolini [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 5:41 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Actually all you did is show how insecure you are. Thats a huge turn off for girls. You have to understand that women do not rationalize like men. It may take her time to get closure and she does it in her own way. So respect her in a way she deserves and if you cant do that then move on. |
|
| Author: | lowriderzzz [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 6:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: Actually all you did is show how insecure you are. Thats a huge turn off for girls.
And what made you think that i'm insecure? (i'm not nibbling you) You have to understand that women do not rationalize like men. It may take her time to get closure and she does it in her own way. So respect her in a way she deserves and if you cant do that then move on. I know that women don't rationalize like men and haven't tried to convince her by logic. Of course that I respect her. If did't respected her I would't be with her and wouldn't mind who is she talking with. I'm not willing to control her, but I had to let her know that i'm not like all the other men "friends" she has. |
|
| Author: | GamesSN [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 6:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Man... One word: Baggage. Chicks that are close with their ex's or keep in touch have shit tonnes of baggage. They are not worthy of being in a relationship if they can't move on from an ex and the same goes for guys. There are very rare scenarios when a girl and an ex are simply just friends and that's generally only when they've both moved on amicably and have been friends for years, are both grown up and both in committed relationships. Even at that it's extremely hard for anyone to know exactly what's going on. I would honestly say about 10% of the men and women you see out there that are "just friends" with ex's are actually just friends. So as soon as your girlfriend is hitting up ex boyfriends and getting butt hurt over you being bothered by it you need to lay down the law, tell them you don't think it's cool and lay your cards on the table straight up. If any shit starts happening after that dump her ass. This isn't being "insecure" it's having common sense and realising male to female dynamics. If you have previous relations with someone and you care about them enough to keep in touch unconsciously you're keeping them on the side for a random romp at least you are at the back of your mind, especially if the sex was good. Take the initiative, state your expectations in relationships before committing. |
|
| Author: | lowriderzzz [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 6:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: Man... One word: Baggage.
Yes I agree with that. I basically told her if you want to keep in touch with him, better don't keep in touch with me... either I should also keep in touch with my ex gfs... Chicks that are close with their ex's or keep in touch have shit tonnes of baggage. They are not worthy of being in a relationship if they can't move on from an ex and the same goes for guys. There are very rare scenarios when a girl and an ex are simply just friends and that's generally only when they've both moved on amicably and have been friends for years, are both grown up and both in committed relationships. Even at that it's extremely hard for anyone to know exactly what's going on. I would honestly say about 10% of the men and women you see out there that are "just friends" with ex's are actually just friends. So as soon as your girlfriend is hitting up ex boyfriends and getting butt hurt over you being bothered by it you need to lay down the law, tell them you don't think it's cool and lay your cards on the table straight up. If any shit starts happening after that dump her ass. This isn't being "insecure" it's having common sense and realizing male to female dynamics. If you have previous relations with someone and you care about them enough to keep in touch unconsciously you're keeping them on the side for a random romp at least you are at the back of your mind, especially if the sex was good. Take the initiative, state your expectations in relationships before committing. As a matter of fact I still do... not in the presence of new girls though. (perhaps I should try doing it) |
|
| Author: | GamesSN [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 7:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
You just sound insecure, man. The reason why you should call a chick out isn't because of insecurities it's to have a healthy relationship. Basically telling her you'll talk to your ex's is trying to one up her when you should have a "matter of fact" attitude and be fully willing to drop her ass without trying to get the last word in. Your mentality should be "She's not relationship material. I'll either drop her or downgrade her to FWB." none of this "I want to make her jealous so she'll stop and think of me" stuff. |
|
| Author: | neo87 [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 7:22 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: You just sound insecure, man.
Gamesn is giving you solid advice. It's not insecure for someone to expect certain actions in a healthy relationship.
The reason why you should call a chick out isn't because of insecurities it's to have a healthy relationship. Basically telling her you'll talk to your ex's is trying to one up her when you should have a "matter of fact" attitude and be fully willing to drop her ass without trying to get the last word in. Your mentality should be "She's not relationship material. I'll either drop her or downgrade her to FWB." none of this "I want to make her jealous so she'll stop and think of me" stuff. |
|
| Author: | lowriderzzz [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 11:15 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: You just sound insecure, man.
Its not about I want to make her jealous. Thats stupid. The reason why you should call a chick out isn't because of insecurities it's to have a healthy relationship. Basically telling her you'll talk to your ex's is trying to one up her when you should have a "matter of fact" attitude and be fully willing to drop her ass without trying to get the last word in. Your mentality should be "She's not relationship material. I'll either drop her or downgrade her to FWB." none of this "I want to make her jealous so she'll stop and think of me" stuff. Its more like fairness question. I don't talk to my ex when we r together, so it will not be fair for her to do so neither. |
|
| Author: | neo87 [ Sun Aug 31, 2014 11:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: Quote: You just sound insecure, man.
Its not about I want to make her jealous. Thats stupid. The reason why you should call a chick out isn't because of insecurities it's to have a healthy relationship. Basically telling her you'll talk to your ex's is trying to one up her when you should have a "matter of fact" attitude and be fully willing to drop her ass without trying to get the last word in. Your mentality should be "She's not relationship material. I'll either drop her or downgrade her to FWB." none of this "I want to make her jealous so she'll stop and think of me" stuff. Its more like fairness question. I don't talk to my ex when we r together, so it will not be fair for her to do so neither. Quote: Her ex is gone and i'm not going to tolerate them maintaining relationship, while we have one.
Quote: either I should also keep in touch with my ex gfs...
It looks insecure because your reasoning is changing.
As a matter of fact I still do |
|
| Author: | lowriderzzz [ Mon Sep 01, 2014 6:22 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: Quote: Quote: You just sound insecure, man.
Its not about I want to make her jealous. Thats stupid. The reason why you should call a chick out isn't because of insecurities it's to have a healthy relationship. Basically telling her you'll talk to your ex's is trying to one up her when you should have a "matter of fact" attitude and be fully willing to drop her ass without trying to get the last word in. Your mentality should be "She's not relationship material. I'll either drop her or downgrade her to FWB." none of this "I want to make her jealous so she'll stop and think of me" stuff. Its more like fairness question. I don't talk to my ex when we r together, so it will not be fair for her to do so neither. Quote: Her ex is gone and i'm not going to tolerate them maintaining relationship, while we have one.
Quote: either I should also keep in touch with my ex gfs...
It looks insecure because your reasoning is changing.As a matter of fact I still do But anyway it was insightful. Whats a good way to find exactly what insecticides are and what to do about it ? |
|
| Author: | Killzie [ Mon Sep 01, 2014 7:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
People don't go where they aren't wanted bruh. Where there's smoke there's fire etc. I'm sure you understand. Their relationship isn't over but yours is on the brink. She keeps him around not necessarily because she likes him better but because she plans on going back to him in the future. She did what a a previous poster said to do. She staged a break up. Never do this because it's feminine as fuck. But she did it to show her boyfriend what he is missing and he of course followed the beta male script and went with it. Don't drop this bitch but instead start talking to other girls and cold approaching again. It will work wonders. Cold approach cures almost everything. |
|
| Author: | lowriderzzz [ Mon Sep 01, 2014 11:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: People don't go where they aren't wanted bruh. Where there's smoke there's fire etc. I'm sure you understand. Their relationship isn't over but yours is on the brink. She keeps him around not necessarily because she likes him better but because she plans on going back to him in the future. She did what a a previous poster said to do. She staged a break up. Never do this because it's feminine as fuck. But she did it to show her boyfriend what he is missing and he of course followed the beta male script and went with it. Don't drop this bitch but instead start talking to other girls and cold approaching again. It will work wonders. Cold approach cures almost everything.
I still approach new girls, and I haven't stated her that we break up if she keeps in touch with him.I know I can't control her and I don't want. I know that if she wants to keep in touch with him she can easy do it without me knowing, so whats the point of me trying to stop that. I know I don't have control over it. I just don't get good with the idea of when 2 ppl are out together one of them to talk for more than 10 mins random talk (not something serious: life/death case) with someone else. It doesn't matter if its bf gf relationship or just 2 friends. |
|
| Author: | odyn [ Mon Sep 01, 2014 7:49 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Dude I can speak from experience that playing it cool is not always the way to go. Ex left me for her ex of around three years prior. When I found out she was speaking to him at a bar before she broke it off I acted like I didn't give a fuck and told her I hope she had fun etc. Month later he was in and I was out....set clear boundries don't be mean or give ultimatums like if you talk to him we are through etc. Just tell her then show her its not alright to be talking to him. |
|
| Author: | GamesSN [ Mon Sep 01, 2014 8:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How u deal when she wants to talk to her ex bf. |
Quote: Dude I can speak from experience that playing it cool is not always the way to go. Ex left me for her ex of around three years prior. When I found out she was speaking to him at a bar before she broke it off I acted like I didn't give a fuck and told her I hope she had fun etc. Month later he was in and I was out....set clear boundries don't be mean or give ultimatums like if you talk to him we are through etc. Just tell her then show her its not alright to be talking to him.
Perfect advice based on valid experience.Similar happened to me at one point. If it's your girlfriend you need to have clear boundaries. If it's a girl you're not fucking but still in the process of gaming act like everything is cool when she's genuinely trying to get your attention by talking to other guys then go to other women. If some guy is hitting on your target then go to another girl to get at her but only do it as much to demonstrate that you can have other women if you wanted to then pay your target enough attention to reel her back in and away from the guy hitting on her. She'll see you have more value and more immediate options and break off from the guy. If she's the only girl there... I'm kind of stumped on what to do in those situations but they're rare. |
|
| Page 1 of 2 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|