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Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
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Author:  thorg [ Mon Apr 28, 2014 12:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
Got a GF of 2+ years, living together. The relationship isn't working out, we're just different people, and I want to break up. She thinks I am the one, she hasn't got the abundance perspective. We nearly broke up 2-3 times, but always made up in the end. I always get soft when she cries, especially since she has some health problems to deal with in her life too. The biggest problem is that I'm afraid that she will harm herself. I love her as a person and want to make it easier for her.

I would like some tips on how to decrease her attraction, so that she won't be so hurt when the relationship ends. I feel that it's worth my time and energy if it is possible.

Has anyone tried turning into beta?

Plan A) Become a clingy beta.
I think this would be a 360° turn and feel unnatural, she knows me well by now... She would be glad if I called and talked to her more. I'm not sure if I could pull off being her little doggie and being clingy 24/7. What do you think?

Plan B) Become a boring beta
I have thought of some more gradual ways of decreasing her attraction. I know some of these ideas may sound funny, but they are sincere thoughts.
- spending more time on the computer
- getting drunk with friends more
- starting to play a lot of video games - I know it's very unattractive trait to her
- smoke with friends - same
- stop taking care of the household, leave dirty dishes and clothes around
- watch more porn and let her find out
- have less sex
- appear as a loser to her family
- be greedy about money

What do you think, do you have any relevant experience? Any other tips or plans?

I don't want to break her heart, just for her to lose attraction and interest in the relationship.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Apr 28, 2014 1:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
Instead of playing games, just be straight forward, tell her how you feel, and Man up and dump her.

There is no easy way out. The ignore her 'till she goes away approach never works.

It will be a lot easier on you both.

Breaking up is hard to do, but there is only one way to break up with someone; in person. If you don't, you are a coward who obviously has neither the integrity, nor the sincerity, to tell her that your relationship is over.
Author:  thorg [ Mon Apr 28, 2014 2:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
Quote:
There is no easy way out. The ignore her 'till she goes away approach never works.
Well my ideas weren't to ignore her. I know that the common phrase is to just do it and there is no other or better way.

However I think it's an oversimplification of things. You can learn how to build girls attraction, there surely are ways to decrease it too. :) It's just a topic not as popular for obvious reasons, and hasn't been explored so much. It can't be that hard.

After doing some searches on the forum, two or so guys reported that meeting up less and less with the girl worked for them. Unfortunately I can't do that since we live together.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Apr 28, 2014 3:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
I meant ignoring the situation.

Are you worried she might get emotional when you tell her the sad truth?
Author:  AFCToTheMax [ Mon Apr 28, 2014 4:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
If you don't care about her and ACT like a beta it won't come off as a genuine chode. She will not lose any attraction. She will be like "Aaaaaw that's cute"
Author:  do8 [ Tue Apr 29, 2014 6:54 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
Quote:
The biggest problem is that I'm afraid that she will harm herself.
did she ever threaten you about that?
i'd call it bullshit, if she did
Author:  thorg [ Tue Apr 29, 2014 7:51 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
Quote:
Quote:
The biggest problem is that I'm afraid that she will harm herself.
did she ever threaten you about that?
i'd call it bullshit, if she did
She talked about it a few times, and most times not in a threatening manner, and not (just) in connection with a breakup. The breakup would be an extra weight, and it would be good for it to not be so heavy, hence the thread.
Author:  do8 [ Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
The biggest problem is that I'm afraid that she will harm herself.
did she ever threaten you about that?
i'd call it bullshit, if she did
She talked about it a few times, and most times not in a threatening manner, and not (just) in connection with a breakup. The breakup would be an extra weight, and it would be good for it to not be so heavy, hence the thread.
then call it bullshit. she is asking for your attention this way, very bad way to do so

once my dear tried this on me, got mad and asked to STFU or go for it. Never heard it again
Author:  lizardking [ Tue Apr 29, 2014 1:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Decrease her attraction before breakup - how to be beta
My ex wife did the I'm going off to kill myself thing when we split up for the second time. Unsurpisingly she didnt and I was sucker enough to buy it.

She's insecure. Being clingy is giving her what you want. Becoming boring or witholding sex, apart from it taking forever to end the relationship, will just make her feel rejected and increase the chances of her acting stupid.

If you want a clean break for everyone then do it alpha, not beta. Tell her what you are doing and then do it. Hurts like hell for a few days but beats a long, slow death.

Sorry, man, but I think what you are suggesting is a bit cruel even though you think you are making it easy. Dont draw it out.
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