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| Losing girlfriend,NEED ADVICE!!!!! https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=174336 |
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| Author: | Giga669 [ Thu Jan 16, 2014 6:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Losing girlfriend,NEED ADVICE!!!!! |
Me and my girlfriend were fighting for the last 2 months,and today she decided she wants some time alone,like we didn't break up but she wnats time "for herself" to calm down..Now i told her she is doing a stupid decsion cause im sorry and all that,but she said she wants to rest so i said k have fun.. What do you think i need to do or not to next..This is urgent guys dont want to f*ck up Thx in advance |
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| Author: | neo87 [ Thu Jan 16, 2014 6:38 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Losing girlfriend,NEED ADVICE!!!!! |
What were the fights about? |
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| Author: | SgtMack [ Thu Jan 16, 2014 11:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Losing girlfriend,NEED ADVICE!!!!! |
Giga, It's hard to give you a specific approach without more details, but here's the best general approach. You should relax, first of all. Women are emotional creatures. Don't let her wild ups and downs dictate how you feel. You must be the centered one. A man's centeredness will often calm a woman down. It may not happen right away, so just give it time and stay centered. Second, women will often get hijacked by their emotions and say needy or hurtful things when they're upset that they don't actually mean. You must read between the lines to figure out what she actually needs in the moment. She usually just needs some reassurance that you love her and care for her and find her attractive. However, if you are the clingy, needy type, or if you have done anything egregious to hurt the relationship (cheating, lying, etc.) and any of those things are the reason for her discontent, that will not apply. And you'll have some self-evaluation to do. Next, you need to figure out if she is actually looking for space, or if she's just saying that and expressing a need for something else. It is more likely the former. If so, give her space and take this time to do things you enjoy to distract you from the relationship issues. Most importantly, spend time with friends and run the situation by them to get some input. But listen to your own gut the most. Often explaining the situation to a friend will greatly clarify it to you and the answers will become apparent. Good Luck! |
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| Author: | Apples185 [ Sat Jan 18, 2014 6:06 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Losing girlfriend,NEED ADVICE!!!!! |
Let me guess....you don't want to lose her because she is so HOT. Am I right? |
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| Author: | n2thevoid [ Sat Jan 18, 2014 9:15 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Losing girlfriend,NEED ADVICE!!!!! |
I too wonder if the NEED is truly space, or if it's something else such as the NEED to feel understood. If I had to hedge my bets I'd say it was more the later, in which case some empathy would do the trick. Often times a partner will ask for space because they're dealing with a great deal of frustration in feeling understood by their partner. When there's a lack of understanding, there's a lack of connection. The false need for space is so she can process through the pain, only to return to the same pattern where given enough time, she'll feel that need again for 'space'. Until you've addressed the true need of being understood, the situation will only worsen. |
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