Thanks for the response. I'm not that pissed that she made out with him. Like you said we weren't exclusive at all or even really began to date. I'm just wondering if I'm setting myself up to get hurt in the future because of her neediness and emotional baggage. Not to mention I now get worried whenever she drinks. It now concerns me how far she was willing to go with me on our first date and I've drank with her a few times since then. She's EXTREMELY touchy and can't seem to control herself that well. When I read her Facebook messages the guy even said that subtlety was not her strong suit.

And I wasn't planning on confronting her really. Just have a talk about it since I've noticed she acted kinda weird when I brought him up. Their recent convos havent really been flirty. Just her venting about work and sharing music. If i do end up talking to her about it would it be irrational to tell her I don't like her talking to or hanging out with him? I mean, I kinda see it as disrespectful if she does and I already feel a bit disrespected since she talks about him sometimes and I even gave him a ride a couple weeks ago. It shows me that she obviously didnt feel too bad about it even though she told him she regretted it since he had a gf. If she felt so bad, why smoke with him a couple weeks later and still talk to him? Obviously I could come off as beta but I'm in the mindset of not caring about losing her. Hell, I'm already seriously considering dumping her.

I don't understand what you are saying...why would you get hurt because of her emotional baggage and neediness? You shouldn't be worried about getting hurt because it seems like you are young. Instead you should accept the fact that this relationship will probably end at some point and instead just enjoy it while it lasts.

What do you worry about when she drinks? That she's going to get horny and maybe make out with some guy? Yea it's possible. If you really want to be a superior man instead of worrying about how to catch her or whether she will or she won't...instead just don't worry about it at all. I know, it's revolutionary and goes against what 99% of men will tell you....but if you really want to be good with women and always have the upper hand in your relationships and be happy and not worry....then you have to learn that sexual jealousy, as powerful as it can be, is useless for your well being. Your first mistake was making this "official." Every time you do something like that the emotions you have now are the inevitable result, followed by you "confronting" or "talking" to her about it and then her doing something to "disrespect" you by violating your rules, followed by a messy breakup.

Break that cycle. Don't worry about what she's doing when she's not with you. What does her giving some guy a ride have anything to do with you let alone disrespect you? Get your own alternative women to hang out with.

You should also do a search on Madonna Whore complex since you are judging her for going far with you on the first date. You are "worried" because it shows she is horny and sexual and could also be that way independent of you. You know what? You are absolutely right! Women are horny, they love sex, and if you want to be good with women you have to love this about them instead of worrying about it or judging them for it. You are damn right that she doesn't feel too bad about making out with him - young women live in the moment - you can give her a bunch of rules for no reason that she bound to break - or you can have fun with her and not take the relationship too seriously.

I know it's hard because you already made it "official" and that's the point where the relationship becomes less fun and more about "rules" and "respect" so next time you meet a girl you like, don't ever be the one to make it "official." Frame yourself as a lover of women who doesn't judge them or make rules for them to follow, and they will love you for it.

Do not dump. She's done nothing wrong. Since you made it official, she has stayed faithful.

Stop stalking. If you are suspicious and convinced she is cheating, it's better to show up on a night out and catch her in the act than stalk her Facebook. You are betraying her trust by hacking her Facebook. There's no excuse for that. How would you feel if she hacked yours?

Yeah they still talk but it seems mostly platonic. What I view as a red flag is like the previous poster mentioned, she always has to have a man in her life. Not to mention she can't handle her shit when drunk. Things have been going really good which makes this suck even more because I'm just trying to protect myself from possibly getting hurt in the future.

She does have a lot of issues. Depression/anxiety, daddy issues, sexual abuse. She sees a therapist and takes meds. Hasn't gone crazy on me or anything and I really want to help her and be there for her. This new development is kind of just too much though. Don't know whether I should talk about it and give her a chanceor just bail before I invest more time and money.

Shes depressed has daddy issues and has past history with sexual abuse? This is definitely going to work out.

I understand where you're coming from and I agree and disagree. You don't trust her because you found out she lied to you and it sounds like she has issues. Sounds like you're stuck in a messed up situation where nothing has really happened but all signs point to things turning out badly down the line. Has she ever cheated on anyone? Sounds like she has told you alot about her relationships so do you think she has cheated in the past?

You should have SOME idea of the type of person she is. No psycho analysing her issues and what COULD happen.... can you trust HER? From how she is with YOU, do you have any thoughts that she has lied to you or would lie to you? How old are you and her, and what have your past rs been like? As you said, it seems like you're afraid of getting hurt so you MAY be seeing more into things. From what you know of her is she the type to get drunk and cheat? From what you know about her can you at least understand why she may have kept the co worker thing a secret?

This is a weird situation because you could be right and she could hurt you soon. Only you know this girl. If you can't trust her, don't be with her, but think about it first; whether she just can't be trusted or if her lifestyle makes it hard to. If you can't get bad thoughts out of your head about her, do whats best for you and leave.

I'm rambling because I'm confused here. From your posts and the way you flip flopped, some of this YOU. But, I don't believe in being in a relationship that makes you worry all the time. I guess my main pt is, you have trust issues so maybe it is best that you be with someone who is honest from the beginning and who doesn't go out and get drunk. Good luck.

Sounds like this chick suffers from the Love Bug. Constantly becoming enamoured by different men and driving them off with her affection? She needs help from a professional to sift through her issues.

I would ditch her. Sounds like a nut job.