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| Shit test or a red flag? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=160489 |
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| Author: | Gioo [ Mon Apr 15, 2013 3:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Shit test or a red flag? |
Salut guys. When I was a straight AFC, I was really needy. I always let my girlfriends do whatever they wanted to because I thought I was going to lose them, I didn't want to lose them. Thanks to the community I could improve in so many ways. Four months ago I started going out with a Muslim girl (She is the second Muslim girl that I had a relationship with). We are a great couple. My girl was marry before. She got divorced. I don't know if you guys have been in a relationship with a Muslim girl but they like to be somewhat free. Since they're not able to do that in their country. My girl is really pretty and I know that guys are going to talk to her, that's not my issue. The issue is that she is a manager of a store and guys go and talk to her. It's okay with me. But couple of days ago she told me that a really handsome guy went and talk to her. So the guy goes to our college and she told me that if I was not her boyfriend she should have considered going out with him. I just looked at her and asked her “Really?". She told me that she just wanted to see my reaction. My cousin broke up with his girlfriend and that girl is friend of my girl. Last night my girl texted me that they were together. I didn't have a problem, I am extremely sick thanks to spring season. I just told her to have fun. At 1 a.m she told me that she was at the strip club. Once again I told her to have fun and I meant it. At 4 in the morning she texted me that she messed up and she needed my help. I called her. She didn't pick up. She texted me that she was drunk. But a friend was taking her home. I don't know what friend. She hasn't answered my phone calls. Now this its the thing, her social circle is huge and a lot of her female friends told her to explore since she only been with one guy, I'm the second one in her life. I'm not jealous, but I don't want to lose control of the situation. Am I giving her to much freedom? Once again I don't really care of her friends. I just don't know if she is doing this because she wants me to care more and be jealous or if she really want to explore. Also she told me she really wanted to be with me. I'm just not the type of guy that will tell her don't have friends, I have female friends and I would not like that she tells me that I can't talk to them. I told her that she is a woman and she knows what's right and what's wrong. I'm not going to be behind her back watching her moves. I told her that when we started dating. What do you guys think? |
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| Author: | Rough Operator [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 1:20 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
I think the whole saying another guy is handsome is probably a bit of a shit test, ignore it. I also think you need to know the "I messed up" means before you can go jumping to conclusions. |
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| Author: | Mak [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:43 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
Your supposed to set the boundaries for your woman. If you don't she'll be over the place. Be a man. |
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| Author: | Gioo [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 4:21 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
Quote: I think the whole saying another guy is handsome is probably a bit of a shit test, ignore it.
I also think you need to know the "I messed up" means before you can go jumping to conclusions. Thanks my friend for your reply. I just talked to her. She was drunk last night. It's the first time that she drank like that since she been with me. That's the reason why she said she messed up. Also what should I do about her metting guys randomly? Honestly I don't mind but guys nowadays don't respect if a girl says I have a boyfriend. |
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| Author: | detox75 [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 4:34 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
Quote: Honestly I don't mind but guys nowadays don't respect if a girl says I have a boyfriend.
Guys never have, this hasn't changed in the last million years, dont fool yourself, its opportunity meets compliance. Guys will always run over a AFC with a willing chick, this issue is on her not "guys nowadays", set boundaries and stop accepting lame excuses and supplicating.
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| Author: | speed26 [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 7:54 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
Hi guys I am new here. I have one question How to I lay down the boundary for our relationship without expressing that I am insecure or jealous or controlling. |
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| Author: | RiRi [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 8:05 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
First of all, you SHOULD be concerned based on the pattern you've described. Human nature is a powerful thing and you are catering to her innate desire to "explore." It's easy to say, "well if she really cares about him she'll appreciate the freedom." In some cases yes. In your case, no. She's been sheltered and lacks experience...and on top of that, her friends are encouraging her to venture out. Bad situation for you my friend. One way to combat this issue is to talk to her about how she feels about everything going on. Does she want to explore a little bit and see whats out there? Is she unhappy with her relationship with you? Do her friends like you? Respect you? These are all really important questions that you obviously haven't asked. Let's say she is just being influenced by friends. The first thing you should do is hang out with her and her friends more. They need to like you to support the relationship...and most girls go in that direction if they like the guy. I think we can come to the conclusion that either A: They don't know you or B: They don't like you or respect you for whatever reason. Get some questions answered on her end and think about how you want to go about it. Its too vague a situation at the moment. |
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| Author: | Gioo [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 6:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
[qAte="RiRi"]First of all, you SHOULD be concerned based on the pattern you've described. Human nature is a powerful thing and you are catering to her innate desire to "explore." It's easy to say, "well if she really cares about him she'll appreciate the freedom." In some cases yes. In your case, no. She's been sheltered and lacks experience...and on top of that, her friends are encouraging her to venture out. Bad situation for you my friend. One way to combat this issue is to talk to her about how she feels about everything going on. Does she want to explore a little bit and see whats out there? Is she unhappy with her relationship with you? Do her friends like you? Respect you? These are all really important questions that you obviously haven't asked. Let's say she is just being influenced by friends. The first thing you should do is hang out with her and her friends more. They need to like you to support the relationship...and most girls go in that direction if they like the guy. I think we can come to the conclusion that either A: They don't know you or B: They don't like you or respect you for whatever reason. Get some questions answered on her end and think about how you want to go about it. Its too vague a situation at the moment.[/quote] Thank you for your response my friend. I did ask her about the exploring part. She said that she found everything with me. She does not need to explore, that was what she said. About the friends part, I'm not to close with them. That's something I may want to work on. We are working pretty good together. Just that thing of she meeting guys because of her store got me thinking. I'm guessing she wanted me to see me jealous. I understood that was a shit test. Definitely my friend I would work in getting along with her friends. They know her for years so I can tell the influence that they have over her. |
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| Author: | Gioo [ Tue Apr 16, 2013 7:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Shit test or a red flag? |
Quote: Quote: Honestly I don't mind but guys nowadays don't respect if a girl says I have a boyfriend.
Guys never have, this hasn't changed in the last million years, dont fool yourself, its opportunity meets compliance. Guys will always run over a AFC with a willing chick, this issue is on her not "guys nowadays", set boundaries and stop accepting lame excuses and supplicating.I'm not jealous and I think that bothers her sometimes, because she is. I don't supplicate I just didn't understand that part. Well my friend thank you. Now I know how to approach her regarding her guys friends. |
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