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| 2nd chance LTR failing https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=156498 |
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| Author: | harare [ Sun Feb 10, 2013 3:20 pm ] |
| Post subject: | 2nd chance LTR failing |
Hi everyone, i ll try to make my story short and understandable (english is my 2nd language) as possible. I was in 2,5 years long relationship with girl that was my best female friend for few years longer. Relationship was quite good and we were making long term plans. However around last summer, things was going south so she asked for a break. I didnt want it but still didnt make any drama about it and just instantly went strict NC. We didnt hear each other for about 4 months, and then she initiated contact and asked me for a drink. Firsty i simply rejected it, but she was persistent so we met a month later. There was a lot of chemistry in the air on our meeting but i told her that i dont want a relationship. But she became even more persistant, and literaly begged me back so after some time I fell for it and took her back. (i never lost feelings for her during our break). At first she was rushing things fast but i didnt really have anything against it. So we had 1 month honeymoon phase. And suddenly she started to act distant. She have lot of work so i wasnt really upset about it. But after some time i became a bit annoyed and called her for a drink and told her that i have full respect for her duties but that i would like to make some time for me also. She said ok, but only thing that changed was that she contacted me even less. So i told her that maybe we rushed things too fast so we should slow down and that I dont want her to feel pressured in relationship, and she agreed. And after that, I didnt hear from her. I dont initiate contact either. So basicly we are now ignoring each other, even on IM when we are both online. I m ready to move on, but still don t want to move on if there is any chance for repair things. So i guess waiting for her to initiate contact and show that she is willing to try to work out things between us is only possible solution? Any advice is very much appriciated. EDIT: forgot to mention that when we had our last conversation i openly asked her if she wants to continue relationship, and she told : yes without any hesitation. |
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| Author: | vhou812 [ Mon Feb 11, 2013 11:44 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 2nd chance LTR failing |
You're beyond gaming. Go direct. Tell her you're don't like the ambiguity and would like to know if you are supposed to be committed to her, or if it is fine for you to see other people. Use the IM thing as an example and tell her you dislike not being able to do something because you aren't sure of the level of appropriateness. Either shit should get better, or you should end up with a clear understanding. Keep in mind that too much drama and all that will kill even a great relationship full of chemistry. You both should benefit from it, not feel like you get bogged down from it. |
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| Author: | sg777 [ Wed Feb 13, 2013 6:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 2nd chance LTR failing |
I'd do nothing. She has already affirmed that she wants to be with you. You can ask the same question is a thousand different ways, but you are driving yourself crazy. Enjoy the time you have now. She is distant because you are hounding her, you are giving her reasons to pull away, you are pushing. Start doing things for yourself, stop asking questions, become secure that you are the man and she is lucky to have you. How do you this? It goes back to smile until you believe it, think and tell yourself that you are the shit, eventually you will believe it. People love being around confidence. |
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| Author: | harare [ Sun Feb 17, 2013 5:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 2nd chance LTR failing |
Well, i also thought that i m beyond gaming, but looks like there is nothing to do... After we havent seen each other for 2 weeks (and had quite low contact) i asked her to meet up on dinner (it was V-day and i had job interview so i thought i would be appropriate)... She agreed without hesitation, but then canceled it beacuse of work. Conversation was kinda: Her: Sorry i have blahblahblah, please don t be mad, please,please,please... Me: Ok Her: Are you mad? Me: Nope, it would be better if you told me earlier, but never mind. Anyway you missing great food and even better company Her: Really sorry again, I ll call you when I m done with work. Me: Ok It was 3 days ago, not a word from her... Guess time to move on... :/ |
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