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| I need to work on my weak inner-game. https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=155170 |
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| Author: | Mayhem_ [ Sat Jan 19, 2013 6:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | I need to work on my weak inner-game. |
I've been dating for 2 months now and I'm really getting tired of my weakness, I'm great at hiding things but fuck, that's not the way i wanna avoid situations or clear them up every single time. Every time i become attached to something of high value (a girl) I become softer and softer to a point where i even brainwash myself over small things. I catch myself being jealous something, it's because of the value I hold, but it has it's effect on the way i handle another situation, if i get jealous over something, i'll unsubconsciously try to get some kind of revenge, it's ridiculous. My girl texts, i take my phone and start texting, she goes out, i wanna go out. It's like a feeling i get and after that i realize it's pure weakness. When i entered the relationship i entered with full confidence, because i was happy with everything i had, the direction my life was heading and i was succesful with girls. There were no empty spaces. How would you handle jealousy, what can i do to realize shit aint even true, why cant i stop being afraid of losing my girl? |
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| Author: | Heartnet [ Sat Jan 19, 2013 8:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I need to work on my weak inner-game. |
Tyler actually made a video on this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNovswAl ... w&index=42 |
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| Author: | Rough Operator [ Sat Jan 19, 2013 11:24 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I need to work on my weak inner-game. |
I am very similar when actually in a relationship with someone I care for. I end up analysing tiny things, overthinking everything, jumping to conclusions without any evidence. But I am reading this EXCELLENT book called "The Chimp Paradox" by Dr. Steve Peters, it essentially teaches you to think that there are two entities in your head; your logical, calm, collected mind or "human" and your emotional, primitive mind or your "chimp." It's such a useful model for understanding how and why you sometimes have these ridiculous thoughts and illogical insecurities when your far stronger "chimp" takes over from your "human." It sounds kind of ridiculous when talking about your chimp and your human living inside your head, but you can easily replace it with logical and emotional minds. The most important thing is that it teaches you how to exorcise your paranoid, jealous, territorial emotional mind and allow your reason and logic to take over. You will literally find yourself thinking "My chimp is starting to take over now" next time you're under stress and you will begin to get it under control. But it's no use using willpower to suppress your emotional mind, it won't work and your insecurities will come out WAY stronger another time. I would recommend reading that book and also doing stuff to work on your inner game in the mean time. |
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