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Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
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Author:  carib [ Sat Jan 12, 2013 3:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
I mean not absolutely or entirely, but I've been thinking about this lately and the more I think about it, the more I feel like people in relationships are in them because they're insecure. Maybe they have an emptiness or void in them and they try to fill those insecurities with someone who counts on and admires them. Someone who'll always tell them they look good, who'll always be there for them during their emotional struggles, be there to comfort and console them.

I look at my life and I'm not in a relationship, nor do I want one and I'm happy being single for a long time. I'm even rather be out of sex for months then be in a relationship with a girl and get it 5 times a day. The key is that regardless of the situation I'm in, I'm happy and confident and don't need a relationship to fill some void I have in me.

And plus, gaming girls is super fun and adventurous.

edit: just to verify, I didn't say everyone in a relationship is insecure. It really depends on your framework and self-image. I'm just basing it on the premise that most of the time when someone breaks up they all of the sudden feel ugly, worthless, weak, needy, and insecure. Why is that, because they were harbouring those emotions all along and masking them through their relationship.
Author:  R.C [ Sat Jan 12, 2013 3:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
If you think relationships are for insecure people u are seriously mistaken. If you are insecureyou will never be able to hold on to relationships.however successful relationships are rare.

I won't go further into it but as far as your statement goes 100% false. Being secure and confident is the foundation of any successful relationship.
Author:  carib [ Sat Jan 12, 2013 3:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
Quote:
If you think relationships are for insecure people u are seriously mistaken. If you are insecureyou will never be able to hold on to relationships.however successful relationships are rare.

I won't go further into it but as far as your statement goes 100% false. Being secure and confident is the foundation of any successful relationship.
Cool, great opinion.
Author:  Bruce-Wayne [ Sun Jan 13, 2013 4:52 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
Well hey it works the other way too. Many guys avoid relationships and try to fill a void by sleeping with lots of girls. It's not about whiter you're in a relationship/single...it's about being self-secure.
Author:  TheFreshPrince [ Mon Jan 14, 2013 4:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
The way you worded it is what's creating the confusion. Insecure people love relationships. It gives them validation. This is true for both men and women. But not all relationships are based on insecurity.

All relationships (not just romantic ones, but those too) exist because they provide a mutual benefit to both parties. I have a good "relationship" with my waitresses at Norms because they provide conversation, good service, etc, and I tip them well. I used to have insecure romantic relationships, because I and whoever else, would validate each others' self-esteem.

Not all relationships are based on insecurity, but relationships are a great place for insecurity to dwell, if that makes sense.
Author:  trex1024 [ Tue Mar 05, 2013 1:21 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
Quote:
The way you worded it is what's creating the confusion. Insecure people love relationships. It gives them validation. This is true for both men and women. But not all relationships are based on insecurity.

All relationships (not just romantic ones, but those too) exist because they provide a mutual benefit to both parties. I have a good "relationship" with my waitresses at Norms because they provide conversation, good service, etc, and I tip them well. I used to have insecure romantic relationships, because I and whoever else, would validate each others' self-esteem.

Not all relationships are based on insecurity, but relationships are a great place for insecurity to dwell, if that makes sense.
AMEN Brother,

this year alone i have ruined it with two girls with the potential of a relationship. ones completely off the ropes and the other is slowly loosing interest.

i am very needy, insecure and beta-like. the opposites of confident and alpha. doesn't help that the second girl knows the game too.

Handle those before even thinking about a relationship.
Author:  iLoveTurtles [ Tue Mar 05, 2013 12:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
False because insecure people are too insecure about themselves to get significant other. They have problems asking someone out. That's what AFC is.
Author:  worldrunner [ Tue Mar 05, 2013 3:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
Some people stay or are in relationships because they are insecure and some others avoid being in relationships because they are insecure...

I guess that the key of a successful relationship is a mutual amount of inter-dependability.

And to my point of view this inter-dependability is broken in many aspects, women have access to jobs, houses, protection, home entertainment, cats and an infinite supply of chocolates nowadays, they do not need a man to protect them and make them feel loved anymore. Guys on the other hand we have access to video-games who give us adventure and tell us how great we are, tasty food, jobs, porn, hookers, dogs, etc. Besides reproduction and fear of loneliness there is not much more than we can provide to each other that can't be easily substituted by something else.
So yeah indeed you have a point where you say relationships are for insecure people.

For me an AFC is not has nothing to do with being single, being in a relationship or having sex with a lot of women. For me AFC is the person who lets fear lead his life, the guy who does not approach for because he is afraid of rejection, the guy who stays in a relationship with a person that hates because is afraid of being alone, the guy who sleeps with many girls just because he is afraid to be seen as who he really is, and having sex with many beautiful girls gives him some sort of validation.

Everyone who dares to get out of his comfort zone in order to achieve his dreams, not by the results but by daring to step out of that comfort zone to my eyes is not an AFC.

The problem with me and relationships is that so far all the girls that I've been able to attract have wanted me to remain an AFC and instead of encouraging me and giving me support in my dreams of becoming a better version of me, they nag and do lots of drama to keep me stuck in the comfort zone. The price of having to deal with drama and nagging is to high for me, now that I'm not afraid of loneliness and that the other aspects that a girlfriend can give me can be easily substituted.
Author:  DoubleCoffee [ Wed Mar 06, 2013 5:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Relationships are for insecure people - True or False
No offense but it seems to me like your giving up. Life gives you experiences, your job is to deal with them. If woman keep nagging you and bring you down. It probably means that your facing them always in the same way. Perhaps cutting off woman for a period is the experience you need now. My advice would be to just experience relationship in all its glory, the good the bad, and keep fucking around until you meet that one girl.
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