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ex told me she wants me back but if i change
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Author:  Top-Hat [ Tue Jan 01, 2013 8:54 pm ]
Post subject:  ex told me she wants me back but if i change

So my gf broke up with me yesterday then called me up today to tell me she wants to give me another chance if i change my maturity. We tend to argue alot and im the one who starts it. I told her that this situation is playing with my head and i wasnt sure. She asked for what i wanted to do, I then said "im here and willing to try, i'm going to relax a bit this has just hit me hard like you, as long as were both willing to try im sure it will work out".

So what do i do, this situation is a bit weird for me and i cant do anything until shes back in london if anything, do i talk to her till then ignore her for a while and wait for her to come back or have a balance between the 2

oh shit i just read that there will be a ban delete this threafd if it breaks the violation

Author:  vhou812 [ Thu Jan 03, 2013 6:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: ex told me she wants me back but if i change

Quote:
So my gf broke up with me yesterday then called me up today to tell me she wants to give me another chance if i change my maturity. We tend to argue alot and im the one who starts it. I told her that this situation is playing with my head and i wasnt sure. She asked for what i wanted to do, I then said "im here and willing to try, i'm going to relax a bit this has just hit me hard like you, as long as were both willing to try im sure it will work out".

So what do i do, this situation is a bit weird for me and i cant do anything until shes back in london if anything, do i talk to her till then ignore her for a while and wait for her to come back or have a balance between the 2

oh shit i just read that there will be a ban delete this threafd if it breaks the violation

I don't think you'll get banned because this happened yesterday. It's not abnormal for couples to fight, and break up in the heat of the moment, and then cooler heads decide they said things they didn't mean.

The question for you isn't whether you should talk to her or not. That will come out. The question is whether she is right that you need to grow up and not start all the arguments. You seem to own that a little bit, so the question is whether or not you want to change or not.

The relationship with her is a secondary issue. If you want to fix yourself, she sounds willing to be there to support you. If you don't, then she is out. It's hard to say anything more not knowing if you've left important details out, but based on what you have said, I'd say the decision really is whether or not you think you need to change in the way she wants you to, and if you want to do it for your own benefit, not hers. If you answer yes, then I'd say that will basically dictate what happens in your relationship with her, because it will inform how much you talk to her and what you talk about.

Author:  Top-Hat [ Sat Jan 05, 2013 7:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: ex told me she wants me back but if i change

Since I last post we've spent the last 2 days together, it was a bit weird for us at first but after having sex several times and just getting comfortable with each other it's gone back to normal, which in her words makes her head spin more.

There is still a bit of weirdness to this situation as we havent spoken about it yet (shes currently out with friends). I told her yesterday we could take a break, to see what we want next, it's very obvious what i want but she hasnt told me what she wants now.

Our relationship is very up and down and i've questioned the relationship several times, our main issue is we dont do enough which is due to my lack of money, but when i do we go out to eat alot, which slightly annoys me as i want to do something different, and because of our lack of adventures sometime have few things to talk about.

The only thing i'm worried about is, if i have oneitis, I have been a little needy the last 2 days which i've spoken to her about and she says she wanted me to take action.

Yes she is right i do need to change something about myself, not completely and am trying to show her that i do want to change and want her to support me.

Author:  Rough Operator [ Sun Jan 06, 2013 2:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: ex told me she wants me back but if i change

Take a step back man.

My relationship recently ended and towards the end she was all "I don't know what I want, I'm confused, my head is spinning" etc. You need to ask yourself if you can put up with the lack of clarity and uncertainty that her feeling like that will give you. I was an emotional mess because I let my ex hook me in and before I knew it she was virtually dictating my happiness, looking back I don't think it was healthy and though for some reason I still miss her, I know I am better off without her in my life.

I would just let her come to you, don't chase it or push it at this point unless you want to reinforce the decision she already seems to be toying with.

Author:  Top-Hat [ Tue Jan 08, 2013 6:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: ex told me she wants me back but if i change

So now she wants to have an open relationship, something which i dont want and she knows i dont want.

Now i dont know what to do, should i ditch her or wait and attempt to put it back to a normal relationship.

After a year long relationship i'm afraid i'm going to be that middle guy and its going to get me, i know i like this girl alot and have probably been afc, but i know that there is someone who will want to be in a proper relationship.

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