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Losing control - girlfriend
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Author:  steadmanralph [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 3:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Losing control - girlfriend
Hey guys, I'd just like to say that I've been reading PUA for a while now and it has really helped me alot.

I recently got a new girlfriend. Things have been great up until this past weekend. She got mad at me for being way too drunk and she hasn't been acting the same since. (Not talking and stuff/ not wanting to do anything with me) So i thought I'd give her space to relax and be on her own. I told her that if she needed to talk to me I'd be here. I also noticed this past few days, what suddenly came up in my facebook news feed is her keeps interacting with this other guy. (it's been going for a while now, but i just ignored it acting i know nothing) The fact that this guy keeps showing up over and over again and I know they have been talking for a while now and its starting to bother me.

So my question is, that how do i come about this situation without being such a wuss about it and acting jealous? I know they talk and it will be just a matter of time until they meet up face to face.
It's been fucking with my head, i can't help it and i know i need to improve my inner game.
I don't have much relationship experience, so i would like to handle this situation in a correct manner.

Thanks.
Author:  tru3demon [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 5:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
You are doing great. Make sure you keep the incessant apologizing to a minimum. Say you are sorry once, maybe twice and that's it. Do not continue talking about this past weekend, just change the subject and keep it happy and light. A slight freeze out might be in order. Just don't talk that much to her over text. Depends on how long you've been dating exclusively for.

About the guy, whatever you do DO NOT let her see you are jealous. If she ever brings up his name or that they have been talking or that she wants to meet up with him, just act very cool and calm and collected. Say "that sounds like fun" and then change the subject immediately like "so, how was your test yesterday? Think you passed?" Never bring him up and never ask questions until she starts seeing him more than you. Then just leave her. Easy.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 6:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
Hey guys, I'd just like to say that I've been reading PUA for a while now and it has really helped me alot.

I recently got a new girlfriend. Things have been great up until this past weekend. She got mad at me for being way too drunk and she hasn't been acting the same since. (Not talking and stuff/ not wanting to do anything with me) So i thought I'd give her space to relax and be on her own. I told her that if she needed to talk to me I'd be here. I also noticed this past few days, what suddenly came up in my facebook news feed is her keeps interacting with this other guy. (it's been going for a while now, but i just ignored it acting i know nothing) The fact that this guy keeps showing up over and over again and I know they have been talking for a while now and its starting to bother me.

So my question is, that how do i come about this situation without being such a wuss about it and acting jealous? I know they talk and it will be just a matter of time until they meet up face to face.
It's been fucking with my head, i can't help it and i know i need to improve my inner game.
I don't have much relationship experience, so i would like to handle this situation in a correct manner.

Thanks.
I don't know the parameters of the fight over being drunk, but that is not likely the issue.

I would suspect, either this other guy is gaming her, or she has developed a "crush" on him.

Some of the signs she may be considering cheating, or has cheated.

Changes in behavior;

Dressing nicer than usual, more care to makeup, perfume, just before taking off to points unknown.

Sudden focus on getting in shape, dieting, want to loose a few pound in shot order.

Working "longer hours", than prior. Is this guy a coworker?

She expresses how much she likes/respects this new colleague/friend, babbles on about him, then suddenly STOPS!

She suddenly cuts you out of contact from her family/social circle.

She has gotten defensive And paranoid, ESPECIALLY with her cell phone. She stutters and worries when you ask her innocent questions. She answers some phone calls and reacts awkwardly, while she completely avoids other calls.

If your seeing any of these signs, it may me time to dump her ass, unless you don't mind someone else stuffing her full of dick.

I'm not saying that she is cheating, I'm just saying these are very strong signs.

I can tell you HIS intentions.......
Author:  steadmanralph [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 6:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Okay she always dresses up nicely because thats just her. She can't leave her apartment without looking nice and stuff.
As you said, yes I'm pretty sure she has developed a "crush" on this guy. But she has NOT mentioned anything about him to me. I feel like she is doing it in purpose so i can see and act jealous. She likes the attention, but im not gunna play that game and beg for her. But heres the deal, we texted last night and brought up that we have a problem. I told her id like to talk about it.she said yes but not right now. I then told her to textme whenever shes rdy to talk. Should i wait till she contacts me Or stay busy for A day or two and get back to her when things settle.down?
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 7:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
Okay she always dresses up nicely because thats just her. She can't leave her apartment without looking nice and stuff.
As you said, yes I'm pretty sure she has developed a "crush" on this guy. But she has NOT mentioned anything about him to me. I feel like she is doing it in purpose so i can see and act jealous. She likes the attention, but im not gunna play that game and beg for her. But heres the deal, we texted last night and brought up that we have a problem. I told her id like to talk about it.she said yes but not right now. I then told her to textme whenever shes rdy to talk. Should i wait till she contacts me Or stay busy for A day or two and get back to her when things settle.down?
Time to flip the scrip. Freeze HER out a little, become scarce/busy.

Go hang out and flirt with other women.

She needs to be wondering if she will ever see you again. She should be wondering how much you like her. She should be wondering if you’re seeing other girls.
Let her wonder WTF your up to.

Act like you don't give a fuck where she is, what she is doing. The more time she sits around wondering what you’re doing… the more she begins to convince herself she is in love with you, not him.

Give the impression, the price of a "crush" is the cost of loosing you, after all YOU are the prize, not HER!
Author:  steadmanralph [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 8:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
Quote:
Okay she always dresses up nicely because thats just her. She can't leave her apartment without looking nice and stuff.
As you said, yes I'm pretty sure she has developed a "crush" on this guy. But she has NOT mentioned anything about him to me. I feel like she is doing it in purpose so i can see and act jealous. She likes the attention, but im not gunna play that game and beg for her. But heres the deal, we texted last night and brought up that we have a problem. I told her id like to talk about it.she said yes but not right now. I then told her to textme whenever shes rdy to talk. Should i wait till she contacts me Or stay busy for A day or two and get back to her when things settle.down?
Time to flip the scrip. Freeze HER out a little, become scarce/busy.

Go hang out and flirt with other women.

She needs to be wondering if she will ever see you again. She should be wondering how much you like her. She should be wondering if you’re seeing other girls.
Let her wonder WTF your up to.

Act like you don't give a fuck where she is, what she is doing. The more time she sits around wondering what you’re doing… the more she begins to convince herself she is in love with you, not him.

Give the impression, the price of a "crush" is the cost of loosing you, after all YOU are the prize, not HER!
Loving your advise man!
Yeah I'm definitely freezing her and staying busy for a day or two. I got school and a job anyways plus working out.

What should I do whenever i see her next when we "talk"? Should i just pretend it wasn't a big deal or let her know that if she acts like that again there will be consequences?
Lastly, what about texting? I know for a fact when she's going to start wondering what I've been up to she will text me. Keep it to a minimal or ignore it?

Really appreciate these advises.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 8:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Okay she always dresses up nicely because thats just her. She can't leave her apartment without looking nice and stuff.
As you said, yes I'm pretty sure she has developed a "crush" on this guy. But she has NOT mentioned anything about him to me. I feel like she is doing it in purpose so i can see and act jealous. She likes the attention, but im not gunna play that game and beg for her. But heres the deal, we texted last night and brought up that we have a problem. I told her id like to talk about it.she said yes but not right now. I then told her to textme whenever shes rdy to talk. Should i wait till she contacts me Or stay busy for A day or two and get back to her when things settle.down?
Time to flip the scrip. Freeze HER out a little, become scarce/busy.

Go hang out and flirt with other women.

She needs to be wondering if she will ever see you again. She should be wondering how much you like her. She should be wondering if you’re seeing other girls.
Let her wonder WTF your up to.

Act like you don't give a fuck where she is, what she is doing. The more time she sits around wondering what you’re doing… the more she begins to convince herself she is in love with you, not him.

Give the impression, the price of a "crush" is the cost of loosing you, after all YOU are the prize, not HER!
Loving your advise man!
Yeah I'm definitely freezing her and staying busy for a day or two. I got school and a job anyways plus working out.

What should I do whenever i see her next when we "talk"? Should i just pretend it wasn't a big deal or let her know that if she acts like that again there will be consequences?
Lastly, what about texting? I know for a fact when she's going to start wondering what I've been up to she will text me. Keep it to a minimal or ignore it?

Really appreciate these advises.
Like you say, just act like it's no big deal to YOU, prove this is how you will react.

But no telling her how you are is BETA, being who you are is ALPHA.
Author:  steadmanralph [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 8:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
can you just please elaborate the beta/alpha part, I'm not quite sure what you mean by it
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 9:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
can you just please elaborate the beta/alpha part, I'm not quite sure what you mean by it

A Beta, is a careful man who avoids risk and confrontation. Beta males lack the physical presence, charisma and confidence of the Alpha male.

I have posted this joke before, but I think it explains the concept very well.

Rather then a lengthy debate.

An old bull and a young bull were standing on a hill looking down on a valley full of cows. “Hey”, says the young bull. “Let’s run down and fuck one of those cows…”

“No”, says the old bull. “Let’s walk down and fuck them all.”

The young bull being Beta, the older wiser bull the Alpha.
Author:  steadmanralph [ Mon Dec 03, 2012 11:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
Quote:
can you just please elaborate the beta/alpha part, I'm not quite sure what you mean by it

A Beta, is a careful man who avoids risk and confrontation. Beta males lack the physical presence, charisma and confidence of the Alpha male.

I have posted this joke before, but I think it explains the concept very well.

Rather then a lengthy debate.

An old bull and a young bull were standing on a hill looking down on a valley full of cows. “Hey”, says the young bull. “Let’s run down and fuck one of those cows…”

“No”, says the old bull. “Let’s walk down and fuck them all.”

The young bull being Beta, the older wiser bull the Alpha.
So acting like its no big deal to her what happened will be BETA?
As you said Beta is who avoids risk and confrontation.
I just want to make it clear haha
Author:  Herne [ Tue Dec 04, 2012 12:11 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
There is a way i think that these kinda scenarios can be reversed and ive used it twice with lethal effect.

when you talk you say...''well imm my ex got in touch recently ans shes strongly hinting at giving us another chance''
her-always ''what did you say to her''
you '' havent said anything to her yet on the subject, gonna think about it a little''


she will run to you like a whore in heat and crush guy will be forgotten as if he never existed
Author:  steadmanralph [ Tue Dec 04, 2012 3:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
There is a way i think that these kinda scenarios can be reversed and ive used it twice with lethal effect.

when you talk you say...''well imm my ex got in touch recently ans shes strongly hinting at giving us another chance''
her-always ''what did you say to her''
you '' havent said anything to her yet on the subject, gonna think about it a little''


she will run to you like a whore in heat and crush guy will be forgotten as if he never existed

lol i feel like if i do that its just not going to end well. :P
Author:  Herne [ Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
''To get her you have to be prepared to lose her'' one of the founding fathers said that
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
Quote:
Quote:
There is a way i think that these kinda scenarios can be reversed and ive used it twice with lethal effect.

when you talk you say...''well imm my ex got in touch recently ans shes strongly hinting at giving us another chance''
her-always ''what did you say to her''
you '' havent said anything to her yet on the subject, gonna think about it a little''


she will run to you like a whore in heat and crush guy will be forgotten as if he never existed

lol i feel like if i do that its just not going to end well. :P
Sometimes risk is involved Bro, Its's what separates the Lions from the cubs.
Author:  steadmanralph [ Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Losing control - girlfriend
okay i freeze her for a day (not texting right away/staying busy) and told her that "ex-getting me back" story, plus i even flirted with girls via facebook and twitter. But I'm surprised shes playing it cool.
She didn't ask too much question about it and even joked about the situation.

I really feel she is starting to think i really don't care about her when i really do.

Right now she is sick and I've been nice to her and comforting but nothing over the top.
Though, I still feel we are not in the same page. How do i get back on track with us attracted to each other again?
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