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| I made a mistake, getting silent SPAM, time to be beta? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=147489 |
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| Author: | DayMan337 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | I made a mistake, getting silent SPAM, time to be beta? |
I've been a non-exclusive, semi-serious-but-not-really open relationship with this girl for 11 months. last week I decided it would be really funny if I played a prank on her saying that I just tested positive for herpes and syfilis (really bad idea... I know... but seriously who believes that? I mean does syfilis even exist any more?) Anyway the whole thing lasted like 3 minutes, but during that time she had burst out crying... I guess her dad walked in the room... bad stuff. We chatted for a bit after, didn't seem like she was that pissed. I apologized the next day, no response (she sent a random drunk text later that night), texted her a couple times the day after that no responses, made fun of her for giving me silent SPAM in a light-hearted way(that was Saturday). I know traditional logic would be to treat silence with more silence... but I realize clearly what I did was immature/wrong/not okay... so do I offer a second apology? Do I send her a text acknowledging that she's mad with some funny photos attached to it that I think will make her laugh? I really don't like playing the silent game because I feel it's childish to sink down to that level (and tbh this chick acts like a complete child about everything) |
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| Author: | mmallday [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:55 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Playing the silent game might be better than you think. Giving her some space could be helpful, but don't shut her out totally. I would let her recover for a little bit, then invite her to do something casually and see how it goes. |
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| Author: | vhou812 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 3:18 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I agree. Silence and space is a good idea. Not to punish her or retaliate so much as to let her assess how she really feels about it. And really, the thing to remember is that even if your joke was in poor taste, if you aplogized, what more can you do. Do you really want to be around someone who cannot forgive a mistake, even if a genuine apology has been issued? |
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| Author: | mmallday [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 4:38 am ] |
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Exactly even if the joke was was crude to her if she is going to make this big of deal about it... do you really want it? I thought that was funny but it could just be a guy thing. |
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| Author: | DayMan337 [ Fri Oct 05, 2012 1:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for the advice guys. My firs apology was a pretty brief text, may not have come off as very genuine. And my texts that followed were definitely not in a very apologetic tone. I'm thinking I'll send her a message that does not expect a response... "Hey wanted to say I'm sorry again (something funny here) have a good weekend!" |
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| Author: | SE23 [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 3:38 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
To be honest that joke sounds hilarious, its her fault she can't take a joke, serious red flag there ! |
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| Author: | P1nkstar [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 9:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Meet up with her, and apologise in her face. not true text, grab her and say it was only a joke and you don't want to ruin things over that. |
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| Author: | xXcruxXx [ Sat Oct 06, 2012 7:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yeah dude apologize to her face to face. You scared her for your own amusement. Not cool! Let her know you're sincerely sorry and take her out somewhere nice. |
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| Author: | Dr. Jones [ Sun Oct 07, 2012 12:08 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Do you think she's more offended by the joke, or more amused at your hat-in-hand attempts to make things "okay"? I agree with apologizing in person, but not taking her someplace nice to seal the deal. It was a joke, after all. If you offer an apology and it's sincere and she won't take it, what else can you do? |
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| Author: | DayMan337 [ Mon Oct 08, 2012 3:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
So on Friday I sent her a text with a short video I made from photos of us/other random funny shit. (Sounds really try-hard, but the thing took 8mins to create and was much more ridiculous/funny than it was romantic). Still no response... if I did get a chance to see her in person of course I would apologize again... but at this point I have to assume the worse and guess that it's over? Really lame... and I like this girl more than any other girl I've ever known, by a wide margin... but I'm not sure what else can be done. Maybe after a week-10 days of no contact I'll check in one last time... if I could think of a way to fix the situation I would but I just don't know how at this point - any thoughts? |
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| Author: | league [ Mon Oct 08, 2012 9:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
it not like she caught you in bed with her dad for christ sake!!!! if she likes you that much she'll start testing the waters with you |
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| Author: | DayMan337 [ Mon Oct 08, 2012 9:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: it not like she caught you in bed with her dad for christ sake!!!!
Yeah we might be past that haha, we both agreed were too young for monogomy... we definitely care about each other but its gotten to the pt where we tell eachother about our other hookups
if she likes you that much she'll start testing the waters with you |
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| Author: | T.Sterling [ Sat Oct 27, 2012 2:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
That's actually pretty funny lol, not to laugh at your expense or anything. But yeah, silent SPAM isn't the way to go. Just calibrate to the amount of attention she is giving to you, and make it a little bit less. Should bounce back just fine. |
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