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What to do when she cancels our plans.
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=135368		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  PUAzilla [ Tue May 08, 2012 7:38 am ]
Post subject:  What to do when she cancels our plans.
I see my gf 3/4 times a week. (We live 10 minutes walk away from eachother.)

Quite often, like every other week, she says to me 'I can't see you friday because I'm seeing my girl friends' or something like that.

It could be any day or any excuse (a lot of the time it's work parties).

It's fine if it's in the week because we can just rearrange...

But it's annoying if it's friday/saturday because I have to find something else to do.



How do I deal with this? I'm happy for her to do her own thing, that's healthy.
But she's doing this to me every other week and it's getting annoying.

Last night she said 'I'm not seeing you friday'. I was like 'Fine, that's okay'. I went quiet after that and took her home. She asked me if I was okay because I wasn't talking much. I said I was fine.

Am I being sulky?

What should I do? Initiate a soft next for a while?

Any help would be appreciated. :)
Author:  Rory1337 [ Tue May 08, 2012 8:25 am ]
Post subject:  Re: What to do when she cancels our plans.
Quote:
I see my gf 3/4 times a week. (We live 10 minutes walk away from eachother.)

Quite often, like every other week, she says to me 'I can't see you friday because I'm seeing my girl friends' or something like that.

It could be any day or any excuse (a lot of the time it's work parties).

It's fine if it's in the week because we can just rearrange...

But it's annoying if it's friday/saturday because I have to find something else to do.



How do I deal with this? I'm happy for her to do her own thing, that's healthy.
But she's doing this to me every other week and it's getting annoying.

Last night she said 'I'm not seeing you friday'. I was like 'Fine, that's okay'. I went quiet after that and took her home. She asked me if I was okay because I wasn't talking much. I said I was fine.

Am I being sulky?

What should I do? Initiate a soft next for a while?

Any help would be appreciated. :)
Same question different day.
girlfriend-flakes-time-for-freeze-out-vt134478.html
Author:  PUAzilla [ Tue May 08, 2012 8:36 am ]
Post subject: 
I've read that.

So the key is to remain cool, act like it's not a problem yet withdraw some of attention from her?
Author:  kaDak8 [ Tue May 08, 2012 9:44 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
it's annoying if it's friday/saturday because I have to find something else to do.
Always have something else to do! Don't be all dependant on her. Meeting friends or going to the gym are great options.

You shuold do a lot of things all the time other than seeing your GF.

Don't freak out about this. She is not flaking, cancelling your dates, right?
And she lets you know about these days in advance, right?

I'm sure you also have guys out nights or any other occasions when you cannot see her. It is totally fine, if you tell each other about these days in advance (and not cancelling dates).

So she's also communicating that you can count on seeing her other days, except for that 1 day every once in while. She's also sub-communicating that she doesn't want you to have plans for lets say Saturday, becasue she is busy on Firday -> this is making plans on seeing each other easier.

Give us more details coz I don't see anything wrong here.
Author:  PUAzilla [ Tue May 08, 2012 9:54 am ]
Post subject: 
I got loads of things I can do.

Plenty of parties, etc.

It's just annoying.

The second she told me I just went quiet.
Should I maintain a happy, upbeat frame even in the face of that?!
Author:  kaDak8 [ Tue May 08, 2012 10:08 am ]
Post subject: 
Yes, look, she is telling you days in advance about her plans, be happy for her, don't let this effect you negatively.

Imagine this scenario, an extreme one on negative emotions:
-She tells you about her plans that she is busy on Friday (which makes you able to make plans with her for the remaining 6 days!)
-You become angry, start freaking out, punish her, etc.

This is clearly needy AFC behaviour to the extreme. Becoming speechless seems slightly like this one for me. This is non verbally communicating being disappointed, sad, needy of her.

You can causally ask her what whe would be doing if you wanna know and add witty, joking comments and support her. But don't show negative emotions.
Author:  PUAzilla [ Tue May 08, 2012 12:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Okay thanks man. I know it's needy afc bitchy behaviour on my part.

I just need to get a grip. :roll:
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