PUA Forum :: Some guy constantly orbits around my girl.

The Fantasy of Purity
She only has sex with me. That means she loves me.
Why do guys stay in exclusive relationships when they admit they are bored and not getting the type of sex they want. Just because supposedly the girl is so sweet and innocent. A so called good girl.
So I’m calling your bluff.
If you’re so bored and you’re not having the type of relationship you really, want then get out of it.Why do these guys stay?
It’s because they are scared they will never really be loved.
I believe despite the boredom some guys are enjoying a secret benefit of the exclusive relationship that they are embarrassed to talk about.
The Fantasy of Purity. She is only having sex with me. That means she loves me. I am loved. I can see why the “Bad Girl” who loves sex is such a threat to any man who equates being loved with a
woman’s sexual choices.
M/w Thinking
If my girlfriend loves kinky sex that means she might easily hook up with someone else if I’m not
there to defend it. If she does have sex with someone else that means she doesn’t love me.Which means I am not loved.

Defenders of Purity
Are you really going to spend your whole life trying to defend a woman from having sex with someone else so you can feel loved?
Are you really going to be too scared to take a long vacation with your buddies. Are you going to forbid her go to Vegas with her girlfriends? Are you going to sacrifice your freedom for her purity.

The truth is nobody will ever love you unconditionally besides your mom. But in reality no one can really love you but yourself. Your girlfriends only love the feeling of sexual attraction you give them.
It’s all about the pleasure chemicals. And the action is all happening inside her body.

When the feeling of sexual attraction you provide is gone sooner or later she moves on and some other guy is getting his pole smoked. Sexual attraction is a selfish bitch. There are many guys who have absolutely no problem dating several women and do so with ease. They seem to sleep well at night. I bet they would tell you they feel loved.

What’s their secret?
They don’t equate she is having or might have sex with another man as meaning she doesn’t love them.They understand she never really loved them anyway. Because it’s a relationship built on sexual attraction she could never love them in the way we all really hope to be loved, unconditionally.
They get their unconditional love from family. They get their self esteem from work and through hobbies. They volunteer, give to charity, go to church, socialize to give value and make hundreds of human connections throughout their lives keeping them fulfilled and feeling loved.

There are many other forms of love out there in the world. If you really want to be loved practice giving to others. Just like if you want good friends be a good friend first.
Are you ready to stop relying on a woman’s purity as the benchmark that you are loved.And if so, what are you waiting for?
Purity is just a fantasy.
Be free and love yourself.
You will always have Freedom
Women don’t just give away pure female affection with no strings attached for long periods of time.Purity is their trump card. Purity is a billion dollar business. And women are all too happy to give you
your fantasy, but you will pay for it. Whether that be through freedom, money, time, drama, supporting
kids, whatever.
It’s been said that as men we are biologically wired to feel repulsed when a woman we love has sex
with another man. We find it too hard to accept their affection after that.
Maybe it’s a defense against raising a child that is not ours. You might not be able to stop these
emotions but there is one thing that will always cheer you up.
You may never have one womans purity.
But you will always have freedom.

Author:	needlz [ Sat May 05, 2012 1:28 am ]
Post subject:	Some guy constantly orbits around my girl.
So me and my girl have been together for about two months and it's going pretty good. One thing that's bothering me though, there's this guy "friend" she constantly goes out with. He has a girlfriend for about five years. She knows his girlfriend and they sometime go out together, but it's mostly just the two of them. He's been around in her life much longer than I have (his girlfriend too, but her and my girl aren't that close). She never told me anything about him making a move on her or something, and he looks like your typical friend-zoned AFC, but they've been going out together way too much, to the point where her Facebook photos are full of him and her hugging partying and acting stupid. I never met him and I've never been intimidated by him, because of his AFC behavior and mostly because my girl is very into me. But this has been going on for too long. What triggered me was that she told me that he and his girl are getting "bored" of each-other after five years. They only ever slept with eachother, and they're scared of "never being with other people for the rest of their lives". I don't know if they reached any conclusion, but as far as I know that's just how they feel. I don't know what to think, maybe he has his eyes set on my girl and maybe he doesn't. Either way I think going out with him constantly is disrespecting me and I want it stopped. But I don't know how to approach it. If I tell her to stop seeing him that looks weak as hell and might put him in a better position. If I do nothing it might get worse. I thought about using some kind of a friend-destroyer, maybe something like "He even got his girlfriend bored of him, why are you even hanging out with this guy?"... But it's not that great. Bottom line, I need this to stop. Any suggestions?

Author:	1eye [ Sat May 05, 2012 2:06 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Some guy constantly orbits around my girl.
This is 60 years of challenge's answer... Quote: The Fantasy of Purity She only has sex with me. That means she loves me. Why do guys stay in exclusive relationships when they admit they are bored and not getting the type of sex they want. Just because supposedly the girl is so sweet and innocent. A so called good girl. So I’m calling your bluff. If you’re so bored and you’re not having the type of relationship you really, want then get out of it.Why do these guys stay? It’s because they are scared they will never really be loved. I believe despite the boredom some guys are enjoying a secret benefit of the exclusive relationship that they are embarrassed to talk about. The Fantasy of Purity. She is only having sex with me. That means she loves me. I am loved. I can see why the “Bad Girl” who loves sex is such a threat to any man who equates being loved with a woman’s sexual choices. M/w Thinking If my girlfriend loves kinky sex that means she might easily hook up with someone else if I’m not there to defend it. If she does have sex with someone else that means she doesn’t love me.Which means I am not loved. Defenders of Purity Are you really going to spend your whole life trying to defend a woman from having sex with someone else so you can feel loved? Are you really going to be too scared to take a long vacation with your buddies. Are you going to forbid her go to Vegas with her girlfriends? Are you going to sacrifice your freedom for her purity. The truth is nobody will ever love you unconditionally besides your mom. But in reality no one can really love you but yourself. Your girlfriends only love the feeling of sexual attraction you give them. It’s all about the pleasure chemicals. And the action is all happening inside her body. When the feeling of sexual attraction you provide is gone sooner or later she moves on and some other guy is getting his pole smoked. Sexual attraction is a selfish bitch. There are many guys who have absolutely no problem dating several women and do so with ease. They seem to sleep well at night. I bet they would tell you they feel loved. What’s their secret? They don’t equate she is having or might have sex with another man as meaning she doesn’t love them.They understand she never really loved them anyway. Because it’s a relationship built on sexual attraction she could never love them in the way we all really hope to be loved, unconditionally. They get their unconditional love from family. They get their self esteem from work and through hobbies. They volunteer, give to charity, go to church, socialize to give value and make hundreds of human connections throughout their lives keeping them fulfilled and feeling loved. There are many other forms of love out there in the world. If you really want to be loved practice giving to others. Just like if you want good friends be a good friend first. Are you ready to stop relying on a woman’s purity as the benchmark that you are loved.And if so, what are you waiting for? Purity is just a fantasy. Be free and love yourself. You will always have Freedom Women don’t just give away pure female affection with no strings attached for long periods of time.Purity is their trump card. Purity is a billion dollar business. And women are all too happy to give you your fantasy, but you will pay for it. Whether that be through freedom, money, time, drama, supporting kids, whatever. It’s been said that as men we are biologically wired to feel repulsed when a woman we love has sex with another man. We find it too hard to accept their affection after that. Maybe it’s a defense against raising a child that is not ours. You might not be able to stop these emotions but there is one thing that will always cheer you up. You may never have one womans purity. But you will always have freedom.

Author:	needlz [ Sat May 05, 2012 2:21 am ]
Post subject:
Did you read my post or did you just feel like quoting 60yoc?

Author:	izumi [ Sat May 05, 2012 2:31 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Some guy constantly orbits around my girl.
Quote: I never met him and I've never been intimidated by him, because of his AFC behavior and mostly because my girl is very into me. Why are you posting this topic then? for the lulz?

Author:	league [ Sat May 05, 2012 6:58 am ]
Post subject:
i'm in pretty much the same situation, theres a guy constantly creeping my girl, he's acting all AFC about it the same as your guy. I just act disinterested about him safe in the knowledge his AFC ways will ruin it by himself.

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Author:	mope [ Sat May 05, 2012 10:24 am ]
Post subject:
just a thought, i might suggest to your girl that you meet this guy, since it's clear that he is such a good friend to her and of course you want to be friends with her friends right? then when you do meet, you can alpha him, or whatever puts you in a dominant (or at least sexually dominant) position

Author:	870 [ Sat May 05, 2012 12:59 pm ]
Post subject:
I already answered this a long time ago here: cheating-male-best-friends-and-jealousy-vt48749.html Your boy, 870

Author:	Reo [ Sat May 05, 2012 5:05 pm ]
Post subject:
i made a post on how to get rid of those types of guy friends it applies to your situation. Time for you to get a handle on things. how-to-get-rid-of-the-guy-friends--vt11 ... highlight= warning this will only work for you if you have the most leverage in the relationship

Author:	1eye [ Sun May 06, 2012 2:59 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Did you read my post or did you just feel like quoting 60yoc? Quote: Sun Tze- The art of war: Know yourself and know your enemy,in a hundred battles you will be victorious 100 times." I did read your post if you don't want to see the truth you are free to ignore the advice.

Author:	Snarg [ Sun May 06, 2012 4:02 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: Did you read my post or did you just feel like quoting 60yoc? Quote: Sun Tze- The art of war: Know yourself and know your enemy,in a hundred battles you will be victorious 100 times." I did read your post if you don't want to see the truth you are free to ignore the advice. Don't pass an opinion off as truth. Personally, I see a lot of 60yoc's philosophy as absolute bullshit when it comes to purity being a fantasy.

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